nit Page 243 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This Is How Panama Thanks Us For The Canal
Your morning roundup for June 12, the day we made out with Mary-Kate....
Deadspin I-Team: Help Us Find Footage of the 2006 USA-South Africa World Baseball Classic Game
On March 10, 2006, the USA beat South Africa 17-0 in the first World Baseball Classic game in history to be mercy-ruled. We're interested in obtaining the telecast for the game. It was shown on an ESPN network. If you have it or can get it, let us know. It's for a little project....
Joe Paterno Uses Skype, Wonders Why He Can't Get A Dial Tone
Obvious joke: I had no idea you could Skype on the Jitterbug. Actually, you know what, this whole post and comments section is going to be obvious jokes about old people using technology. So let's just say this is probably some sort of recruiting violation, and Paterno thought he was talking to his ...
Wayne Rooney's Bloody Hair Plugs Are Literally Bloody
"Hi all there's my head. It will take a few months to grow. Still a bit bloody to. But that's all normal. #hairwego" [@WayneRooney; Previously]...
Clint Hurdle Is Fine, Everybody
So this morning we alerted you to the mysteriously magenta visage of Pirates skipper Clint Hurdle. He is fine. We know that, now....
Here's Video Of Lionel Messi's UEFA-Championship Winning Goal For FC Barcelona
Final score: Barcelona 3, Manchester United 1. In retrospect, the game ended the moment Lionel Messi seized the Best Player In The World chatter and made it reality....
Your Barcelona/Manchester United Open Thread
Best I can tell from the handy 'Countdown to UEFA Champions League Wembley London Final 2011,' the FC Barcelona v. Manchester United game should kick-off at precisely 2:45 p.m. eastern. It's a match between the two best club teams on earth, worthy of not only U.S. network coverage but a day when th...
Hockey Player Misses Five Minutes Of Game Time With Broken Face, Returns In Time For Season-Losing Goal
Your morning roundup for May 29, the day after death told the world that the puffy-faced Grandma Bandit was actually a man....
A Video Compilation Of Silly Tribute Songs To Man U Striker Chicharito
In advance of the Champions League final tomorrow between Manchester United and Barcelona, here's an amusing video about Javier "Chicharito" Hernandez, the dynamic Mexican striker who's been a vital part of Man U's success this year. Hay salsa. Hay rap. Hay awesomeness at 02:20. Make sure you get ...
Here's The Video Where LeBron James Takes Flopping To Heretofore Unseen Levels
Your morning roundup for May 27, the day it helps to have a background in mathematics if you want to work for Pauly Shore. Video H/T Allen W...
Rays Fan, A Lawyer, Ejected For Wearing A "Yankees Suck" T-Shirt, Surely Won't Pursue Any Legal Recompense
This is a story about Melvin H. Little, a Tampa Bay Rays $20,000-a-year season-ticket holder from way back when they still had Devil in their names, taking his two sons to a ballgame the other night. They had good seats, about 10 rows behind the plate. He sported a "Yankees Suck" T-shirt because, w...
David Beckham Secures A Post-Soccer Future In Field Security With This Fan Takedown
English soccer clubs sometimes play "testimonials," in which they bring back their older stars for a friendly match of former rivals. Like parades or bowling parties, it's a nice way to make the old folk feel appreciated for still being around. Yesterday, with Man United playing Juventus in the Ga...
Totally Anonymous Soccer Player Sues Twitter For Saying Ryan Giggs Had An Affair
Some married British soccer player had an affair with a model, and we guessed it was Ryan Giggs. But the media couldn't reveal his name because of a court order. So someone signed up for Twitter and started naming names, including that of Ryan Giggs. But we still don't know for certain that Ryan Gig...
Tubby Messi Impersonator Dribbles Past Old Women, Sheep To Reenact Goal Against Real Madrid
That's how easy it is to get to Wembley, according to this silly video which looks to have been made by Opel and recreates Messi's second goal against Madrid in the first leg of the Champion's League semifinal. There's also a version with crones:...
West Ham Can't Even Keep Its Hooligans Out Of The Team's Year-End Banquet
West Ham United threw itself a little end-of-season awards banquet on Monday night in London (to celebrate, ostensibly, West Ham's relegation after finishing last in the Premier League). Some of the team's fans attended the banquet, which turned out to be a very bad idea indeed:...
Wayne Rooney Decided To Send A Message With Chest Hair Today
After his side clinched a record 19th English Premier League title with 1-1 draw vs. the Blackburn Rovers, cheeky Manchester United star Wayne Rooney simply posted, "Champions http://yfrog.com/h2cjceij."...
Man U Manager Alex Ferguson Charged With Earnestly Complimenting A Referee
Sir Alex Ferguson, manager of Manchester United who recently served a five-game suspension and paid a £30,000 fine for criticizing a referee after a 2-1 loss in March, has once again been charged with improper conduct for publicly speaking about a referee....
An Update On Telling You Which Soccer Player Had An Affair With This Lady
We felt very bad last time. We hate blind items (though we did guess Ryan Giggs). But there's this thing in the UK where celebrities can get court-ordered injunctions against newspapers publishing items about their personal lives. They're called injunctions, and lots of celebrities have them, and to...
Phil Jackson Agrees That His Career Has Been The "Bee's Knees"
Your morning roundup for May 9, the day we learned of the Village tree thief....
Presenting The 18-Minute Video Of Shin-Soo Choo's Failed Roadside Sobriety Test
Your morning roundup for May 5, the day a former vice president wants you to thank "enhanced interrogation" for the current president's visit to Ground Zero....