on Page 6378 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after you are grounded for 15 years ...• College football: Louisville at West Virginia. Fear the cardinal. Its pecking could break the skin and give you a very bad infection. [ESPN] • NBA: Detroit at Chicago; Dallas at Golden State. Mavericks at Warriors. That somehow rings a bell ... ...
Please Keep Roger Clemens At The Forefront Of Your Brain
One would have thought, after that "ow, my hamstring, I have to LEAVE!" display by Roger Clemens in the ALDS last month, the "Rocket," as they call him, would finally realize it's better to leave well enough alone. But no: Even though he's happy to take that "services contract" from the Astros — one...
Manute Bol And Spud Webb Can Sell Chicken
We're not going to harp on this, and we're not going to try to steal their luster, so we're just gonna beg you to sprint over to Wizznutzz and check out what is truly "the greatest piece of sports memorabilia of all time....
The Plight Of The Nerdy White Hoopster
We're rather excited to have the NBA back, not just because it's a gorgeous, chaotic bit of organizational improvisation, but because it reveals just how dorky looking white people are....
Clinton Portis Is Happily Weird Again
Via DC Sports Bog, which was invented for this very thing, it's Clinton Portis' newest "character." It's "Choo-Choo." We don't know what it means, and we don't care. It's like the final season of "Arrested Development;" not as inspired as the first go-arounds, but we're all just grateful it's back,...
The Houston Texans Are Full Of Political Intrigue
Amazingly, there's all kinds of political strife in the former Soviet land of Georgia. We know. Protests and corruption in Russia; now we've seen everything. Apparently the major opposition party is led by Matt Schaub. They're totally regretting passing on Reggie Bush as the leader of the oppositio...
Jamboroo, Week 10: Featuring Marmalard, A—hole Doctors, Depressed Bunnies, Goldfish, And Lots Of Other Stupid S—t
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon....
Can Schilling Keep The Weight Off Too?
• Some key questions about Curt Schilling's deal with the Red Sox. [UmpBump] • How the Yankees are like Any Given Sunday. [The Unemployed Journalist] • Welcome back, Roos! [Sports By Brooks] • Fight, Vinny ... Fight! [Sports Brethren] • Come on, Yadier Molina has to win the Gold Glove. [Cobra Brigad...
Colts Can't Quiet Din Of Controversy
The search is on for the brave, mysterious security guard who blew the whistle on the Indianapolis Colts' apparent efforts to pipe in extra crowd noise in the RCA Dome on Sunday. It didn't take long for the team's house of lies to come crumbling down, once WBZ photojournalist Bryan Foley was on the ...
Welcome To The NHL, Kid
Toronto Maple Leafs forward Jiri Tlusty is one of the top young prospects in the NHL, and he scored two goals a couple weeks ago despite only being 19 years old. So how is he welcomed to the big time? Some Canadian Perez Hilton knockoff site keeps calling him gay....
Pedro's Offseason Workout Regimen
Far be it from us to tell a professional athlete how to live his/her life, but heavens, Pedro, you're turning into Schilling....
We Have To Ask
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. Fantasy sports with Cockroft: Pole vaulting with Allison Stokke! Wait, what was the question? • Noon. NCAA MBB with Andy Katz: Where shall we go when the Mid-Majors rise up and enslave mankind? • 2 p.m. Inside college hockey: H...
Dennis Dixon Takes Tougher Classes Than Matt Leinart
You might remember a couple of years ago, when everyone had their proverbial panties in a proverbial bunch about Matt Leinart taking only one class his senior year, ballroom dancing. This ultimately didn't turn out well for Leinart; all that extra time just gave him more impregnation opportunities. ...
MLS Exhibition Livened Up By Naked Man
This is from last night's exhibition match between the Los Angeles Galaxy and Vancouver Whitecaps. Honestly, if we were a security guard, you couldn't pay us enough to tackle that guy....
This Morning, Ashley Judd Weeps
The college basketball season has barely started — really, it hasn't, not at all — and we've already had three ridiculous upsets (even if two didn't count). This is a welcome break; if you'll remember the NCAA tournament last year, we barely had any. We hope this is a good sign....
Can We Handle Another Undefeated Boston Team?
• Green Day. If there was ever any doubt that Kevin Garnett is the new sheriff in town, this video should help to clear that up. The clip is from the Celtics' win over the Wizards, I think, but kind of illustrates who is really in charge. And that's OK — I wish the NBA would go back to the concept o...