nfl Page 984 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
NFL Week Thirteen, Update #1
• Artose Pinner is the best player in the NFL today. With Chester Taylor out with a rib problem, Pinner's stepped in and racked up 98 yards and 2 touchdowns. Brad Johnson also has a rushing touchdown, which isn't something I thought was in the Bad Johnson repertoire. He's also 10-of-15 for 124 yards...
It's Sleepy Football Night In America
We try to recap each weeknight game the morning after around here, because weekday games are rare and often are the talk of the "water cooler" around "the office" with one's "co-workers." Unfortunately, last night's Steelers-Browns tilt was, well, a completely shellacking that was over early and in ...
Well, It's Not That Big A Deal If You Miss This One
This, it's safe to say, is not one of those night when we're banging our head against the wall for not having the NFL Network. (We're far more concerned about missing the Rutgers bowl game.) The Steelers and the Browns, two teams long since removed from the playoff picture, go head to head tonight, ...
Bart Starr Totally Ditched This Chick Back In '66
Imagine, for a moment, that you're Bart Starr, a legendary quarterback, a hero to those who wear processed curds on their head, pretty much an all around prince of the planet. You're 72 years old; you just want to sign your merchandise, make sure your bladder's still working properly and sneak in an...
Big Ben Gets The Brady Treatment
The guy who made that my-lord-it's-everywhere Tom Brady tribute video has come out with a new one, devoted to SHOTY Tournament quarterfinalist Ben Roethlisberger. It's moderately amusing, but we mostly enjoy that it briefly features our famous Big Ben photos and ends with the line "Should have start...
Saints' Wheezer Nailed For Inhaler Doping
The poor soul unfortunate enough to have been caught in the extreme closeup lens of a Getty Images photographer last week, seen here, is New Orleans Saints defensive tackle Hollis Thomas, who yesterday was suspended for four games by the NFL for violating its steroid policy....
Jeff Garcia Cannot Be Destroyed By A Mortal Man
From our experience, when Jeff Garcia is making this motion, and he's about to chuck it long and downfield, something bad is about to happen. We mean, it's Jeff Garcia! The last few years, his main purpose has been to be the target of Terrell Owens' sublimated man-on-man urges....
Amazingly, This Is Actually An Important NFC Game
As insane as it might be to contemplate, the Philadelphia Eagles, a team that seemingly hasn't won in months, a team that is legitimately trying to figure out if they're going to start Jeff Garcia or A.J. Feeley, a team that its fans can't even muster up enough enthusiasm to hate properly ... this t...
Nothing More Enraging Than A Buzzsaw Loss
You know, we have to admit, if we were a fan of the St. Louis Rams, or, say, a former USC star who isn't even strong enough right now to make the active roster of the St. Louis Rams, after losing convincingly to the Buzzsaw yesterday, well, we might want to stab someone in the face too....
Wear The Jersey Of Your Favorite Player's Venereal Disease!
You might remember the famous OutSports expose on the words that the NFL won't allow you to print on the back of their jerseys. Apparently, this guy, from the Atlanta game last weekend, was somehow able to iron on this tribute to Ron Mexico himself....
Punching Cops In The Chest? BAD IDEA
Can you believe it has only been a month since a Cincinnati Bengal was arrested? Seriously, it's almost as like they were winning and no one had noticed!...
NFL Roundup: The Steamrolling Saints And Jets
News And Notes From Week 13 in the NFL....
Sunday Night Football: Seahawks @ Broncos
Tonight, Jay Cutler becomes the next Broncos quarterback that no one in Denver will like because his name isn't "John Elway." Well, that might not be true. They could end up liking him. Denver had Super Bowl hopes as recent as a few weeks ago, so all Cutler has to do is rescue the floundering team, ...
NFL Week Thirteen, Update #4
• The Texans beat the Raiders. I feel like taking a baseball bat to my television, and I didn't even care who won this game. I don't even think anyone in Oakland or Houston cared about who won this game. Ron Dayne, the man whose career would not die, carried the ball 18 times for 95 yards. David C...
NFL Week Thirteen, Update #3
• Last week, Mathias Kiwanuka had Vince Young wrapped up for a sack, and let him go... this week, Kiwanuka intercepted a pass, and them fumbled it right back to the Cowboys. It's as if he wants Tom Coughlin to kill him in his sleep. Eli Manning is sort of outplaying Tony Romo right now. Romo's got 2...
NFL Week Thirteen, Update #2
• What a week for Pac-Man Jones... he gets his seized car back at a bargain price, and now, his Titans have pulled the big-time upset of Indianapolis Colts. And they did it despite wearing powder blue uniforms, which is normal and fine... except when paired with powder blue pants, when it starts to ...
NFL Week Thirteen, Update #1
• This one... I do not understand. The Lions have walked onto the shiny new FieldTurf surface and are leading the Patriots 10-3. It's been the Mike Furrey show, as he has six catches for 77 yards and a touchdown. The Bill Belichick genius has been effective to this point in his career, but the one t...
There's A Football World Cup? Real Football?
We're not sure how we missed this, but apparently, in July 2007, there's going to be a football World Cup. And not the weird foreign kind of football either; we mean, like, real football....
Pac Man Gets His Ride Back
You might remember, about a month ago, when the car belong to Titans defensive back Pac Man Jones went up for a police auction. We wondered then who, in fact, might want a car with the official Pac Man logo stitched into the headrest....
The Big Ben Police Dog
We bring you this famous YouTube video of the world's worst police dog in honor of the news that Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger has offered to buy a new police dog for his hometown of Findlay, Ohio, after theirs was killed when it ran into a neighbor's yard. (Deserved it, too!)...