ned Page 48 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Baboon Steals TV Cameraman's Lunch At The Nedbank Golf Challenge In South Africa
Many golf courses around the world are known for their treacherous hazards: the Island Green at TPC-Sawgrass, the 18th on the Blue Monster at Doral, the Road Hole at St. Andrews....

College ShameDay: Who Embarrassed Themselves Over The Holiday Weekend (Besides Indiana)?
Our weekly college football shame index. ...

Dear Fireman Ed: F-U-C-K Off! Off! Off!
In case you missed it, unofficial Jets mascot Fireman Ed, whose claim to fame is going to Jets games and spelling one word very loudly, "retired" yesterday. And the best part is that he retired because people at the stadium were just too darn mean to him:...

Ben Roethlisberger Spawned
According to the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, Ben Roethlisberger announced on his website that he and his wife, Ashley, whom he did not meet in the bathroom of some college bar, had a son at 10:06 p.m. yesterday. It's a seven-pound, one-ounce baby boy, and his name is Benjamin Roethlisberger Jr. No word...

This Awful Statue May End Up Getting The TCU Student-Body President Impeached
This is supposed to be TCU's "SuperFrog" mascot, though it looks more like Sonic the Hedgehog waiting patiently for a crosstown bus. The student-body president is in a bit of trouble now that it's emerged that the school's student government never actually voted on the hideous thing. Did we mention ...

The Late-October Best Picture Oscars Predictions You've Been Waiting For
Coverage of the Oscars has reached tail-wagging-dog proportions in recent years: Rather than an awards show looking back at a year of films and choosing the best of them, the Academy Awards have become the journey and the destination. Not only do movies exist solely to win Oscars, but there are whol...

Texas Tech And TCU Combine For 37 Points After The End Of The Fourth Quarter, But Texas Tech Comes Out Ahead
Texas Tech and TCU combined to score 109 points in an incredible game that took a solid four hours and saw a hundred or so lead changes. After excellent individual performances from Texas Tech QB Seth Doege, TCU WR Skye Dawson, TCU Kicker Jaden Oberkrom (who went an icy 11/11 on field goals and ex...

The Zinedine Zidane Headbutt Statue Is A Powerful Homage To French Defeat
You've probably heard by now that France - a country that Lady Liberty would tell you knows from great statues - has unveiled one of the world's finest tributes to tantrums. The pair of 16-foot resin figures outside the Pompidou Center depict everyone's favorite soccer violence blooper: Zinedine Zid...

Yes, It's Almost Time For Hockey. No, There's No Hockey. Deadspin Tries To Explain.
Wait, did something happen to hockey?...

Billy Gillispie Has Resigned As Texas Tech's Basketball Coach
You already knew he wouldn't be back, and now the official word out of Lubbock is that Gillispie—recently hospitalized for high blood pressure and stress—wants to focus on his health. The Red Raiders went 1-17 in the Big 12 in his lone season in charge (two years removed from his spectacular flameou...
![Astros Pitcher Mickey Storey Knocked Out Of Game After Taking Line Drive To The Face [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17z09biichg32jpg.jpg)
Astros Pitcher Mickey Storey Knocked Out Of Game After Taking Line Drive To The Face [UPDATE]
A bad season for Houston got even worse tonight as rookie Astros pitcher Mickey Storey was knocked out of tonight's game on a play eerily similar to the one that left A's pitcher Brandon McCarthy with a fractured skull last week....

The Existential Farce Of A Royals Pitching Change
I believe there is a hell, and it's always early September there. Your team is long out of playoff contention, forever playing out the string, yet the season never ends. Just meaningless game after meaningless game, and football is supposed to start soon, but it never comes. The game goes to extra i...

High-Ranking Catholic Priest Has Some Horrifying Thoughts About Seductive Teens And "Poor" Jerry Sandusky
Andrew Sullivan brings us this incredible quote from Father Benedict Groeschel, who is the director of the Office for Spiritual Development for the Catholic Archdiocese of New York:...

ESPN Prepping Its Talent For A Twitter Shitstorm After Deciding To No Longer Air Must-Watch Games On ESPN3
The Protean identity of ESPN's online network ESPN3 shifts again this week, as the former ESPN360 attempts to distance itself from similar offering WatchESPN. The Worldwide Leader has elected to end the simulcast of sporting events shown on ESPN's cable nets to ESPN3—a service available to 73 milli...

Yankees Pitcher Michael Pineda Arrested On DUI Charges
Yankees pitcher Michael Pineda was arrested on suspicion of DUI in Tampa at 2:35 a.m. today. Police say he had a .128 blood alcohol content....

Melky Cabrera Cooked Up A Phony Website To Try To Beat His Suspension
The New York Daily News has discovered that in an effort to beat the rap on his 50-game suspension, Melky and his "associates" devised a scheme that included purchasing a website for $10,000, making this website appear to sell a fake product and pretending Melky purchased and used the product, unaw...

A List Of Every NHL Team Not Yet Linked To Shane Doan
As promised, a full and comprehensive list of every NHL team that hasn't surfaced as a potential landing spot for veteran free agent winger Shane Doan:...

Minor League Football Organization Bans Two Players For Life After On-Field Brawl
The Northern Elite Football League (not to be confused with minor league football competitor New England Football League) banned two players for life after a nasty brawl broke out in Eau Claire, Wisconsin between the Lake Superior Rage and Eau Claire Crush....

What Happened To John Van Benschoten? The Former Pirates Pitching Prospect Laments The Hitting Career He Never Had
John Van Benschoten, the Pirates' first-round pick (eighth overall) in 2001, didn't have a good big-league career. In 90 innings of work spread over three seasons, Van Benschoten, mostly as a starter, racked up 65 strikeouts against 68 walks and a 9.20 ERA. We ranked him 76th on our list of the 100...

I'm Worried About Quentin Tarantino's <em>Django Unchained</em>
It'd be difficult to find a bigger Quentin Tarantino fanboy than I am. It's a little embarrassing, actually; I was one of those nerds posting on alt.fans.tarantino dorkboards the year Justin Bieber was born. (The fact that Google archives Usenet forums from 20 years ago is just cruel.) I think Jacki...