nfl Page 1000 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
It's 40 Percent More Joe Buck, Every Sunday
Joe Buck haters, it is a dark day for you. Remember how much difficulty you had withstanding Joe for three hours a Sunday during the NFL season? Well, that's about to be increased by two hours. Every Sunday....
Vince Papale's Wife Doesn't Care About Black People
There are always perils when you make a movie based on the life of a real person. Real life tends to not follow the inspiring storyline. A Beautiful Mind's John Nash might have been anti-Semetic. The heroic bounty hunter in Domino killed herself right before the movie was released. The cute love s...
Make Your Pretend Person Lift Pretend Weights
Obviously, we're as excited about the release of Madden 2007 as anybody else, but we'll confess something: We're not as into the role-playing aspects of the game as some apparently are. We'll play exhibition games against our friends — as the Buzzsaw, of course — and if we're feeling frisky, we'll p...
Raccoons On Reign Of Terror
Most any parent with an older teenaged child knows the drill. First comes that phone call at midnight from a downtown police precinct, notifying you that there has been a mishap with your car. Then comes the question: How did our son/daughter get the keys? Now the Tennessee Titans front office can r...
New Home For The Buzzsaw Debuts
It has always been insane that the Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals, an NFL team, for crying out loud, has spent the last 16 years playing in a college team's stadium. Only the Buzzsaw would rent out a subpar Pac-10 team's field....
Madden Player Ratings Are Out, If You're Into That Type Of Thing
We are just 11 days away from the release of Madden 07, and the fine folks at IGN, for the real diehards out there, have released the rosters and player ratings of everyone in the game. Looking at our Buzzsaw, we see, as usual, two of the three best players are the kicker and the punter....
Stay Angry, San Diego
We'll confess: In the genre of "having Iraqi child hold sign of American popular culture phenomenon that he likely doesn't understand but, by bringing thoughts of a frivolous pursuit into an area that is anything but frivolous, will make a fun point of humor for friends of family back home, allowing...
Can't Break Her Steelers Habit
This picture, which ran in today's Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, makes us happy in a way we can't quite put our finger on....
Deion Sanders Says "No Snitching"
There are all kinds of reasons to be annoyed by Deion Sanders. Here's a more damning one: He asked a woman whose daughter was allegedly raped not to file a police report....
Look, There's A Writer In That Thar Camp
Writer Stefan Fatsis is the author of Word Freak, an incredibly entertaining book about Scrabble. (He's also a writer for The Wall Street Journal. Right now, apparently, he's writing a book about training camp, and he's spending it saving the Broncos from an hour or so of sprints and boring meetings...
Reggie Bush Might Beat Your Ass In A Mall
The fine folks at TMZ, after months of accosting celebrities as they drunkenly walked out of clubs, finally had their breakthrough last week with the Mel Gibson "sugar tits" story, which not only horrified Jews and Gentiles alike, but also ruined a classic pickup line forever. They're all over the p...
New NFL Commissioner Somehow Looks Like Less Of A Dork
In case you missed the live-blogging of the whole gripping experience yesterday, the NFL owners elected Roger Goodell their new commissioner yesterday, making him the third commissioner of the league in the last 46 years. (We can't believe that's true, by the way; there have been more popes, for cry...
"Interests: Redskins, Clubs And GETTIN' DRUNK"
It just wouldn't be the NFL without some truly obsessed, frightening fans, and we've got some pretty worthy ones in the Dead Tree Crew, backers of the Washington Redskins and almost certainly the type of guys who beat up Daniel Snyder in high school....
You Got Neil Rackers, Yo
All right, so we know this isn't real, and we know it's just an NFL promotional video (for a product we don't use; we prefer Yahoo for our all fantasy games, to be honest with you), but we still could not resist....
Live Blogging People Walking Through Hotels
The guy right here is Roger Goodell, who is very likely to become the next commissioner of the NFL, perhaps as early as today. In the past, discussions concerning the new commissioner were contentious; Paul Tagliabue himself was the product of an ugly power play that pushed out the late Jim Finks....
At This Point, They Should Probably Just Have A Lockup Near Camp
What more can we tell you: Another Bengal got arrested. This time it was Bootsy Collins favoite left guard Eric Steinbach, who was arrested for operating a boat under the influence on Saturday night. He was, in fact, in the water at the time, though we admit it would be funnier if he weren't. He i...
Go Toward The Light, Emmitt
You thought that finishing his career flat on the turf of Sun Devil Stadium was the most embarassing final image of all-time rushing champ Emmitt Smith one could come up with....
Do NOT Mess With This Woman
We have always assumed that if a woman were to end up breaking through to compete on the highest professional athletic level, it would not be as a kicker, as has often been tried: It would be as a knuckleball pitcher in baseball. It doesn't hinge on strength, endurance or speed; it just requires pra...
Oxnard Must Be An Entertaining Camp
Few athletes give us more joy, in a "Jeez, look how far this idiot has fallen" type of way, than former Eagles dope Freddie Mitchell. Last time we checked in with him, he was considering offers from Jon Bon Jovi's team in the Arena League....