nit Page 254 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Brady's New Wife Reveals Many Things About Their Relationship (And Her Body) In Vanity Fair Interview
Gisele Bundchen gives Vanity Fair a candid glimpse into her new domesticated life as Mrs. Tom Brady. Nude, of course....
Adrian Peterson Will Not Save Your Community College Football Program
This just in: Adrian Peterson is not donating $150,000 to save the North Iowa Area Community College football program, as was reported on Friday. Also, there is no Batman. Sorry everyone....
Everybody Loves The Underdog
Fulham are leading Manchester United 1-0 at halftime. I'm told this is unexpected, but that's what they get for benching Rooney and Tevez. Scholes was sent off in the 18th minute for being old. [ESPN]...
Adrian Peterson's Community College Economic Stimulus Package
The Vikings' Adrian Peterson and other NFL players come to the rescue of Northern Iowa Area Community College, donating "close to $150,000" to keep the football program from folding. [The Globe Gazette]...
Don't (Or Do) Forget Those Other Basketball Tournaments!
There are three—three!—other postseason tournaments now that are not the NCAA tournament? Why is that again?...
The United Football League Is What We Thought It Was!
Denny Green and Jim Fassel are back coaching pro football, and there may be a spot for Michael Vick as well. Welcome to the wonderful world of the UFL!...
Crazed Penn State Fan Did Not Mean To Crush Talor Battle
Penn State student tackles his favorite player in the middle of an unruly mob, but claims that it was not his fault that his hero was nearly murdered. Whatever helps you sleep, buddy. [Crispin and Cream]...
Goalie Uses Newfangled Gadget To Outfox Penalty Kickers
Manchester United won the Carling Cup last weekend in a dramatic(?) penalty shootout, but it turns out that goalie Ben Foster may have had some technological assistance....
Tiny Elite School Dominates Tiny Elitist Sport
Trinity College in Connecticut won its 11th straight national title on Sunday, extending their consecutive match winning streak to an unconscionable 202 straight, a feat that would much more impressive if anyone cared about squash....
Illinois, Penn State Try Out Innovative New Square Basketball On Wednesday
Hey, it wasn't me this time: Scott Van Pelt (he's back!) had this to say about Penn State's 38-33 win over Illinois on Wednesday. "Watching Big Ten basketball is like watching fat people have sex."...
Stanley Pringle Still Ignoring Your Creative Taunts
As basketball nicknames go, The Library Masturbator is probably greater than even Dr. J or Black Mamba. Man, I hope Stanley Pringle makes it to the NBA....
Wait! Where's Everybody Going?!
Lion attack! Quarterback Kevin Newsome and kicker Anthony Fera decommit from Michigan and agree to play for Penn State. [The 700 Level]...
On-Court Drowning Nearly The Most Exciting Highlight Of OKC Thunder Season
If you've even been to a live sporting event in North America, then you've probably seen some terrible halftime entertainment—but that's because so few halftimes involve a death-defying act that actually defies death....
British Soccer: Like A Sunny, Fun Day At Disneyland
So which is more distasteful, sports fans?: Mocking plane crash victims, or wishing someone dead from a car wreck? Don't worry, it's British soccer. You can have both!...
The Deadspin Pub: Help Yourself (Because I Sure Can't)
By request: Soccer hooligans may commiserate in here. I'm told Chelsea and Manchester United are playing right now, which sounds important, but what do I know?...
The One With More Spanish Diving Semi-Exhibitionism
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....
One Final Olympics Retrospective, If We May (With NSFW Jumpness)
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
The One With White, Hairy, Humanitarian Bowl Backside
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another. (NSFW)...
Maybe The Sprinklers Came On During The Match
Manchester United won't appeal the four-match ban against star Patrice Evra, levied for — get this — his fight with a groundskeeper. [Guardian.co.uk]...
Joe Paterno Continues To Age In Reverse
JoePa gets three-year contract extension from Penn State. Grim Reaper throws down scythe in disgust; Nittany Lion pours himself another cocktail. [NBCSports]...