on Page 6199 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

And The Lieutenant Governor Could Be Mini Ditka
I'd like to think that the current Mike Ditka for Governor of Illinois movement isn't just a scheme to sell T-shirts and coffee mugs, but I'm not so sure. Just look at their site....

The 49ers, Wacky Mustaches, David Letterman And You
The 49ers and Raiders have had pretty horrific seasons, but the Bay Area franchises couldn't be handling their lack of success more differently....

R.I.P. Dock Ellis: The Curveball That Rode The Dragon
It is fitting that the great Dock Ellis died on a Friday, which is the worst day to die. Nobody pays attention to news on Saturdays....

The Year In ... Restroom Hijinks
So, the next nine days will be chock full of end-of-year retrospectives. We'll do our own as well. Today: Restroom hijinks....

Do Not Watch Unless You Feel Like Screaming
This is from this past weekend's New Orleans bowl, where Southern Miss receiver DeAndre Brown's leg just...stopped working. Brown is 6-6, 230 pounds of can't-miss NFL prospect. Amazingly, after successful surgery on Sunday night to repair the "clean break", he still might not miss anytime in 2009....

Another Lawsuit For Plaxico Burress
Plaxico Burress is being sued by a woman he rear-ended—with his car, jerks!—back in May, three days after he forgot to pay his insurance premiums. That seems so unlike him, doesn't it? [NY Daily News]...

Let's Face It; Junior Seau Is Huggable, And Fans Are Only Human
So the guy who ran onto the field and tackled the Patriots' Junior Seau on Sunday? He's an Iraq war National Guard veteran, and his lawyer says it was all a big mistake....

That's Just ... Not. Right.
• Nice hops: This poor Chinese girl lost both her legs in an accident, so her family replaced them with a basketball. And I thought my health insurance was bad. [Sports Rubbish]...

Last Minute Christmas Gift Ideas For The Lazy And Insane
Christmas is two days away and you've done zero shopping; nice going, jerk. Fortunately it's not too late to surprise the kids with Inflatable Ben Wallace, the basketball defender aide....

That's Why The Lady Is A Champ
Your new "female" Long-Drive Champ: "This is who I am. This is my life. That other person, that 245-pound SWAT cop I used to be, he's gone. He's not coming back." [Golf Week]...

Merciful Jesus May Be Ready To End Teixeira Drama
Mark Teixeira supposedly about to sign with someone, but no ones knows with whom, or for how much. So let's pretend it's the Mets. [SI.com]...

Sweet, Cold Chicago
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Is Brian Baldinger's Mangled Digit Growing A Face?
Brian Baldinger's permanently dislocated little finger has been well documented by many, many people since he first started appearing on national television as an NFL analyst....

Do Not Challenge Shaun Ellis To A Snowball Fight
Here's one more little tidbit, from the winter wonderland that was Week 16 in the NFL....

Junior Seau Is Not As Quick As He Used To Be
We know that networks don't like to show bad fan behavior for fear of copycats, but we really need to see video of the idiot that tackled Junior Seau on the sidelines yesterday. [Vent]...

The Year In ... Cheerleading
So, the next nine days will be chock full of end-of-year retrospectives. We'll do our own as well. Today: Cheerleaders....

An Internet Protest Will Change Everything!
• Oh, right. The losing: Wow, all those Ottawa Senators bloggers are upset about something. I have no idea what it could be though. [Scarlett Ice]...

Brian Urlacher's Kooky Baby Mama Heads To Prison
Tyna Robertson, the lovely mother of Bears linebacker Brian Urlacher's son, was arrested by Cook County sheriff's police after she missed a court date. [Chicago Breaking News]...

Brady Quinn's Beautiful Face May Have Been Damaged
Rumors are flying around Cleveland about a possible altercation between Browns defensive lineman Shaun Smith and quarterback Brady Quinn....

The Year In...Sports Fella
So, the next nine days will be chock full of end-of-year retrospectives. We'll do our own as well. Today: Bill Simmons...