mutton Page 1 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
It's Mutton Bustin' Chaos In Houston
The Texans and Jaguars don’t kick off until 1 p.m. EST today, but the hair-raising action is well underway in Houston. Mutton bustin’, America’s true past time where kids willfully and repeatedly eat shit while trying to cling to the backs of rampaging sheep, took over Houston’s stadium this morning...
Tanzania's Goat Races Are Decadent And Depraved
Slumgoat Millionaire lost his first race at the Dar es Salaam Charity Goat Races. While the “owners” (sponsors, really) were standing in the corral at the center of the small racetrack, one of the MCs asked Slumgoat’s patron if he knew the rules....
Those Glorious Nights When Mutton-Bustin' Is On TV
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Five-Year-Old Mutton Bustin' Rider Eats It
Sorry, soccer. Mutton bustin', in which small children feebly hold onto sheep until they're thrown into the dirt, is the only sport worthy of being called "The Beautiful Game." ...
Bull Skating Is A Sport That Is Real And Awesome
You know the part in Westerns where a bad guy gallops off with some widow's or orphan's horse, so the roguish anti-hero tears after him on his own stallion, and when he catches up to him the two battle it out stride by stride until the anti-hero finally shoots the bad guy off and thus has to corral ...
Don't You Dare Call Mutton Bustin' "Wool Riding"
Part of me loves this Modern Farmer article about mutton bustin', because looking at pictures of small children getting busted by some mutton is always a good time. But part of me also hates it, because it claims that mutton bustin' is also known as "wool riding." That's a foul, Modern Farmer!...
City Of New York Cancels Mutton-Bustin', Rodeo's Greatest Event
The scores of finance bros and curious onlookers who crowded into Madison Square Garden for the arena's annual dabble in rodeo over the weekend did not get an authentic picture of the tradition. They had overpriced pints of light beer and Cracker Jacks; some, I'm sure, had worn plaid and cowboy hats...
There's No Cryin' In Mutton-Bustin'
North Texas's world-renowned mutton-bustin' exhibition, the Mesquite Championship Rodeo, will soon be upon us. Which means Good Day Dallas, with whom we've had some fun before, had to visit the rodeo. And when they visit, everything goes wrong. Because, you see, these are four-year-olds riding waywa...
Duchess Kate Is The Future Queen Of Mutton Bustin'
Here are the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge surveying the remains of empire at the Calgary Stampede. The Duchess, according to the indispensable (and endearingly capitalized) official website of The British Monarchy, "is a keen sportswoman, and has been involved in many different sports over the year...
The Mutton Bustin' Season Is Officially Open
It's that time of year again, when small hapless children have their skulls driven deep into the dirt by disdainful mutton. And then we laugh at them (the children). But we're not merely laughing at pain in a public setting. No, we're also celebrating mutton. Look at the disdainful expression on th...
When Mutton Bustin' Goes Horribly Wrong
Derekscott "Bubba" Kirby is like all small children in the Southwest: he's a mutton buster. However, unlike most mutton busters, little Derekscott is infected with E. coli....
Mutton-Almost-Bustin' At The Tour De France
Alberto Contador came 108 miles closer to winning his third Tour, no thanks to a bunch of of sheep who came out of fucking nowhere to dart across the road in front of the peloton....
Angry Sheep Still Trampling Our Nation's Children
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Deadspin Classic: A Children's Treasury Of Men Getting Blasted In The Face With Champagne
We at Deadspin research spent a solid day compiling these photos, and hardly any of you stopped to admire our work the first time around. So you know what? Here they are again, like a cold blast of liquid to the face....
The Biggest Supporters Around
To conclude one of the boobsiest days in Deadspin history, here's this picture of some strategically placed fans/cameramen at last night's Thunder-Jazz and Penguins-Capitals trackmeets. Mutton wins again. H/t Eric and Patrick....
Sausage Race Nearly Ends In Vehicular Manslaughter
Milwaukee's annual Opening Day Beef Tube Relay Race took a hilarious, nearly tragic turn when the Italian sausage was almost run over by its police escort. When did Randall Simon become a cop? [Last Angry Fan; video via]...
Terrified Children Still Being Thrown, Taunted By Angry Sheep
It's been a while since we've had a quality bustin' incident featured here, but thankfully the heartless marketing team of the Colorado Mammoth's professional lacrosse organization recently let the mighty sheep embarrass some over-matched tots during halftime. Mutton victorious....
A Children's Treasury Of Mascots Eating People
Mascots are running wild at our sporting events, both home and abroad. Who will put a stop to the madness? And why won't the music coordinators at these arenas use Temple of the Dog in place of Weird Al?...
An Intern Introduction And A Poop-Related Apology
Hello. If you haven't heard, I'm the new Deadspintern (feel free to suggest a nickname). I hope you have enjoyed what I've done so far because it's been a real hoot....