nhl Page 204 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Hockey Night(s) In Europe
The NHL season hasn't even really started yet, but the Tampa Bay Lightning already have two losses. That's the same number of losses my rec league hockey team has and we didn't even have to go to the Czech Republic to earn them. (Heck, we don't even have uniforms.) The New York Rangers are the benef...
The NHL Season Is Here, All of Prague Rejoices
The NHL regular season starts today for a new year of blood and glory, fists and fury. (I'm such a freaking poet.) The league is abandoning its American following and fleeing to Prague to open the season with the Rangers and Lightning. What does it mean? It means unless you have the NHL network, you...
Surprise! It's Hockey Season!
Bet you didn't see that one coming, huh? But it's true, the NHL season begins Saturday in—where else?—Prague! Followed closely by a second regular season game in Stockholm, as part of the league's ongoing "Thanks for all your players" European initiative. But there's so much other goodness in store ...
Study: NHL Players with Bigger Heads Spend More Time in the Penalty Box
Honestly, this is a study. Thanks to the the fine people at Brock University in St. Catherine's, Ontario we know that NHL players with fat heads spend more time in the penalty box. How? Evidently head width runs the gamut from the skinny (1.6) to the unusually wide (2.3). By studying the profile pi...
Red Wings and Blackhawks Head To Wrigley Field for New Year's 2009
Even if you're not a hockey fan this will be pretty cool to watch. Of course I might just think that because I've married into a Detroit family that is rabid for the Red Wings. My mother-in-law still believes that the Nashville Predators have the worst-behaved fans in the NHL because of a game she a...
Sean Avery Will Now Have To J.O. To Dallas Ladies
Well, isn't that fitting. Fashion-friendly hockey menace Sean Avery gets savaged by Gawker due to his "I'm Going Home To Jerk Off To You Now" comment at a Paris fashion show and then signs a 4-year deal with the Dallas Stars. The Stars are excited about his hockey skills more than his masturbatio...
Just Because They're In A Hockey Musical, It Doesn't Mean They Like To Puck Dudes
Say what you will about former Deadspin hockey wonk, Greg Wyshynski, but the man always seems to find some sort of tie-ins between hockey and homosexuality. This week, Puck Daddy delves into the motivation for "Hockey: The Musical!", which is having its big bawdy debut at the Toronto Fringe Festiva...
Congratulations, Kid. You've Been Drafted.
Tomorrow night in Ottawa, dozens of kids too young to legally drink will be drafted by professional hockey franchises willing to devote time, effort, and a boatload of money to turning them into Stanley Cup Champions. The NHL Draft will kick off Friday, and for that, we turn to Melt Your Face-Off, w...
Loving That Stanley Cup
As is abundantly clear around here, we're hardly the biggest hockey experts, but we're still human, which means we really love the Stanley Cup Trophy. So rarely is any piece of hardware treated with such reverence; heck, in baseball, they try to hump the damn trophy....
Congratulations, Stanley Cup Champion Detroit Red Wings
The NHL Closer is written by five people of European descent at Melt Your Face Off. We're not the first people to blog the Stanley Cup Finals, but Don Cherry still calls us "soft". So, for all you kids out there, Raskolnikov toughened up to recapitulate Detroit's clincher....
Sykora Calls His Shot
The NHL Closer is written by five insomniacs from Melt Your Face Off. We blame overtime hockey and copious amounts of caffeine for our condition. Raskolnikov downed two cases of Mountain Dew to recapitulate last night's epic thriller....
Ice Hockey At Wrigley Field: The End Times Are Here
If you think it would be fun to see Chicago fans reach onto the field of play and try to interfere with a puck instead of a baseball for a change, then you're in luck. The NHL's second Outdoor Winter Classic game will pit the Chicago Blackhawks against the Detroit Red Wings at Wrigley Field, accordi...
Mellon Arena: The Final Frontier
The NHL Closer is written by the five Star Trek: The Next Generation enthusiasts from Melt Your Face Off. When not attending conventions, they can be found in their makeshift Holodeck, where they practice putting the moves on a virtual Counselor Troi. Set your phasers to stun, Deadspinners, because ...
Kristen Bell Would Do Naughty Things To Chris Osgood
I've had that dream again: Elle Bishop from the TV show Heroes is taking a sponge bath in the Stanley Cup. What does it mean? Actually, it's based in truth: Actress Kristen Bell is a big fan of the Detroit Red Wings — specifically of Chris Osgood — and would also like to get some time alone with the...
The Stanley Cup Finals Mule Variations
The NHL Closer is written by five octopi from Melt Your Face Off. When Al Sobotka isn't twirling us over his head, we're served with pickled ginger, green onion and mayonnaise in takoyaki. Raskolnikov emptied his ink sacs to write a recap of last night's action....
Who Wants A Trophy-Shaped Cup? (Cup-Shaped Trophy?)
There once was a man by the name of Stanley, who decided that average trophies were not good enough for hockey teams, so he went and sculpted a cup based on a napkin drawing by Nigel Tufnel. The trophy was supposed to be 35 feet tall, but he got his inches and feet mixed up....
The Bus Needs Directions to the Stanley Cup Finals
The Deadspin Stanley Cup Finals Preview is brought to you by the five former Mouseketeers at Melt Your Face Off. And no, neither Britney nor Lindsay would give them the time of day....
Ooof, Stars, That'll Leave a Mark
The NHL Closer is written by five checking-line centers from Melt Your Face Off. When we're not receiving praise for our work ethic, we're taking shots to kill the pain from blocking shots. Raskolnikov momentarily stopped playing along the boards to write this recap....