nf Page 1216 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Don't Burn Your Vick Jersey Just Yet
We hope you already own a Michael Vick jersey and haven't burned it, because it's about to become a rarity....
Maybe You Don't Want Bonds' Home Run Ball
Imagine, hypothetically, that you were the one to catch Barry Bonds' 756th home run ball. It's not gonna be worth as much as it would have been a few years ago — you see, Barry Bonds has done a shitload of steroids, and many don't like that — but it still might, say, pay for a semester of college. (...
Vick Pleads Not Guilty To Dogfighting Charges
Mark your calendars on Nov. 26 for the start of the most captivating dead dog/quarterback melodrama in legal history. Our Man Mexico has plead not guilty to the big charges. Trial begins November 26. What are the odds he'll play by then? We say they're low....
NFL Season Preview: Miami Dolphins
Believe it or not, folks, the NFL season is much closer than you can possibly imagine. So close, in fact, that, if we're going to fit in every NFL team preview by the start of the season, running one every weekday, we have to start this week. So there you have it....
Deion Sanders Finds Dogfighting Quite Exciting, Actually
Via The Fanhouse, it appears Deion Sanders has a few choice things to say about Michael Vick and his alleged dogfighting. And, if you don't mind us saying, we believe Deion Sanders might be completely insane....
You Cannot Destroy Priest Holmes
Of all the possible ways for a retired athlete to deal with the crushing blow of realizing that the only skill he's ever possessed is suddenly beyond his grasp, we supposed an "ill-fated comeback attempt" is above "winning 'Dancing With The Stars'" ... but just barely....
Time To Agonize Over Your Fantasy Team Name
We are officially ready to start thinking about fantasy football, we think. As always, we're in too many leagues for us to keep track of, particularly because we consistently make the mistake of naming all our teams the same thing: Mattoon Green Wave. This is not only uncreative, but also incredibly...
NFL Season Preview: Carolina Panthers
Believe it or not, folks, the NFL season is much closer than you can possibly imagine. So close, in fact, that, if we're going to fit in every NFL team preview by the start of the season, running one every weekday, we have to start this week. So there you have it....
Will Everyone Be Out To Get Vick?
Our man Mr. Mexico might never make it back on an NFL field again, but if he does, he might find that he needs to be extra elusive. Not only are opposing dog-loving players going to be digging in to knock the guy into the nearest kennel, but even his own teammates might not have his back....
Ikea Loveseats Are Bulky And Difficult To Move
I was perusing Sports by Brooks late last night, as is my wont, and came across this item: "The NEW YORK TIMES reports EA Sports will provide new President Peter Moore with "relocation-related expenses" from Redmond, Washington, to Redwood City, California. The move will cost the company $330,000. M...
Leinart's Life Turning Into Slightly More Boring Episode Of "Maury"
Matt Leinart would like you to know: His baby momma be buggin'. Ahem. That is to say: He respectfully disagrees with Brynn Cameron's assessment that he's never around as a father. Actually, not all that respectfully....
Burn, Vick Jersey, BURN
We know this is usually on Chandler's Minor Enterprise beat, but it's Tuesday, and that doesn't run until Friday. So we're grabbing it: The minor league baseball world is capitalizing on Mr. Mexico's troubles....
Jeff Pearlman, On His Subject Barry Bonds
Barry Bonds remains just two homers away from Hank Aaron's record, and in the wake of this historic and confounding achievement, we felt we should talk to a guy who knows the life of Bonds better than anyone else in the media: Jeff Pearlman, Bonds' biographer in Love Me, Hate Me. We've interviewed...
NFL Season Preview: Cincinnati Bengals
Believe it or not, folks, the NFL season is much closer than you can possibly imagine. So close, in fact, that, if we're going to fit in every NFL team preview by the start of the season, running one every weekday, we have to start this week. So there you have it....
You Had A Bucket? Luxury!
Who among us hasn't locked their young child in his room with a loaf of bread and a bucket and then gone off to watch the Packers at an Indian casino? (Long pause). Um, anyone? Cripes, this is embarrassing....
Will We Ever See Vick Play Again?
Allow us to make a small prediction: After NFL commissioner Roger Goodell's decision to ban Michael Vick from training camp yesterday, effectively putting him in an odd purgatory of not being suspended but not being allowed to play either, we will never see Michael Vick play a game for the Atlanta F...
Selig Won't Watch, But We'll Have To
Well, if that whole Barry Bonds Won't Play On ESPN thing turns out to be based in reality, we're all in luck; Bonds is never going to break Hank Aaron's record. Because everyone of his at-bats is gonna be on The Worldwide Leader until, well, until he breaks it, or dies. So, you know, enjoy....
NFL Season Preview: Minnesota Vikings
Believe it or not, folks, the NFL season is much closer than you can possibly imagine. So close, in fact, that, if we're going to fit in every NFL team preview by the start of the season, running one every weekday, we have to start today. So there you have it....
Why Can't They Just Leave Poor Michael Vick Alone?
Well, now that legal expert Emmitt Smith has weighed in on the Michael Vick situation — saying the feds are just leaning on Vick to get "to everyone else," though we're trying to figure out who's more involved that the guy who slammed a dog into the ground until he died, we can wrap the whole matte...