nfl Page 894 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Cowboys Have Fallen And They Can't Get Up
As the Eagles celebrated a few doors away, Tony Romo was discovering that no amount of soap and water could wash away the smell of yet another December failure. He even collapsed in the shower while trying....
Brett Favre Ruins AFC East For Everybody
Brett Favre threw his team's playoff chances right into the arms of the Miami Dolphins, giving them the AFC East title while keeping the 11-5 New England Patriots out of the playoffs....
The Cowboys Apologize in Advance for Any Illusion of Competition
The Dallas Cowboys have fallen behind by... let's see now... 312098398219031-3 at the end of the third. Baltimore and Miami continue to battle for the remaining AFC spots....
And Wayne Fontes Thought Perfection Was 8-8
The Detroit Lions showed true devotion to the perfectly awful cause today while the rest of the NFL North showed why they should consider CFL applications. Or maybe KFC applications....
Anyone Get the Number of That Cadillac?
Ben Roethlisberger leaves with concussion. Payback for spreading hate?...
Former NFL Player Arrested for Alleged Rape of High School Student
The recently-former coach of the Walpole (MA) High state champion football team and former NFL player turned himself in to authorities in Tuscon after being accused of raping a Walpole High student-athlete....
Natural and Unnatural Disasters Threaten Week 17 (Yes, That Includes Detroit)
Weather threatens in Buffalo and Houston (despite the dome), Detroit threatens to actually play, and Ed Hochuli threatens to be mentioned no less than 87 times tonight....
It's Hard to Ride Off Into the Sunset on the West Coast
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Guess Who?
Guess who kept the coin from the final coin flip at Texas Stadium? Hint: He's a former Cowboy and he likes to collect shiny things. [Dallas Morning News]...
The Punk, Crybaby, Diabetic Quarterback That Is Jay Cutler
Chargers linebacker Matt Wilhelm is an authority on punks. (He played with Maurice Clarett at Ohio State, so his field credentials on the matter are solid)....
Tom Brady Is Engaged!
TMZ is reporting that invalid quarterback Tom Brady, who dumped his hot pregnant actress girlfriend for less pregnant supermodel Gisele Bundchen, is now affianced to said supermodel, thereby taking his golden ass off the market....
The Definition Of A Slow News Week
Minnesota Vikings safety Darren Sharper visited a TV station in the middle of the night and parked in a handicapped spot. That is all. [Star-Tribune]...
Former Bronco Says He Played While High In 2007
Former Broncos left tackle Matt Lepsis said he played the first six games of his last season in football under the influence of drugs. Lepsis, who retired at the end of last season, never failed a drug test during his 11 years in the NFL, but says he practiced that way 10 to 15 times before actually...
NFL Secret Santa! Jamboroo, Week 17
Drew's Jamboroo runs every Thursday. Buy his book here. Email Drew here. Read him at KSK....
Plaxico Burress And The Hidden Arms Cache
In a daring midnight raid on the home of New York militia leader Plaxico Burress, police officers uncovered a secret "cache" of weapons and ammunition that he was undoubtedly saving for the revolution....
Roger Goodell Fiercely Guards His Snow Domain
First was the Wes Welker snow angel incident and now this; Jets' Shaun Ellis fined $10,000 for throwing snowballs. [NBCSports]...
How To Make An 0-15 Season Suddenly More Meaningful
This whole Robert Parker/Rod Marinelli press conference situation has suddenly turned a beleaguered, not-so-good coach into a sympathetic character for the last game of a uniquely pathetic Lions season. It's kind of awesome isn't it?...
Which NFL Coaches Will Be Unemployed Next Week?
There was a time, not that long ago, when the Jets were on top of the world and area fans were seriously considering an all-Jersey Super Bowl. Boy, those were the days....
And The Lieutenant Governor Could Be Mini Ditka
I'd like to think that the current Mike Ditka for Governor of Illinois movement isn't just a scheme to sell T-shirts and coffee mugs, but I'm not so sure. Just look at their site....
The 49ers, Wacky Mustaches, David Letterman And You
The 49ers and Raiders have had pretty horrific seasons, but the Bay Area franchises couldn't be handling their lack of success more differently....