out Page 156 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Bryant Gumbel Drops One Little Plantation Metaphor, And Everybody Loses Their Shit
You'll notice that Bryant Gumbel never once used the s-word in his criticism of David Stern last night. His extended analogy called the players "hired hands," which ought to put the lie to any suggestion that actual, literal slavery was being evoked. That hasn't stopped the usual backlash that comes...
Memphis Could Sue The NBA If It Doesn't Get Its Shit Together
In America, if you're not getting what you need quickly enough, there is always a simple back-up plan available: go to court, tie everything up in paperwork and bureaucracy, and end up with a settlement. It's almost one of our golden rules. And so it's almost a surprise that, with lockouts straining...
Here's Video Of Bryant Gumbel Calling David Stern A "Modern Plantation Overseer" On HBO's Real Sports Last Night
"His moves are intended to do little more than show how he's the one keeping the hired hands in their place." [The Basketball Jones, via Pro Basketball Talk]...
When I Dance They Call Me Kirilenko
CSKA Moscow, Andrei Kirilenko's new professional team in Russia, had its Media Day recently. Naturally, this involved the players breaking into three groups and dancing to Muzak and outdated pop songs on a stage in a giant banquet hall somewhere in Moscow....
The Theme Of Last Night's NLCS Game Was Set When Jerry Hairston Got Bucknered At Third
Your morning roundup for Oct. 15, the day we totally realized that Tums commercial with a randy corn dog is really a work of dong-involved artistry. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Local Girl Scouts Will Have A Pajama Party At Cowboys Stadium, Which Is Apparently Different From A Tony Romo Start
Tipster Patrick sends along notice that there will be the first ever PJ party on the Cowboys Stadium field this evening, beginning at 6 p.m. Dallas time....
David Stern's "Gut" Is Ruining Christmas For Everyone
The games that you will probably not be watching on Christmas this year are Celtics-Knicks, Heat-Mavs, and Bulls-Lakers, because even though it is only mid-October, the NBA lockout has already ruined Christmas for that small group of people for whom Christmas is about watching three over-hyped NBA g...
Today In Pollyannaish Things Written About The NBA Lockout: Only Michael Jordan Can Save Us
Here is the thing that's sometimes hard to grasp when games are being canceled and no end is in sight: everybody wants the lockout to end. No one is actively being greedy or selfish just because they hate you and don't want you to watch basketball. Both sides have demands and one side or both are go...
Rajon Rondo Goes No-Look, Over The Head, Makes Us Demand The NBA Come Back
Playing for something called the Big Blue All-Stars, Rajon Rondo and friends (including Brandon Knight, Kenneth Faried and Jodie Meeks) are touring Kentucky, making fools of local college teams. In Monday's game, Rondo found Faried with a no-look lob that embarrassed Union College so hard, it came ...
Italian Club Invokes MLK In Letter Begging Obama To Send Kobe Over
Just over a week ago, the Italian basketball club Virtus Bologna reported that it was working "very intensely" with Kobe Bryant's representatives to bring the Lakers star overseas during the NBA lockout. There were multiple points at which it was "almost a done deal." This week, the almost-done-deal...
The Delayed Start Of The NBA Season Gets The Taiwanese Animation Treatment
In Taiwanese animators's perception of the current NBA lockout, commissioner David Stern wields a chainsaw, cries when the Detroit Pistons flat-line in a hospital bed, guards Derek Fisher and gay marries Time Warner Cable. Also, LeBron James wears a lil-boy crown and gets shattered-backboard dunke...
Amar'e Stoudemire Suggests That Locked-Out NBA Players Could Start A League Of Their Own
Ever since the final round of negotiations ended unsuccessfully on Monday night, the NBA players have been goin' rogue in the only way that they know how: With Twitter tirades! Oh, and also with media circuits to help push their personal sneakers so that their bank accounts stay flush throughout the...
The NBA Lockout Caused Two Cameramen To Fight In Traffic
We all have our low points. If we are lucky, those low points are not caught on camera and then shared across The Internet. These two men—reportedly cameramen who were waiting out the NBA negotiations last night—were not so lucky. Here they are, assuming the boxing stances they learned from their ...
Steve Spurrier Kicks Reporter Out Of Press Conference, Announces Dismissal Of QB Stephen Garcia, Drops The Mic
At the start of his weekly press conference today—and just about an hour before announcing that former starting QB Stephen Garcia had been dismissed from the team—South Carolina football coach Steve Spurrier made an announcement to the gathered reporters. He would not, he explained, go through wit...
Let The NBA Lockout Last Forever; Drew Gooden's Got Chicken Wings To Sell
The Bucks' Drew Gooden is opening four new Wingstop restaurants in the Orlando area. "I did lot of research on different franchises," he says, before admitting he really wanted to own a Five Guys Burgers but there were none available. Wings are good too. [Orlando Business Journal]...
South Africa To Miss Out On Africa Cup Of Nations After Deliberately Playing To Boring 0-0 Draw
The South African national soccer team intentionally played to a 0-0 draw against Sierra Leone this past Saturday, and then danced across the field in celebration of having qualified for the 2012 Africa Cup of Nations. The problem: Bafana Bafana, as the team is known, had not qualified for the 2012 ...
SprtsCntr: Winning Over Hearts, Minds, And Hannah Storm's Fist
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....
Kenyon Martin Would Like All Of His Haters To "Catch Full Blown AIDS And Die!"
A veteran of 11 NBA seasons, Kenyon Martin has no doubt encountered a hater or two in his travels throughout the league. One might thus assume he's conditioned himself to keep whatever negativity that gets hurled his way from truly bothering him. But one would be wrong....
Grading NBA Players On Their "LET US PLAY" Twitter Pleas
Today is last day the NBA lockout can end without missing games. Too bad. The lockout isn't ending, despite the social media screeching of various union members. The NBPA thankfully has retweeted much of that screeching solidarity. Here's how we classify it....
Unlucky Biker Gets Jacked Up By An Antelope
Evan van der Spuy was expecting a quiet little race through a South African game reserve over the weekend. He'd get some exercise, maybe win some prize money, maybe even see some animals!...