out Page 216 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

About Last Night ...
What you missed while finally making use of that University of Miami degree (sorry)... • NFL: Bengals 13, Ravens 7. That guy on the commercial who drafted T.J. Houshmandzadeh was right — even though he couldn't pronounce the name. • Horse racing: Russell Baze provides news that doesn't involve Barba...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while unpacking your horse, which finally arrived in the mail ... • College basketball: Well, that didn't last long. Ohio State now No. 1 in only two things. • NBA: Knicks win! Knicks win! Wee! • NHL: So it turns out that Tuomo Ruutu is not a character in a Rudyard Kipling novel. Our...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while inventing the Opti-Grab ... • NHL: Pronger returns to Edmonton, gets booed, Ducks win in OT. Sounds like fun to us. • College basketball: Greivis Bodily Injury ... Led by Greivis Vasquez, Maryland ends Illinois' 51-game non-conference home winning streak. • NBA: Who's Crying No...

'Sir, Perhaps We Can Resolve Our Differences With A Friendly Game Of Scrabble'
We've been following the Clemson-South Carolina football bet killing very closely, as only now are telling details being leaked to the press. Instead of going over the original story again, we'll just mention that a 42-year-old guy named Jimmy shot a 43-year-old man named Ricky in the chest becaus...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while contemplating your underwear ... • NFL: Hey, aren't the Packers supposed to have the advantage in snow? • College basketball: The Wolfpack cannot be stopped! All opponents are meat. • NHL: Kings make a mockery of the power play, still beat Devils in OT....

Could Have Been Worse ... Could Have Been Christmas Lights
And for the fourth straight year, the family volleyball portion of Ted Nugent's birthday barbeque is completely ruined ......

"The Road To Glendale Is Paved With Trojans!"
An aggressively active weekend of college football has sussed a few things out, and before you know it, we'll be fully ensconced in the morass of meaningless bowls hosted by dying dot-coms. (Our two favorite bowl games this year: The San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl and R&L Carriers New...

Yet Another Death You Can Blame On Steve Spurrier
In honor of the great Simpsons statement against seven-day waiting periods to buy weapons — "But I'm mad NOW!" — we present a distinct moment in college football history: The time a 42-year-old guy named Jimmy shot a 43-year-old man named Ricky in the chest because of a $20 bet on the Clemson-South ...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while breaking out the snowboard and injuring several small bones ... • NFL: Colts' magic number is 1; Eagles begin AJ Feely era. • Motor sports: Being a double amputee didn't stop Alex Zanardi; it was the damn car. • NHL: Your Teppo Numminen weekend update: He scores, kind of, as Sa...

About Last Night...
• College Football: USC 44, Notre Dame 24. Charlie Weis opted for the Belichickian sweatshirt last night. It didn't help. • NBA: Pistons 115, Wizards 111. The Pistons' last nine points were on Chauncey Billups free throws. He was 18-of-19 from the line for the game. • College Basketball: Kansas 82, ...

About Last Night...
• College Basketball: Butler 79, Gonzaga 71. Butler can make a pretty good case for being ranked #1 this week. • College Football: LSU 31, Arkansas 26. Arkansas QB Casey Dick: 3-of-17, 29 yards, 1 TD, 1 INT. Limp. • NBA: Jazz 114, Lakers 108. Andrei Kirilenko does what our legal system can't and loc...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while looking for an enormous frying pan ... • NFL: Tony Romo, you're our hero. Dallas stuffs Tampa Bay, 38-10. • College basketball: NIT finals ... all Bulldogs, baby! • NHL: Canada looks to strengthen laws against hockey Predators....

Imagine How All The Teams Who Play The Redskins Feel
We try not to bring any political correctness, or politics in general, around here, because sports are supposed to be fun, and politics is not fun and just makes people angry. But we couldn't help but think this was a little silly. The athletic director at Dartmouth published a letter in the student...

About Last Night ...
What to watch as you wonder what ever happened to Kramer's NYU Intern, Darin ... • College basketball: And somewhere, Al McGuire is ... well, he's probably watching "CSI: Miami." No. 13 Marquette 73, No. 9 Duke 62. • NBA: NOOCH Ado About Nothing ... It was just another day at the office for Peja Sto...

Five Tiny Tidbits On: The SEC West
Thought we were done previewing things? How could you think that, with your NCAA Basketball Tournament office pool a mere four months away? You've got to start studying now if you want to tame the royal trouser predator. So who's with me? Let's Gooo! Send tips on your favorite team to tips@deadspin....

It Is Important To Keep Tony Banks Fed
It's important to remember your duties as the wife of an NFL quarterback. You're required to show up at charity functions, look the other way on those road trips, make sure your eye makeup is spackled on and, of course, making sure your fumbling, erratic husband is properly fed. Eventually, they'll ...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while suddenly watching your "Seinfeld" reruns a bit differently ... • NFL: It's clear that the Giants went into this thing with no exit strategy ... • NBA: Rock on, Mavericks. Rock on, Mark. • NHL: Happy Feat ... Crosby's milestone leads Penguins over Flyers 5-3....

Five Tiny Tidbits On: The SEC East
Thought we were done previewing things? How could you think that, with your NCAA Basketball Tournament office pool a mere five months away? You've got to start studying now if you want to storm the Bastille. So who's with me? Let's Gooo! Send tips on your favorite team to [email protected]....

About Last Night ...
What you missed while trying not to make eye contact with that Eagles fan from your office ... • NFL: Schottenheimer is still screaming at Igor Olshansky, and Tomlinson kind of rules, doesn't he? Chargers 35, Broncos 27. • College basketball: It's not exactly Princeton-Georgetown 1989, but anyway, O...

About Last Night...
• College Football: LSU 23, Ole Miss 20. Oh, to have heard what Ed Orgeron was saying when this picture was snapped. • NBA: Utah 120, Phoenix 117. Someone named Paul Millsap had 16 points, six of them in the overtime period, to go along with his 10 rebounds. • College Basketball: Nebraska 73, (25) C...