out Page 181 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Massachusetts Girls Soccer Coach Resigns Over Hilarious, Possibly Insane Email
If George Patton had coached a girls soccer team, he probably would have run things this way; only without so many references to red meat. Meet Michael Kinahan, ex-coach of the Scituate, Mass. Green Death....

Who Is This Dashing Soccer Player, And Why Is He Using His Hands?
Hint: He now makes millions playing a different sport, and once dated Scarlett Johansson and Jessica Biel. Yes, it's Derek Jeter, whose mom once again forgot to bring the post-game orange slices....

Alyssa Milano Admits To Prematurely Hopping On/In Bed With the Carl Pavano Bandwagon
"This was right after he won the World Series. So he was kind of baseball royalty. It was before he came to the Yankees...and became the Carl Pavano you know." [HHR]...

Schilling Finally Talks About His Retirement ... On A Video Game Site
Pitcher waited for Game Developers Conference in San Francisco to announce his decision, because he didn't want to deal with "the phone ringing off the hook. It was just a natural fit." [Sports Radio Interviews.com]...

South Carolina: Still Rebelling
You probably thought everyone down in South Carolina gave up on that Confederate flag controversy years ago, but....you're wrong! They still fly it proudly no matter how many NCAA tournament games don't get played there....

I'll Just Drift With The Current For Awhile. What Could Possibly Go Wrong?
In the most foolhardy boating stunt since the canoe scene in Last of the Mohicans, a guy named Pedro drops a world record 127 feet over a waterfall in a kayak in Brazil. [Daily Mail]...

The Few. The Proud. The Lingerie'd.
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

This Man Will Absolutely Destroy You On The Mat
Congenital amputee, Kyle Maynard, to fight in MMA match? Sure. Why not. April 25,2009. In Auburn, Alabama at "Auburn Fight Night." Screw the laws of nature. Good for you, Kyle. [MMA Fighting.co]...

Adrian Peterson Will Not Save Your Community College Football Program
This just in: Adrian Peterson is not donating $150,000 to save the North Iowa Area Community College football program, as was reported on Friday. Also, there is no Batman. Sorry everyone....

Tommy Lasorda Can Do This Interview In His Sleep
Tommy Lasorda has an impressive amount of energy for a man his age, but he does seem a little lethargic in this interview—and by lethargic, I mean, he can barely hold his own head up....

What Madonna Song Had A-Rod Freaking Out To The Details Magazine Writer?
It wasn't long after Alex Rodriguez had completed his interview with Details magazine writer Jason Gay that he began having second thoughts about something he said. Was it about steroids? That goofy photo shoot? Um, no....

Working The New Orleans Hornets Halftime Show Is Just Humiliating And Painful
On Tuesday night, the New Orleans Hornets had another halftime spectacle go horribly awry. One of their French Quarter Flyers completely destroyed his ankle during a routine. Photo after the jump — if you dare....

White House Bracketology: Who Would Lincoln Have Picked? (With Update)
Attention citizens: We now have a national NCAA Tournament bracket (and ESPN is involved, naturally). Please adjust your office pools accordingly....

The Glorious Return Of Fred Hickman
Rejoice, Braves fans. Fred Hickman, the man who set the ESPN record for absenteeism while a member of the WWL, is coming to your town. Until he inevitably gets fired, of course....

ESPN's EIC Takes Pride In Candace Parker Cover, Boob Lede
WNBA.com caught up with ESPN The Mag EIC Gary Belsky to discuss the cover story on Candace Parker and that infamous "C cup" lede that's gotten some people fired up...

Carter Gaddis' New Blog Is Off To A Rousing Start
Our only regret is that he didn't live to witness Subway's "Five-Dollar Foot-Long" ad campaign. Here's the late Geremi Gonzalez and his classic penis prank, brought to you via Tampa Bay Baseball Outsider....

Florida Kid Uses YouTube For Good, Not Evil
It's a cold world out there in these hard economic times, especially in the world of hockey. But meet Ben Gullett, who whipped up a unique scheme to help find his dad a new job....

Seattle And The Mariners: It's True Love (For Now)
Mariners fans line up in the rain for tickets to opening day, which sell out in 55 minutes. It's all for you, Mariner Moose. [King 5]...

Jamar Smith And His Alcohol-Monitoring Bracelet Find Redemption
Illinois-Purdue's just started. If you're like me - self-lacerating Illinoisan who masochistically dwells on the crap hands fate and Bruce Pearl have dealt us - you're wondering about Jamar Smith. Wonder no more....

Tall Order For Soccer-Playing Waitress
A 22-year-old waitress from Watsonville, Calif. with little playing experience is among tryout finalists for the FC Gold Pride, one of seven teams in the new Women's Professional Soccer league. [San Jose Mercury]...