on Page 6337 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Greatest 'NBA Closer' In The History Of Western Civilization!
The NBA Closer is written by our own Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores, he can be heard on The Basketball Jo— Shut it down, little man. Shut it DOWN! What a pathetic performance by this sad human being. This guy is a disgrace to the game of basketball a...

About Last Night
What you missed while composing The Ballad of Nick Saban (some lyrics NSFW) ... • NBA: Don Nelson says Warriors' win over Spurs deserves an asterisk. • MLB: Mad Max, Beyond Fukudome ... Cubs bolster outfield for only $48 million. • NHL: Dual hat tricks? Get Out! (Elaine shoves Jerry). Flyers 8, Peng...

Apparently, College Athletes Study
As we slowly stumble toward the end of the year, we have hit that dead spot during the week in which there are no NFL games, no bowl games yet and a bunch of NBA games in which most of the players are hungover. (We're in the midst of holiday party season ourselves, so we know how they feel.) But the...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as your parrot comes back as a potato chip ... • NBA: Seattle at Chicago. Go Cubs! Oh, sorry; my mistake. Carry on. [WGN] • NHL: Pittsburgh at Philadelphia. Why no team named the Ice Bears? [Versus] • Soccer: UEFA Champions League; Real Madrid CF vs. SS Lazio, at Madrid. Taped. Isn't t...

Rick Reilly Makes Eight Times As Much Money As Jonathan Papelbon
As Sussman put it, ESPN filled its "Badly Needed Smart-Alecky Middle-Aged White Guy Quota" by hiring Sports Illustrated's Rick Reilly, who filed his last SI column a couple of weeks ago. He won't start until June 1 of next year, which should give him plenty of time to hone those "multimedia" skills....

What The Mitchell Report Could Possibly Mean
Baseball has promised that the Mitchell Report will be out by Christmas, and several sources are whispering that it'll be out this week, including those who have talked to SI's John Donovan, who has an excellent pregame rundown. (Howard Bryant at ESPN has a great piece as well....

Fun Time In Dolphins Land
We have made no secret of our enduring love of The Dugout, both in its original incarnation and its current, non-expletive form at AOL Sports. But you think these guys just know baseball? Pshaw. Therefore, Football Guys, the official chatroom of the NFL. It will run here on Deadspin weekly, every Tu...

This Week In The SSW
For years — OK, a couple of days — Slate writer Robert Weintraub has been tinkering with a concept called The SSW, short for "The Sean Salisbury Wisdom," which tracks the consensus of the football punditocracy to ensure those triumphant declarations from Friday aren't flushed down the memory hole on...

SHOTY Elite Eight: Elijah Dukes Vs. Gilbert Arenas
At last, we have completed the endless first round of the 2007 Sportshuman Of The Year tournament. It only took a month. Now we're down the nitty-gritty: The Elite Eight....

Fried Chicken
• An odd choice of words by the Falcons owner last night. [The Big Lead] • Reggie Bush isn't the problem: It's the NFL. [100 Percent Injury Rate] • College hoops coaches: Who's the most macho? [The Pyramid Of Excess] • Clemson loves that lousy early season schedule. [Vegas Watch] • It's fun to grab ...

Year In Review: January
You might remember, toward the end of last year, when we reviewed each month of the past year leading up to New Years Day. We called it, imaginatively, "Year In Review." Well, we're gonna do that again, starting today, with the fine month of January. We're digging through our archives pretty well, b...

In Praise Of Dwight Howard
Every two weeks, the gents at Free Darko will be taking a look at the deranged ecosystem that is the National Basketball Association in their own indelible fashion. Here's this week's entry, from Bethlehem Shoals....

That's A Lot Of Points, Folks
Well, the Sunday NFL spreads are out, and ... Oh My Lord. If you thought that there would be no way you'd touch the Jets-Patriots game, can Las Vegas tempt you with 24 1/2 points? And some freshly-baked lemon squares? That's right oddsmakers; Mangenius vs. Belicheat now features the largest point sp...

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its wittiest, boldest most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

Is Tennis Mobbed Up?
We should have seen it coming: It seems that the Russian Mafia may have infiltrated pro tennis (this surprises me: I would have guessed chess). But don't worry, sports fans; we have our best man on the case. John McEnroe. The former American great points to questions surrounding tennis stars such as...

Why Vick's Gonna Be In The Slammer So Long
We remember Ron Mexico's contrite, emotional press conference from August, when he nearly broke down and talked about his love for the Lord. We found it an impressive confession. His initial confession was a bit less graceful....

Isiah Says It's All YOUR Fault
Athletes and coaches will never understand one basic tenet about being a sports fan: If your team wins games, you're the loudest, most supportive fans alive. If your team loses all the time, no matter how loyal you are to your team and how devoted you are, you tend not to scream that much. It is not...


Sweet Sassy Molassy!
For the rest of 2007, the NHL Closer will be written by the fine folks at Melt Your Face Off. Enjoy....

Heat Check, Heat Rising, Etc., Etc.
The NBA Closer is written by our own Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast. Enjoy!...