nab Page 16 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

This Evening: Say Goodnight To Donovan McNabb
Your p.m. roundup for Oct. 17, the day we learned cancer was two-faced. Photo via Mocksession, though a decision on whether McNabb will start this week is coming Wednesday. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

South Africa To Miss Out On Africa Cup Of Nations After Deliberately Playing To Boring 0-0 Draw
The South African national soccer team intentionally played to a 0-0 draw against Sierra Leone this past Saturday, and then danced across the field in celebration of having qualified for the 2012 Africa Cup of Nations. The problem: Bafana Bafana, as the team is known, had not qualified for the 2012 ...

Andy Reid Has Lost Philadelphia
Sometimes it happens all at once. After 12 years and almost as many votes of confidence, one day a coach can wake up and everything he's accomplished means nothing, all his team's promise is tacitly promised to his successor....

"Life Is Like A Jump Shot": Reviewing The Unremarkable History Of NBA Rappers
NBA players like rapping, and that is a fact of the universe that we are powerless to stop. The way that I have tended to deal this phenomenon is generally to ignore it completely. It is shockingly easy to do: Just as I do with Kreayshawn, I pretend that NBA rappers do not exist, that they have neve...

Watch An Agile Woman Juggle Five Balls With Her Hands And Feet
In this video that's titled "Selyna Bogino doing the 5 balls longest routine ever! XD," Italian acrobat Selyna Bogino apparently does the 5 balls longer than anybody — woman or man — has done it before....

Chris Kluwe Conditionally Surrenders No. 5 To New Vikings QB Donovan McNabb
Your morning roundup for July 30, the day we're provided with living proof that 32-year-old women are, in fact, into 83-year-old men. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Guess Who Arrived First For Broncos Practice Today?
At 8:01 this morning: "Tim Tebow. Of course." [@AdamSchefter]...

Justin Abdelkader Would Bomb Michigan's Big House Off The Map If He Could
The Red Wings' Abdelkader, a former Spartan, took a ride with the Blue Angels in an F/A-18 Hornet. "We flew over Ann Arbor, went over the Big House – if we'd had had a couple bombs on it, maybe we would have dropped a couple on there." He's joking, we think. [Detroit Free Press]...

Oh Great, They're Letting 8-Year-Old Girls Fight In Muay Thai Rings Now
"Princess" Jasmine Parr and Georgina "Punch Out" Barton will do battle in Australia today. (Hell, they already may have, what with the International Date Line and all). Parr is the eight-year-old daughter of kickboxing champion John Wayne Parr; Barton the brood of some similarly irresponsible pare...

Bernard Hopkins Finally Explains His Loathing For Donovan McNabb And How He Can "Look Through A Man's Soul"
You might recall that before he became the oldest boxing champ in history last weekend, Bernard Hopkins had some choice words for Donovan McNabb, who never had much truck with the boxer, aside from neglecting to shake his hand when Hopkins visited the Eagles training center in 2004. Never one to let...

Clemson, Davidson Up The Rain-Delay-Antics Ante With Human Bowling, Wartime Re-Enactment, And Curling
Your morning roundup for May 19, the day Stanley the adult baby entered the nation's political dialogue, and not a moment too soon. Video via College Baseball Daily....

Matthew Barnaby Broke Down His Wife's Door, Used Racial Slurs, According To Criminal Complaint
Matthew Barnaby pleaded not guilty to five charges, including a felony, stemming from an incident with his estranged wife and her male companion....

Here's Video Of Matthew Barnaby Leaving Jail And A Statement From His Agent
After his arrest and not-guilty plea to charges stemming from a "domestic incident," an agent for ESPN hockey analyst Matthew Barnaby issued a statement on behalf of his client. Here it is:...

ESPN: It's "Inappropriate For Us To Comment" On ESPN Analyst Matthew Barnaby's "Domestic Incident" Arrest
According to a story posted on ESPN.com just after 2:30 p.m. eastern today, ESPN the network declined comment on "ESPN analyst and former NHL veteran" Matthew Barnaby spending the night in jail, as mentioned in a morning post here....

The Grizzlies Were Prince To The Thunder's Morris Day Last Night
Your morning roundup for May 14, the day after a homeless Bulgarian man beheaded an elderly British woman in a Spanish supermarket, walked away "clutching the head by its hair, leaving a trail of blood dripping to the ground," but got caught after an Italian motorcyclist threw a helmet at his face....

We Are All Dave McKenna XCVIII
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit takes a torpedo to the ammunition hold....

Bernard Hopkins Promotes Upcoming Fight By Calling Donovan McNabb A House Negro
Not long ago, HBO aired a promo for Bernard Hopkins vs. Jean Pascal in which the brassy tongued Hopkins verbally mauled his Haitian opponent. Unfortunately, HBO wasn't present when Hopkins lost his mind yesterday and voiced some astounding opinions about Donovan McNabb. Good thing Hopkins voiced the...

What's Really Special About This Picture Is That Chipper Jones May Have Signed A 7-Inch Sperm Replica
The first weekend of baseball season wouldn't be complete without an "Atlanta Braves Chipper Jones Sperm Autograph" available to the highest bidder. As of 11 a.m., there were zero takers on the starting bid of $1. Fine, it's not authenticated, but this is still shocking when you consider that there...

Abusive Relationships Are The Talk Of New York Baseball
It's not enough for Yankees GM Brian Cashman to let the Mets wallow in the fact that they're the Mets. No, he just had to call them out for abusing "left-handed specialist" Pedro Feliciano last year....
