nl Page 164 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Red Sox Are Losing Because John Lackey Likes To Double-Fist Beers, Writes Moron
The Red Sox lost a baseball game last night, dropping their record to three games below .500, and you know what that means, don't you? It's time for some dumb columnist to turn into Carrie Nation and throw some shit at the wall. CSN New England's Joe Haggerty did just that when he published this ar...
"I Would Like To Extend You A Counter-Offer To Suck My Dick": A Rejected Jobseeker Sends The Padres The Best Letter Ever
Taylor Grey Meyer estimates that she applied for a job with the San Diego Padres at least 30 times since moving to Coronado, Calif. Initially, in the sales office; but as she was alternately rejected and ignored, she lowered her sights. This past March, she applied for a minimum-wage job selling tic...
Zach Galifianakis And Will Ferrell Race To The Middle. <em>The Campaign</em>, Reviewed.
1. That The Campaign could never come up with a fictional scenario that would rival the absurdity of what actually happens in our daily political discourse is an obvious point, yet one that needs to be made again nevertheless. Is any sort of shtick that Will Ferrell could dream up odder than a reali...
The Conspiracy To Kill A Great Movie Franchise. <em>The Bourne Legacy</em>, Reviewed.
1. The first three Jason Bourne films had an intensity, a vitality to them that made them feel urgent and relevant, grounded in the messy real world of global capitalism and a U.S. government that was alternately confused, corrupt, and terrified. The movies didn't have a specific politics other than...
Hollywood Gets Sex Right, For Once: The Surprisingly Honest <em>Hope Springs</em>
For a subject that's so popular, sex is something most people have a hard time discussing. This is especially true in Hollywood movies, where it's usually treated as exciting (9 1/2 Weeks) or dangerous (Basic Instinct) but rarely realistically. Even when sex is taken seriously, like in last year's a...
Ryan Lochte Update: Ryan Lochte Is Hanging Out With Ludacris At The USA-Argentina Game
Here's a photo of Ryan Lochte watching Team USA square off against Argentina (where the referees seem to have placed their chips on "untimely player death" and Team USA is dominating) with famous American rapper/star of 2 Fast 2 Furious Chris "Ludacris" Bridges. The other guy is apparently also a sw...
On His Way Out The Door, Ryan Lochte Admits He Pees In The Pool
This has been reported all over the place, usually without much additional comment, and Lochte has yet to clarify that he was joking, so I guess it's a real thing. From TVGuide.com:...
Nothing We Haven't Seen Before: <em>Total Recall</em>, Reviewed.
1. As a skeptic of the original Total Recall, I was ready to give its remake more than a fair shake. My primary issue with the original is how little it does with the film's initial, fantastical Philip K. Dick premise, that the difference between reality and fantasy is not only slim but perhaps irre...
A Very Obsessive Guide To <em>Sight & Sound</em>'s Greatest Films Poll
Yesterday was heaven for film lovers and list fanatics as Sight & Sound unveiled its once-a-decade poll of the greatest films of all time. There are actually two separate lists—one for critics, one for directors—and the big news was that, after topping the poll since 1962, Citizen Kane had been repl...
Call Him "Baby Shoes," ’Cuz Ryan Lochte Just Got Bronzed
First he gets outraced by a 16-year-old Chinese girl who's not even in the pool with him. Now here's Ryan Lochte, in the middle lane above, getting beaten to the wall in the 200-meter breastbackstroke by teammate Tyler Clary (in an Olympic record 1:53.41) and Japan's Ryosuke Irie, both of whom passe...
No One Is Saying Whether NBC's Olympic Streaming Is A Success
NBC coughed up more than $1 billion to air these 2012 Summer Olympics and it's going to squeeze every last revenue dollar out of its investment. That means constant tape delays, tons of commercials, overly creative editing, and jingoism galore. (And you can probably forget about seeing anything inte...
Gore Vidal's <em>Myra Breckinridge</em> Became One Of The Weirdest Movies Ever Made
Gore Vidal died yesterday, and though he appeared as an actor in a few movies—he played a professor in With Honors, an evil futuristic fellow in Gattaca and, most memorably, as Tim Robbins' lefty opponent in Bob Roberts—he'll be remembered, in a movie sense, as the guy responsible for Myra Breckinri...
The 10 Films I'm Most Excited To See At The Toronto Film Festival
We've got about a month left of summer movie season, but the studios are about to start unveiling their Oscar candidates—that is, the films they think are actually good. A lot of these get their launch at the Toronto Film Festival, which will run from September 6 to 16....
Phelps And Lochte No Match For Mighty French, Settle For Silver in Freestyle Relay
Welp, at least Ryan Lochte has some more silver hardware to add to his grill. The French came back to win the Men's 4x100m relay after the Americans had been leading throughout. France finished strong with a time of 3:9:93 and the U.S. foursome settled for second place with a time of 3:10:38....
Ryan Lochte Wins Gold In Men's 400 Individual Medley, Michael Phelps Not On The Podium
Ryan Lochte is your winner in this evening's afternoon's 400m individual medley. Michael Phelps, the lazy bastard, did not medal in the event....
Don't Wait Until Tonight To Watch Michael Phelps And Ryan Lochte Swim The 400 IM
NBC is tape-delaying the Men's 400 IM, so if you don't feel like sitting around like a sucker until NBC's prime time coverage, watch it online here at 2:30 p.m....
Michael Phelps, America's Laziest Olympian, Barely Qualifies For Tonight's 400 Individual Medley
We were this close (seven-hundredths of a second-close) to missing a Phelps-Lochte face-off. This guy just can't get motivated. After deciding to saunter his way through the London Olympics, participating in only seven events and not the eight he dominated in Beijing, Phelps almost wound up competi...
<em>Total Recall</em> Is a Lot Dumber Than You Remember
The remake of Total Recall — which features Colin Farrell as Arnold Schwarzenegger, Kate Beckinsale as Sharon Stone, Jessica Biel as Rachel Ticotin and Bryan Cranston as "Cohaagen give these people some air!" — opens a week from today. The original Total Recall came out in 1990, right on the edge of...
When Michael Phelps Was A 15-Year-Old Dork Olympian Who Kept Losing His Retainer
This is maybe not news, per se, but it's suprising how many people forget that Michael Phelps's last Olympics will actually be his fourth. Yes, before Phelps became America's greatest swimmer and most eligible doofus, he was a regular old 15-year-old doofus, just happy to be at the Sydney games....