nhl Page 216 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
You Won't See Any Sammy Pahlsson Coverage On Al-Jazeera
we're not gonna make a "nobody watches the nhl" joke ... we're not gonna make a "nobody watches the nhl" joke ......
To Watch Tonight...
• 8:00, NBC. Stanley Cup Finals. Anaheim Ducks @ Ottawa Senators. Or the All Children's Telethon, which should be good, too. • 8:00, ESPN2. Soccer. China vs. United States. If this game is so "friendly," why even keep score? • 8:30, TNT. NBA Playoffs. Detroit Pistons @ Cleveland Cavaliers. Craig Sag...
There Has To Be A Way To Combine A Hockey Game And A Telethon
Hockey continues to feel the sting of disrespect from their network television home. This time, the slap in the face isn't national, but limited to just the Tampa market. For now, anyway. We'll have to wait and see what happens if tonight's game goes into overtime....
NHL Fans Are That Much More Special Today
If you didn't watch the Stanley Cup Finals Game 2 last night — and of course you did — you might have missed this odd shot of Snoop Dogg, who, for reasons unbeknown to anyone but him (and probably not him either), was wearing a fake mustache....
Stanley Cup Finals Pants Party: Ducks Vs. Senators
We're taking Memorial Day off, as you've surely noticed — though we're excited LeBron and the Jazz have given us something to pay attention to — but we are doing one post: A preview of the Stanley Cup Finals. They drop the puck tonight at 8 p.m. ET, with the Anaheim (Not Mighty) Ducks against the Ot...
Bill Clement, You Sly Son Of A Bitch
Goodness. I hope that's not how he told his mom "Happy Mother's Day."...
Fortunately, Nobody Wants To Watch A Playoff Overtime
As MJD pointed out yesterday, NBC, amazingly, cut away from the Senators-Sabres Game 5 overtime yesterday to show ... the first two hours of the Preakness prerace coverage. That's right: Rather than show the most exciting part of an entire hockey season, NBC chose to show Bob Costas interview people...
Hockey Is Not NBC's Top Priority
It's nice that the NHL has a deal with NBC. It would be even nicer if NBC didn't remind hockey fans just how insignificant their little Canadian game is at every single opportunity....
Pity The Poor Buffalo Fan
Heading into the NHL playoffs, the subplot we were most excited about involved the Buffalo Sabres, a team with a long-suffering but rabid — we mean literally rabid; it's in the Buffalo drinking water — fanbase and a No. 1 seed. After they beat the Rangers, it all appeared to be coming together. At l...
NHL Stanley Cup Pants Party: Red Wings Vs. Ducks
We have always found it amusing that Anaheim decided to take the positive modifier "Mighty" out of its name; we know they wanted to avoid the Disney context, but usually when there's a "Fighting" or a "Runnin'" in there, it's supposed to be a good thing. Now they are Ducks, simply Ducks....
NHL Stanley Cup Pants Party: Sabres Vs. Senators
And here, you thought we were completely ignoring the NHL playoffs. To remind you: Canuck please!...
Nothing Beats A Toupee Mullet
A story we've been wanting to write for sometime involves the sad plight of the toupee maker. We don't know anyone under the age of 40 who would ever wear a toupee again; these days, it's easier just to shave it. Nobody minds, everyone understands, it even looks kind of cool. But there are hundreds ...
You Can't Stop Barbaro, You Can Only Hope To Put Him Down
Expect, in the next week, Madison Square Garden to be haunted by the ghost of a rather pissed Barbaro; the overtime in the Rangers-Sabres game yesterday caused the Barbaro documentary to be postponed and rescheduled for the vastly unworthy CNBC this Friday. Jeez, why don't you just put the damned th...
Michael Bloomberg Cannot Be Bothered With Your 'Hockey'
Let it be known that Michael Bloomberg is a serious man with many important papers on his desk, and that his office has wood paneling and various brass fixtures. This leaves him little time for traditional sports wagers with other, lesser mayors....
Look Over Here! We Use Steroids, Too! Look, Dammit!
In their ongoing battle for relevancy in the world of sports, the NHL took a positive step forward yesterday, proving that their sport is cool enough to require the use of steroids. New York Islanders 37-year-old journeyman defenseman Sean Hill was busted for abusing performance enhancers....
MSG Pulling No Punches In Dance Skater Lawsuit
You might remember, from a while back, a lawsuit involving Madison Square Garden and former Rangers City Skater Courtney Prince, who claims she was fired for reporting a sexual harassment with a Garden employee. (The employee tried to talk Prince into having a threesome, which, somehow, didn't work....
Beer That Makes You SKINNY!
During the NHL Playoffs, your fans need to bust out the big guns if they're going to appropriately cheer your team onto victory. Your normal selection of Molson and elk bile isn't gonna do it; you're gonna need to start chugging the heroin beer....
Versus Still Working Out The Kinks
Late Wednesday night/Thursday morning, the Dallas Stars and Vancouver Canucks were in the midst of a four-overtime marathon game. Henrik Sedin took a pass from his brother Daniel, aimed to get a shot past Dallas goalie Marty Turco, and hey, could I interest you in the Winsor Pilates total body fitne...
NHL Western Conference Playoff Pants Party
OK, here's the second half of copyranter's NHL Playoff preview. We still haven't figured out what channel most of these games are on, by the way....
Fun With Facial Hair!
One of our favorite subplots of every NHL playoffs slate is the growing of a playoff beard. Because we didn't start puberty until we were 26, we still cannot grow a beard — honestly, we're barely a mammal — so we look at the tradition with envy. A solid playoff beard can foster team unity or, in a p...