nab Page 22 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Donovan McNabb Has A Weak Constitution
Amazingly, Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb did this before Buccaneers kicker Matt Bryant kicked a 62-yard field goal — with room to spare! — to beat his team yesterday....

Poker? We Barely Even Know Her! (Sorry.)
We haven't had any Anna Benson updates for a while, mainly because her husband is in baseball purgatory in Baltimore, they haven't made a divorce announcement in a few months and her handlers have apparently asked her to slow down on the slaughter of bunnies and other adorable animals....

As Much As It Hurts, We Have To Accept That It's Over
Well, now that the dust has settled a bit, now that we've all had time to collect ourselves, rest up, sleep it off and compose ourselves ... we think we're ready to dig back into the Anna Benson divorce story....

The Day The Music Died
Each generation has its cultural touchstones, those moments when everyone remembers where they were, at that specific moment, from that second until the day that they die. Late at night, at a dinner party or social function, someone will mention the event, and the party will hush, and recollections ...

You Know She's Getting Her Own Show Within A Year
For those of you who don't plan on using tonight's night off from major sporting events to, you know, heading outside or perhaps conversing with loved ones, you should know that tonight, everyone's favorite Not Really That Attractive But Unusually Loud baseball wife Anna Benson will be appearing o...

Anna Benson on Fox News. It Had To Happen Sometime.
Anna Benson, who I believe has had her own teeth surgically replaced by those of Andre the Giant, did an interview on the Fox News channel on Thursday. It creeps me out in a variety of ways. Her gigantic smile is just one of them....

Do Not Mess With Anna Benson And Her Guns
What's the best post-Christmas present we could receive? How about a brand new batch of crazy from Anna Benson's Web site. She has redesigned the puppy, with all kinds of new links like "Ask Anna Anything" and "Heavy Petting." (There's also this picture, next to the disturbing caption, "Got Milk, ...

Kris Benson Wonders Where It All Went Wrong
All right, so here's the situation. You're a middle-of-the-rotation starter whose team is trying to trade him. You're a former first overall pick who parlayed one good season into a multi-million-dollar deal. You are married to a woman who is attractive, but not as attractive as she so desperately...

PETA's Super Bowl Shuffle
According to the New York Post, the fine folks at PETA are putting together an commercial for the Super Bowl that will involved female models "'flashing' the camera, and when they lift their shirt, they will have prosthetic udders over their breasts." Ignoring the fact that this is almost, letter ...

Owens Has Plenty Of Time To Party
Tomorrow night, in Atlantic City, N.J. — "we're like Vegas, only, you know, with more cutoff T-shirts with "I'm With Stupid" printed on them" — former Eagles wide receiver Terrell Owens will celebrate his 32nd birthday. ESPN's Chris Mortensen reported that invitations were left in Eagles players' ...

Anna Benson Will Fight For Her Right For Fur
While doing some followup "research" after yesterday's Anna Benson dustup, we came across her official Web site, and, more specifically, her angry "Letter To Peta" found at the bottom of the site's front page. (It's one of them fancy Flash sites, so we can't link you here. Just go there and check ...

Anna Benson Is MAKING NEWS!
All right, so yes, she is attractive, though she's starting to veer a little close to that, "OK, we get it, you're hot, please stop it now," territory. Mets wife lady Anna Benson is piping up again, this time to blast the Mets for considering trading her man. The reason for the trade talks, she sa...

Until Next Year, Donovan
The news just broke, if it can be counting as "news" or "breaking:" Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb will miss the rest of the season after having surgery on his hernia, a surgery that sounds deeply unpleasant all kinds of thoughts here, not the least of which that by the time McNabb plays again,...

Authors With Pure Hearts: Jere Longman
It has been brought to our attention that, as much as people might like our Why Your Hometown Columnist Sucks feature, sometimes it's nice to point out good sportswriting. We agree; we're very friendly people and love great sportswriting as much, if not more, than anyone. Henceforth, we introduce ou...

The Woe Of The Eagles Fan
There was a moment last night, during the Eagles' season-crushing 21-20 loss to the Cowboys, when you really grasped just how difficult it must be to be an Eagles fan. Ordinarily, we scoff when fans of successful teams complain about their suffering; we root for the Arizona freaking Cardinals, so ...

Rosenhaus Sets T.O.'s Career Ablaze
One pretty amazing press conference involving Terrell Owens this afternoon. Owens came out and made a seemingly sincere statement, apologizing to his fans, the Eagles, Andy Reid, Donovan McNabb, the owners, pretty much everybody but Jeff Garcia. We were watching it thinking, "Man, he actually see...

That's All For T.O.
Making the unofficial officially official, Eagles coach Andy Reid announced a few minutes ago that Terrell Owens will not play for the Eagles again this season....

T.O. Just Nukes 'Em All
Honestly, we don't know why athletes even give interviews anymore. Philadelphia Eagles poo-stirrer Terrell Owens, after being asked about ESPN moron Michael Irvin's comment that the Eagles would be undefeated with Brett Favre as quarterback instead of Donovan McNabb, responded with:...

NFL Roundup: Party Para Mexico
• We're a little slow this morning, because did a shot every time ESPN showed some Mexican "culture" during last night's 31-14 Buzzsaw victory over the 49ers. We know it's unusual to play a game in another country, but the slack-jawed awe of the broadcasters last night — "look, another local! Thes...