nfl Page 850 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Marshawn Lynch Is All About The Jacksons
We thought quiet little Buffalo would be good for the troubled Lynch. We thought wrong, as the RB couldn't avoid the criminal breeding grounds of the T.G.I. Friday's at the mall, where he's accused of stealing $20 from a woman....

NFC Wild Card Open Thread: Eagles-Cowboys
"We had Mike McMahon. We had Rodney Peete and Ty Detmer and who was the kid from Ohio? Bobby Hoying!...For 10 years, we've had no quarterback problems — none. Where are people's memories?" So sayeth Pennsylvania Gov. Ed Rendell. Discuss....

AFC Wild Card Open Thread: Jets-Bengals
The Bengals are angry about something or other. The Jets are angry about something or other, too, despite being heavily favored to win the Super Bowl, according to the Rex Ryan Sports Book and Bingo Parlor. Discuss in the comments....

Seahawks Shack Up With Pete Carroll As If He Were A Grad Student Living In Malibu
Pete Carroll has come to terms with Seattle, according to the stuffed animals at Adam Schefter's tea party. He'll be introduced just as soon as the Seahawks find a minority in whom to feign interest. [ESPN]...

Pats Owner Just Wants To Watch The World Burn
Tough week for Robert Kraft. First his truckload of illegal immigrants gets pulled over on its way to shovel the stadium. Now his driver gets ticketed for refusing to move Kraft's ride when a fire truck needed to get through....

Seahawks About To Land Pete Carroll?
"Pete Carroll is the guy Seahawks are targeting. It is expected to happen," according to Chris Mortensen's imaginary friends. [@mortreport, LAT]...

BREAKING: Jim Mora Fired
Jay Glazer just tweeted the news a couple minutes ago. And Glazer is blissfully never wrong. I've always thought Jim Mora 2 looks like an Eskimo. That's probably a wrong assumption....

Chin Blossoms: Buffalonians Begin The Cowher Chase In Earnest
Raiders, Bengals and Bears fans have all purchased billboards calling for their teams to clean house in the front office. But those are angry, angry cities. The salt-of-the-earth folk in Upstate New York prefer more constructive advice on their roadsides....

Your State Of The Buzzsaw Address
For the second consecutive year, I'm heading to the Pink Taco in Glendale for playoff game hosted by The Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals. I'm not sure enough people appreciate how strange that is....

The Rich Gannon Hissy Fit Gets Hissier
Gannon The Cannon offers the Raiders his help. Team responds by opining that he's the one who needs help. Now, now, children. You're both right. (Ed note: We will always use this photo for Gannon posts.) [Oakland Tribune]...

Patriots Workers Stopped In Immigration Sting
Gillette Stadium hired dozens of workers to shovel snow from the field, and apparently had them sent in from Guatemala, by way of Rhode Island....

The 2009 Oakland Raiders: A Season Of Failure
The Oakland Raiders were once a proud, victorious franchise, but despite zero ownership changes in over 30 years they become an organization synonymous with "ineptitude." The 2009 campaign didn't reverse this spectacular descent....

Children Will Crush Your Playoff Dreams. The Wild Card Jamboroo
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....

Star Spitting Is Worst Thing To Happen In Dallas Since Kennedy Assassination
An Eagles fan/employee "defiled" Cowboys Stadium with a vicious (and viscous) attack on the city of Dallas, football fans, and basic human decency. He spit on the star at midfield. Twice. Hey, that artificial turf is expensive to steam clean!...

Last Night's Winner: The Kansas City Patriots
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Patriots fans who love everything about New England's recent dynasty, except Bill Belichick and Tom Brady. Pack your bags, you're moving to K.C.!...

In Other Ex-NFLer Car-Related Legal Trouble...
After his dealership defaulted, Deuce McAllister is countersuing, claiming Nissan's finance division should have known he "was a football player who was inexperienced in the car business." Deuce, I'm pretty sure that's why they sold you the dealership. [AP]...

The Pansiest Auto Theft Charge Ever
Terry Glenn rented an SUV from National Car Rental. Terry Glenn did not return said SUV. That's grounds for arrest, and not likely to earn much street cred....

Charlie Weis Beaches Himself In Kansas City
Weis will be the Chiefs' offensive coordinator, according to Chris Mortensen's imaginary friends. [ESPN]...

Mike Ditka Was Not A Fan Of Post-Game Interviews Or Pants
Behind the scenes post-game video, circa 1988, shows a young, spry Coach Ditka bickering with the host and generally being, well....Mike Ditka. Fascinating artifact. (Bad language, but thankfully no Mini Ditka revealed.) [Kap's Korner, via]...

Charles Rogers Just Can't Quit Drinking Himself To Sleep
Former Detroit/MSU receiver Charles Rogers was arrested again, this time for falling asleep in a Mexican restaurant at 3:15 p.m. on Tuesday. Maybe he has narcolepsy. (Caused by too much alcohol.)...