out Page 192 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
South Park, Cheating, And You
“In America, it’s OK to cheat as long as you cheat your way to the top.” What does Stand and Deliver have in common with Bill Belichick? South Park explains....
About Last Night
What you missed while deploying the awesome might of The Bathroom Ninja ... • NHL: Flightless Sea Fowl go up 1-0, as Roberts flipper slaps Senators once again. • MLB: Mmmmm, Pie. Cubs beat Pirates 6-4 in a mere 15 innings. • NFL: Favre laying groundwork for comeback with Packers? Of course he is....
Steely McDrunky
In even more startling DUI news, Pittsburgh police have arrested one of the men who played Pittsburgh Steelers horrifying mascot, Steely McBeam....
About Last Night
What you missed while getting in some early torch protesting ... • College women's basketball: Tennessee's Candace beats Stanford's Candice for NCAA title. • College men's basketball: Where's the Love, UCLA? Love, Collison, to enter pro draft. • NBA: I never promised you a Rose Quarter ... Blazers e...
Roy Williams' Divided Loyalties
As we continue to come to terms with a planet that has Bill Self as a national championship coach — we fully expect to see the Official NCAA Title Toupee on sale soon — we turn our attention to the Jayhawks' newest fan: North Carolina coach Roy Williams....
About Last Night
What you missed while inventing a bike while drunk ... • College basketball: The free throw, she no go in so good. Kansas 75, Memphis 68, OT. • MLB: Walk-off grand slam? Cooool. Angels 6, Indians 4. • NFL: David Garrard signs seven-year, $60 million deal with Jaguars; will still be 12th quarterback ...
Seriously, This Is Getting Ridiculous
The photos of Roy Williams signing the belly of a Hooters girl provide a cute, funny moment for Kansas fans and other Williams detractors who may think a man of such coaching stature should not be hanging around with the jiggly-boobed wing-servers. But perhaps even more fascinating than that was th...
Gay Writer To Royals: Your Calendar Does Not Give Us Chubs
When the Kansas City Royals unveiled a not-so-provocative calendar featuring candid photos of their 2008 squad, it provided ample opportunity for sports bloggers to point and laugh with the usual amount of unbridled enthusiasm. The calendar, whose proceeds go toward a female self-defense program in ...
About Last Night
What you missed while the tigers were improving their record to 2-0 ... • College women's basketball: It'll be Stanford vs. Tennessee for all the Skittles, just as you predicted. • NHL: In retrospect, perhaps resting Crosby wasn't wise. • NBA: Look out, the Sonics are making their move. Seattle 151,...
About Last Night ...
What you missed, other than the diapered monkey in traffic ... • NBA: Nets playoff chances, fade to black. Detroit's bench handles New Jersey, 106-87. • MLB: Marcum zero, Smokey. Shaun Marcum retires 11 Sox in a row in Toronto's win over Boston. • Tennis: Andy Roddick loses to Nikolay Davydenko in s...
About Last Night
What you missed while inventing the bacon bra ... • NFL: No matter how many times you kill him, Brett Favre simply will not go away. • College basketball: The Biggest Loser ... Ohio State wins NIT. • Tennis: It goes to 11 ... Roddick finally beats Federer....
About Last Night
What you missed while going to the beach and using your new Super Bowl ring to signal ships ... • NFL: Owners get together and cook up a bunch of goofy new rules. Fun! • NBA: Dirk is back, which evidently the Warriors weren't expecting. Dallas 111, Golden State 86. • NHL: Penguins clinch division ti...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while being mocked for wearing a Jeff Weaver jersey ... • Yankees win final home opener of old, decaying, imposing corporate edifice. • Tennessee, Connecticut advance to women's Final Four. Their coaches have now decided to be best friends. • Peja, baby! Hornets stay atop Western Con...
Roy Williams' Cute Attempt At A Freakout, Remembered
With the North Carolina-Kansas game just a few days away, we remind you of truly one of our favorite college basketball interview moments of all time....
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
About Last Night
What you missed while blessing the Phillies' balls ... • MLB: Santana, Mets begin quest for world domination by annexing Florida Marlins, 7-2. • College women's basketball: No soup for North Carolina; LSU reaches Final Four. • College men's basketball: Stanford to lose more than 14 feet of Lopez bro...
Soccer? Gay? Whaaaaat?
Leave it up to a foreigner to figure out why Americans are so down on soccer. This snippet culled from an editorial on football.uk.com written by Marty Mercado maps out all the reasons the U.S. ignores the sport: overcommercialization, not enough scoring, too multicultural, and, of course, because i...
About Last Night
What you missed while overdosing on Mad magazine fold-ins ... • College basketball: That girl from human resources who has pictures of her cat taped to her computer and picks all the favorites every year is leading your office pool. • NBA: Whoa, big traffic jam in the West; looks like you're gonna b...
About Last Night...
What you missed while decrying the gov'mint's invasive sandcastle fines......
Earth Hour? How's About Earth 20 Minutes? Preferably During Halftime
As Awful Announcing points out, at 8 p.m. this evening the fine leafy folks at the World Wildlife Fund are asking everyone to turn off nonessential lights (does a strobe light count?) to call attention to climate change. Of course, they couldn't've asked us to do that in, say, mid-February when the...