out Page 153 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
If You Want To Get Your Two-Year-Old Drunk, Try The Hibachi Place In Jackson Twp., Ohio
"Two-year-old Karl Preusser, Jr. was with his parents and their friends Friday evening, enjoying a night out at the Wasabi Japanese Steakhouse, a hibachi style restaurant where the cook prepares the meal in front of a table of guests. ... 'He asked K.J. if he was 21 and K.J. said yes and opened his...
Surviving The Lockout: Boris Diaw's Extreme Umbrella Commercial
Today was payday. November 15th was to see players receive 1/12th of their 2011-2012 contracts, but with nuclear winter coming on, they're out the equivalent of a month's salary—$220,000 on average. Actually losing money for the first time is hard on some players, like Samardo Samuels....
The Website For NBA Players Association Now Reads "Error 404: Basketball Not Found"
Of course, it's not representative of a real computer error; just a human failure to make a labor agreement that would provide professional basketball to a fan base that is growing more and more impatient and resigned to the fact that we may, very well, be without a season this year. Thus:...
NBA Talks Break Off; Players Will Disband Union; Everything Is Awful
Billy Hunter says the players have rejected the league's latest offer, which he called "extremely unfair," and says the association is "prepared to file antitrust action against the NBA." They're also beginning the process of disbanding the union. From Yahoo's Adrian Wojnarowski [sic'd]: "The chance...
Penn State Students Get It Right With The "Blue Out"
A Nittany Lions football game is going to happen tomorrow, whether we're ready for it or not. It was never going to not happen, no matter how hyperbolic the calls for death penalties both literal and figurative. It would be nice if there could be more clarity to a murky situation by game day, but co...
Lockout Latest: Amar'e And Carmelo Make Adorable <i>Sesame Street</i> Appearance
Not everything that happens during the NBA lockout is bad: Delonte West makes his job applications public, Delonte West makes his broken-down Ford Bronco public, Chris Paul goes on Family Feud, and—provided that they cover up the Adidas logo on their shirts—Carmelo Anthony and Amar'e Stoudemire ge...
Derek Fisher's Broken Mic Means He Can't Tell You That Nothing Happened In NBA Negotiations
Elsewhere in the vast world of sports this evening, the NBA lockout negotiations once again came to a slow, painful halt after close to 12 hours of meetings. Once union president Derek Fisher got his microphone working, he had this to say:...
Penn State Fans Plan "Blueout" For Saturday's Game To Protest Child Abuse
The official Penn State football Facebook page is endorsing a blueout for the Nebraska game. All fans are asked to wear blue, the color of the Blue Ribbon Campaign to raise awareness for all forms of child abuse. They will wear blue and they will cheer Paterno. This is, of course, madness, and the t...
Paper Illustrates Joe Frazier Tribute With Massive Photo Of George Foreman
The South China Morning Post, Hong Kong's largest English-language newspaper, wasn't able to run its Joe Frazier tribute until today. All that lead-up wasn't enough time for someone who knows what Joe Frazier looks like to proof the pages....
LeBron Dunks, Mean Mugs, Refuses Lady's High-Five
LeBron played in Rudy Gay's charity all-star game just outside of Memphis last night. He scored 43 points and, as he tends to do, made no new friends at the DeSoto Civic Center in Southaven, Miss. There might be a lockout underway, but worry not, heathens: Together, we will still find ways to mock...
Bill Clinton Cameoed At Today's Fruitless Lockout Negotiations
Let's take a brief respite from Penn State-related news to check in on the second-most miserable topic in today's sports coverage: the NBA lockout! If you've been following even from afar lately, you probably know that Bobcats owner Michael Jordan ruffled some feathers last week when he emerged as...
ShortCenter: Definitive Nonsense On A Variety Of Topics
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....
Stephon Marbury Has An Opinion About Michael Jordan And The Lockout That Makes Perfect Sense
Michael Jordan has taken a lot of grief since he emerged, in a twist that should surprise nobody, as the leader of a group of hard-ass NBA owners knifing away at the revenue pie. Now he's taking grief from whatever fun-house PC bang Stephon Marbury has decamped to these days. I'll leave the parsing ...
Andrei Arlovski Hasn't Knocked Out A Top Fighter In Years, But Good Lord Did He Knock Out This Guy
There was a time when Andrei Arlovski stirred fear in the hearts of other heavyweight fighters. That time was in 2005, before the world discovered that Arlovski's jaw had the consistency of a tortilla chip. A few years later, Arlovski suffered several hideous knockouts, the kind where you'd litera...
Ron Washington Told The Rangers To "Motherfuck Golf" In An Expletive Laced Pre-Game Speech Before Game 7 Against The Cardinals
Hours after losing game 6 in dramatic fashion and moments before sending his team out on the field for a decisive game 7, Ron Washington delivered this expletive and NSFW laden pre-game speech. Audio via Joe Sports Fan. ...
David Stern Issues Late-Night Ultimatum; NBA Players Set To Reject Latest Proposal
NBA players and owners negotiated well into last night and only stopped when Commissioner David Stern got pissed and issued an ultimatum after the players rejected the latest proposal....
Michael Jordan The Player Would've Hated Michael Jordan The Hardline Owner
Over at SB Nation, Tom Ziller has compiled some of Michael Jordan's contradictory views on the NBA lockout. In a meeting during the '98 lockout, for example, Jordan the player told Wizards owner Abe Pollin, "If you can't make it work economically, you should sell the team." Ziller points out that in...
Low-Budget Pitbull Imitator Produces Nauseating "Do The Mark Sanchez" Video
There aren't too many lyrics here, other than "do the Mark Sanchez," and "heart of a champion," so it's hard to dispute their words with statistical evidence. (Of note: the call-and-response here is "Who's number one?" "We number one!" But "we" could really be the Jets or the performers.) Mark San...
Kevin Durant Is The New Redskins Quarterback...On A Trading Card
Kevin Durant's dominating performance at an intramural flag football game at Oklahoma State earlier this week has a lot of people asking "What if?" All of those people work for the Panini Group, the Italian collectibles giant that makes trading cards and bought Donruss two years ago. What if Durant ...
This Evening: Instead Of The Start Of The NBA Season, There's Chris Paul On <em>Family Feud</em>
Your p.m. roundup for Nov. 1, the day we HOLY SHIT STILETTO IMPLANTS. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....