mlb Page 514 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Rookie's First Big League Memory Held For Ransom
You've heard stories about ballhawks, those unwieldy characters who scoop up milestone home run balls only to hold them for ransom from the players who hit them. This is one of those tales....

Lidge Meltdown Brings On Fan Meltdown
Though this video contains a dejected Phillies fan, it could be any one of us. In just three minutes, he articulates, very inarticulately, the pain we've all felt. I present to you the Überfansch, whose transcendence will justify our existence....

Why Your Empty Stadium Sucks
This is what professional baseball in Pittsburgh looks like in late September when the Pirates are some 30 games back and 3-22 over their last 25, and the Cincinnati Reds and a bunch of world leaders are in town....

Baseball Statgeeks, iPhone Dorks Finally Join Forces
FanGraphs has an iPhone app now. "Live win probability and win probability graphs"! "Basic/Advanced/Value stats for any baseball player"! I do believe FanGraphs commenter Kevin S. speaks for all of us: "I just splooged in my pants." [FanGraphs]...

Mark McGwire's Insurance Policy Required Him To Take The Stuff That Inspired Our National 'Roids Hysteria
We all know about Mark McGwire and his (completely legal) use of Androstenedione, thanks to the hall monitors in our sporting press. What we didn't know: The Lloyd's underwriters who had insured McGwire's ankle required that he continue taking Andro....

"The Stadium Died At 9:24"
See also: Tiger Stadium Leveled to Final Shovel of Dust [Sports Climax]...

Sports Will Make Detroit Happy Again, Sportswriters Continue To Claim
Oh, look. A sportswriter has parachuted into Detroit and found a hard-luck city with a shrinking tax base in the maw of a recession whose spirits nonetheless brighten because Brandon Inge just ran out a grounder to short. Yay!...

We're Running Out Of American History
A painting of Tommy Lasorda now hangs at the National Portrait Gallery in D.C. Expect Vlad Guerrero shortly to lay out the painting with a broken bat. [LA Times]...

Yankees Not Clear On The Concept Of "Hazing"
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Houston Astros Fire Their "Manager"
With 13 games to go in their dismal season, the Astros—an alleged "base ball" team from Houston—have fired manager Cecil Cooper. In other news, Cecil Cooper was apparently managing the Astros this season! [Houston Chronicle]...

Giants' Teenage Prospect Now A Murder Suspect
Angel Villalona, a Giants top prospect, was scouted at 13 and signed by San Francisco at 16, and now, at 19, he's the prime suspect in a murder in the Dominican Republic, a top prospect of an entirely different sort....

The Cubs Cannot Be Sold Until Shawon Dunston Takes Freshman Lit
"Looks like everything is running smoothly with the sale of the Cubs. Let's just finalize everything with your signature here, and...hold on, what's this? A retired journeyman shortstop never went to college?"...

England's Baseball Acumen Is Spot-On
"Twitter has decided to act after Tony La Russa, the coach of an obscure American baseball team, launched a legal action over a fake account." They've got the 2nd most championships, like obscure English soccer team Manchester United. [Daily Mail]...

Lenny Dykstra Now Reduced To Stealing From Wayne Gretzky
Dykstra may not have a wad of cash anymore, but at least he has two multi-million dollar homes. Whoops! Seems he's been banned from entering those, because Nails has been stealing anything not nailed down....

A <em>Star Wars</em> Geek, Randy Wolf Is
Asked, in the best Q&A ever, which Star Wars character would make the ideal baseball player, Wolf responds: "[T]he Emperor is unstoppable. He seems like he could pretty much get it done." It's true. His stuff is electric. [StarWars.com]...

Why Your Stadium Sucks: Petco Park
This is a weekly feature in which I (and maybe you, too, readers) detail the various reasons for hating your ballpark. This week: Petco Park....

Yankees More Than Willing To Employ Crazy Old Men
Senior citizens are suing the Bombers for age discrimination after one was asked in a job interview, "What could someone 73 years old offer the Yankees?" I don't know...lunatic micromanagement and a Dave Winfield blackmail file? [NYPost]...

This Man Has An Opinion On The NL West
Former Journey lead singer Steve Perry is a Giants fan. "Don't Stop Believin'" is the Dodgers' 2009 anthem. That, in the journalism industry, is what we call: conflict!...

The 2009 Washington Nationals: A Season Of Bigger Failure
Despite appearances, the New York Mets are not baseball's worst team. That honor belongs to the Washington Nationals, a organization whose legendary incompetence should be memorialized on the marble arches of the great city that wishes they played elsewhere....

Nationals Hat A Terrorist Symbol Now
Would you associate this logo with evil? With soul-crushing sorrow, and with everything that is bad and wrong in the world? Of course you would. But terrorism?...