mlb Page 553 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Kid Who Fell Onto Field Further Traumatized By Dopey Matt Lauer Interview
It pays to be a klutz in Philadelphia: The kid who tumbled from the stands onto the warning track at Citizens Bank Ballpark on Thursday woke up the next day to new-found celebrity, collecting a bunch of Phillies memorabilia, game tickets and a trip to New York for an interview on the Today Show. The...
Moon Over Parma: Those Indians Are White Hot
Has anyone noticed that the Cleveland Indians have won 10 in a row? And 16 of their past 19? Excitement is at a fever pitch along the Cuyahoga, where they're talking division title, ALCS, and World Series! (Checks AL Central standings. Carefully folds newspaper, slowly rises from desk and leaves roo...
Ozzie Guillen Bids Farewell To His Personal Lord Voldemort
Reaction to Jay Mariotti's resignation from the Chicago Sun-Times continues to pour in — there hasn't been this much freewheeling glee since the announcement of the end of World War II — and of course Ozzie Guillen is leading the hurrahs. While admitting that his own tenure in Chicago most assuredly...
So, Yankee Stadium Takes This No Moving During "God Bless America"-Thing Rather Seriously
Remember a little more than a year ago when George Steinbrenner, inflated with patriotic fervor, imposed a laughable rule that instructed security officials to ban anyone from "excessive movement" during the 7th inning rendition of "God Bless America." Granted, most New Yorkers seemingly abide by it...
Alex Rodriguez And The Art Of The Double Play
Let it be known that the Yankees officially succumbed in the AL East last night; time of death 10:27 p.m., EST. It was all Alex Rodriguez's fault, of course. The only question is, what shall we call him after his 0-for-5 performance in a 7-3 loss to the Red Sox? Boo-Rod? A-Flop? A-Rod And Out? A-Wad...
This Is Why Rock Fights Are Fun
So, there was this predictable exchange between the front desk guy in my apartment building and another guy as I went out to grab some smokes while the Phillies were down 7-1 in the 4th inning last night to the Mets. "Of course they'd come down to earth. Take 4 from the Dodgers then they get blown o...
Presenting The Unbreakable Wooden Bat. Pedro Cerrano Approves
First man split the atom, then he invented the toaster pastry, and now this: A New Jersey man has developed the first unbreakable wooden bat. Ward Dill, an MIT graduate, put his Radial Bat through the paces on Tuesday, promising that it will never shatter, will not make that annoying "ping" sound, a...
Mr. Met Sez: Damn It Feels Good To Be A Gangsta
If there's one thing I've learned in this world, it's that you do not f—- with Mr. Met. He has a bad attitude and a collection of shivs he made in prison, so watch out. Just look at this photo, where Mr. Met is saying "Don't f—- with my hos, or I will STICK YOU, man!" And witness the video following...
Cubs Or White Sox? Obama Invites North Side Scorn
As you saw in our morning video pancake breakfast, ESPN's Stuart Scott figured that the best way to get to know Barack Obama was to play him in a game of one-on-one (hard foul, Obama takes an elbow to the head! Now they're brawling! ...). Scott then sat down with the Democratic Presidential nominee ...
The Strange Saga Of A.J. Pierzynski And Doug Eddings Continues
Is this the episode where Doug Eddings reveals that he is A.J. Pierzynski's father? Something's going on; and the Rays aren't happy about it. Take a look at this play in the 10th, where it appears that Pierzynski is tagged out in a rundown between second and third. But second base umpire Eddings rul...
MLB Closer: Do Not Taunt Surly Third-Place Kitty
Zach Miner of Los Tigres Detroit committed regicide on the monarchs from Missouri, allowing only three singles in seven innings on the way to a 4-0 victory in Kansas City last night. How could he get away with such domination on a major league franchise while only striking out three? How could he kn...
Country Music's Newest Star Looks Awfully Familiar, And Inexpensive
Jessica Simpson was a big deal just a short time ago, right? We thought so. We vaguely remember some kind of movie she was in and she was singing songs and then she dated a guy we all heard of... all of that happened, right? Because now she's reinventing herself in the easier-to-penetrate country mu...
MLB Closer: The Girl with the Strong Arm
Neal Cotts loves The Dead Milkmen. Or so we assume. After all, he's a rural boy from a small town born between 27 years and 36 years ago. Also, he gave up a grand slam to Willie F. Harris in the fifth inning at Wrigley Field yesterday afternoon, tossing Jason Marquis under the El and leaving the Was...
Get Ready To Panic, ESPN; Yankees And Red Sox May Both Miss Playoffs
The year was 1993. Bill Clinton ascends to the White House. The Bills lose their third consecutive Super Bowl. "Whoomp! (There It Is)" by Tag Team is America's No. 1 song. And in a strike-shortened season, both the Yankees and Red Sox fail to make the playoffs. That's the last time that's happened, ...
Jimmy Rollins: 'In Philly, Can't Be No Punk'
Jimmy Rollins' love affair with the city of Philadelphia continues. Last week he called out Phils fans on Best Damn Sports Show Period, decrying their notorious negativity and calling them "front-runners." That caused a Philadelphia blogger to organize an Internet campaign to try and get fans to che...
Mike Timlin Will Take Care Of Your Ballpark Rat Problem
As long as Red Sox pitcher Mike Timlin is alive, Heidi Watney will never go hungry. Hope you enjoy squirrel, Heidi. You mean to say that hawk was a lovable team mascot? Sorry, my bad. Now, watch me shoot an apple off of a teammate's head. Damn it, hold still Youkilis! From Timlin's bio: ...
B.J. Upton Has No Time To Run Out Doubles
One has to wonder why the Rays didn't pull the trigger and sign Barry Bonds long ago; he would have fit in quite well. They could give him the locker right next to B.J. Upton, and together they could form the Home Run or Nothing Club. Hmm. Are storm clouds gathering above the Rays' quest of an AL Ea...
It's Cheer Day In Philadelphia! (This Will Not End Well)
Ah Philadelphia, Land of 10,000 Losses; where they throw batteries at J.D. Drew and boo Santa Claus. Derision falls like rain here, and everyone gets soaked; especially the Phillies, who are in danger of slip slidin' away in the NL East. The reason? According to Jimmy Rollins, it's fan negativity. H...
The Manny Wigs Are Here; Get 'Em While They Last
Now available at the Dodgers Pro Shop, finally; Manny Ramirez dreadlock wigs. The Dodgers were quite crafty with the release of this item; they're here just in time for back-to-school shopping. Backpack? Check. Binder? Check. Manny wig? Si! If the team wants to have any hope of outbidding the Yankee...
This Could Be It For Tom Glavine
Tom Glavine is out for the season. Dude tore up some ligaments in his elbow and says he won't come back if he has to get that ligament completely replaced. The 42-year-old went back to the Braves, turning down more money from the Mets to play where he had kept his offseason home. But he hasn't play...