nfl Page 828 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Mike Vick Will Keep Being Best Quarterback In Universe Ever On Sunday, Usually Illogical Coach Declares
Somebody grab a tin bucket and a bag of sawdust because I'm about to puke excitement all over this page. Andy Reid, more stubborn than the most stubborn hanging toenail on the stubbornest toe, has apparently had his head surgically removed from his big red ass and is starting...MIKE VICK THIS SUNDAY...
The Jets Introduced A Car Service For Players The Week Before Braylon Edwards's DUI
As pointed out this morning (and ReTweeted by Peter King — cats and dogs living together, mass hysteria), the most galling thing about Edwards driving drunk is the sheer number of alternatives. Here's another one: the Jets provide free cars and drivers....
You Catch A Helmet At A Football Game, You Get Yourself A Radio Interview
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the guy who caught Brandon Jacobs's helmet....
Wealthy Jets Receiver Braylon Edwards Gets Pinched For DWI In City With Most Cabs Ever
After being stopped by police for driving erratically and blowing twice the legal limit, chinbeard enthusiast Braylon Edwards was charged with DWI Tuesday. The Jets, who have a car service for partying players, were astonished someone actually drove in Manhattan. [Daily News]...
After Enough Time Had Passed, Cousin Itt Finally Forgave Them For Imploding The Vet
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
This Should Have Been The NFL's Concussion Poster
Our friends at 12 Angry Mascots have announced a winner in their contest to redesign the NFL's concussion awareness poster. This is the best; honorable mentions inside....
Notes On "Campdick": A Former NFLer On Ines Sainz And Locker-Room Sexual Tension
A babe reporter walks into a locker room. Catcalls ensue; jock straps fly; penises shrivel. She doesn't understand the words, but she understands the sexual tension. It's palpable when an attractive woman appears. Palpable. Players call it campdick....
Embracing The Dog Killer: Michael Vick Is The Best Football Player In The Universe Ever
Last August I interrupted a weeknight of carousing to go home and write about my hometown Eagles' signing of Michael Vick because I was just so dumbfounded by the move. My headline was "JESUS FUCKING CHRIST." It's more apt now....
Your NFL Late Games Open Thread
So, Patriots LB Jerod Mayo said Darrelle Revis might be faking his injury and QB Mark Sanchez "looks to run before he looks to throw." [NY Post] Meanwhile, Sanchez says, "we're ready to have a breakout game." [ESPN.com]...
Plaxico Burress Talks About Being in Prison, Doesn't Seem to Like It
The New York Daily News spared no hokey imagery in bringing America the long-awaited "Hey, I wonder how Plaxico Burress feels after almost a year of being locked up" story today....
Your NFL Early Games Open Thread
Of the nine early games, I'm most interested in finding out whether Michael Vick gets three touchdowns by arm and two by foot, or two by arm and three by foot....
Mike Singletary Doesn't Much Like Talking
Mike Singletary's team got smoked by Seattle opening week and some rat 49er fink told Yahoo Sports! the team's losing faith in offensive coordinator Jimmy Raye....
Armed Lions Fan Makes Creepy Video About Hunting Eagles
Sure, it's great that the Detroit Lions have fans passionate enough to make YouTube videos about their upcoming games like this week's against Philly. It's still kind of jarring to get a behind-the-scenes look at how militias form....
Joe Torre Quits on the Dodgers
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
John Harbaugh: God Makes Foolish The Wisdom Of The World (Specifically, Vegas Point Spreads)
"Where is the wise man?" John Harbaugh asks his team. "Where is the scholar? Where is the philosopher of this age? Does God not make foolish the wisdom of this world? That's what He did tonight, because we're the Ravens."...
In Calvin Johnson's Version Of Events, The Referee Talks Like Kanye West
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Detroit Lion and pass dropper Calvin Johnson....
Lions Cheerleaders Not Allowed To Be Lions Cheerleaders
Following the lead of just about every other team, Detroit has finally brought in some spirit. A few caveats: they're not allowed to cheer, and they're not allowed to be affiliated with the Detroit Lions. You're doing it wrong....
A Former Player Discusses Concussions, And If It Was Worth It
Do yourself a favor and read this account from a former NFLer on the toll concussions took — and continue to take — on his body and brain....
Steve Mariucci Eats Hog
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....
Matt Forte Put A Bun In The Wrong Oven
Forte's fiancée dumped him after learning that his ex-girlfriend is seven months pregnant with his child. It worked for Brady! [Sun-Times]...