nfl Page 907 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Larry Johnson Makes a Solemn Vow to Not Become Ike Turner
Chiefs running back Larry Johnson was deactivated again this week and addressed his latest lady-pestering incident with the media yesterday and seemed surprisingly contrite. We're so used to seeing troubled athletes mumble through scripted apologies for the sake of their career, it's a little jarrin...
'100 Percent Cheese Free' Apparently Not 100 Percent Nut Free
Meet Syd Davy, better known to Minnesota Vikings fans at 100 Percent Cheese Free (it's Rip The Packers Day, I guess). He was the subject of our About Last Night Wakeup Image this morning, and as promised here's an explanation as to what he was doing at the Patriots-Broncos Monday Night game. Don Cha...
Browns Suspend Kellen Winslow For Defending His Testicles
Can a team suspend a player for defending his own nether region? It appears that's exactly what the Cleveland Browns are doing with Kellen Winslow, and excuse me if I call them on their bullshit. On Monday Cleveland suspended Winslow for one game for "unwarranted, inappropriate, and unnecessarily di...
It's Obama And McCain ... AFTER DARK!
So over the weekend, the two candidates for President — Sen. Barack Obama, head of a Muslim sleeper cell, and Sen. John McCain, organizer of the first Hanoi chapter of the Ku Klux Klan — spoke at the Al Smith Dinner, a big Catholic charity event held in Manhattan right before the elections every y...
Switching Mikes In Midstream, The 49er Way
Well, here is your new face of the San Francisco 49ers. Initial thoughts? Aside from being totally hyp-no-tized, I have to say that it really couldn't be any worse than the old one. There was perhaps no coach in the NFL one wanted to see succeed more than Mike Nolan — really, has anyone ever had a b...
The Rather Remarkable Self Destruction Of Larry Johnson
Details continue to come out concerning Chiefs running back Larry Johnson and an altercation with a woman at a Kansas City nightclub on Oct. 10, and it's interesting, if depressing, reading. Already scheduled to appear in court on Dec. 3 on an assault charge for pushing a woman at a nightclub, Johns...
Um, What The Hell, Patriots Fans?
Sorry to start your day off on the wrong foot, but several people have sent this in; a fan at the Monday Night game in Foxboro last night purportedly wearing blackface. I guess that's what this is — a closer shot is shown following the jump — although I'm no expert on such matters. Would Ted Danson ...
Jay Cutler Out to Prove his Arm is Bigger Than His Mouth
Tonight, the Denver Broncos and mouthy quarterback Jay Cutler swagger into Foxboro and will attempt to frustrate the completely neutralized New England Patriots on their home field. Even though the Pats do not remotely resemble anything close to the juggernaut they were last year, they're still favo...
The $400,000 New York Jets Tickets
Hey, Jets fans! Are you excited about the new Meadowlands stadium opening in 2010? Are you also an obscenely rich business tycoon in a recession-proof industry and lacking all economic conscience? Then you are in luck—or you were—when it comes to securing a seat in the new stadium. Unlike the Giants...
Favre-Packers Divorce Is Getting Downright Messy
So do you have a problem that you would like Brett Favre to solve? Girlfriend trouble? Confused about which laundry detergent to buy? Hang by your phone, and Brett will be with you momentarily. But first he has to solve the problems of the NFL, like advising Tony Romo on whether or not he should pla...
Lazy Sunday
The Packers will keep pace with the Bears in the NFC North. Green Bay has managed to all but shut down Reggie Wayne and Marvin Harrison today, although Dominic Rhodes filled in nicely for the injured Joseph Addai (pronounced "Add-ee-ay", if you're Jeremy Piven). Manning threw a late pick on the goa...
I Think She's Mocking The Way You're Lying On The Couch
You remember that "Favre who?" sign you drew up at the beginning of the year when Green Bay started 2-0, only to shove it back in your closet after they lost 3 in a row? Well, it might be time to take it back out and dust if off, because Aaron Rodgers is looking sharp today! The Colts offense spent ...
Moving into the Late NFL Afternoon
All of the early games are final, and here are your scores: Bills (23) - Chargers (14) Panthers (30) - Saints (7) - There was fear that Reggie Bush's knee injury might be season-ending, but such talk was reportedly premature. Bears (48) - Vikings (41), Steelers (38) - Bengals (10) - Hey, Chad Johns...
Through Daylight and Through Darkness, the Cheerleading Shall Continue
• San Diego at Buffalo: As reader The Fan's Attic points out, the important thing to remember here, kids, is that despite the numerous power outages in the arena during this game, the suggestive dancing never stopped: "Bills cheerleaders continued their routines along the sidelines." USA! USA! USA!...
The NFL - Now With Rouges!
ESPN screw-up aside, there is a wild, wild game going on in the Windy City. The Bears lead the Vikings 27-24 in the third. Chicago's D has already scored two touchdowns, and Chester Taylor stole a TD from Adrian Peterson's fantasy owners just before the half. Blocked punts and field goals are every...
NFL Update
The games are still in their relative infancy, but here's what's going on so far... • New Orleans at Carolina: The Saints' Mike Karney carried the pigskin for a TD, and the Panthers put three points on the scoreboard early on courtesy of John Kasay's foot. Jonathan Stewart has given Carolina a 10-7...
NFL Preview: Awkwardness abounds!
Today's most attractive 1:00 match-up pits the Buffalo Bills against the San Diego Chargers. And today's most uncomfortable 1:00 match-up sees Buffalo defensive tackle John McCargo reunited with the team that tried, unsuccessfully, to trade him to the Colts on Wednesday. Yep, McCargo went from elat...
Breaking News! Tony Romo Stands Around Watching Practice, Terrible Concerts
But that's not all - he also did some light football tossing yesterday...with the very hand he throws a football with! Yep, no news was big news at Cowboys practice on Friday, as Romo suited up but didn't do a whole heckuva lot. The Cowboys' injury report lists him as questionable (with an "America...
Kellen Winslow: Please Stop Asking About My Junk
Good news, Browns fans. Your cantankerously talented tight end Kellen Winslow is no longer suffering from a mysterious ailment that may or may not be related to his testicular area. And...he might even suit up against the Redskins. Winslow addressed the media at practice today and let them know that...
Jay Cutler's Love Affair With His Own Opinions Continues
Is Jay Cutler under the impression that he's under oath every time he's asked a question by the media? Sure, it's entertaining for all of us, but eventually the Broncos quarterback is going to talk himself into trouble. While appearing on Fox's The Best Damn Sports Show Period on Thursday, Cutler wa...