out Page 226 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
About Last Night...
• NHL Playoffs: Sharks 3, Oilers 6. It was probably a strange morning for you if you fell asleep in the 2nd period while the Sharks were kicking back with a comfortable 3-1 lead....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while keeping it real ... • NHL Playoffs: It's a team named after a crappy movie, whose mascot is better known for selling auto health insurance. But it is also a team in the Western Conference Finals after a 4-1 win over Colorado. Well played, Anaheim. • MLB: Braves treat Willis lik...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while starting an hour late ... • MLB: I'm stuck on you, sweetie pie ... Bonds still at 713 as Cubs beat Giants 8-1. • NBA Playoffs: Oh right, we're bigger than them. Clippers finally get rough, even series with Suns after 122-97 win. • NHL Playoffs: It took three overtimes, but Oile...
Random YouTube Finding Of The Week
As always, we reiterate that if you can't find something fascinating on YouTube, you're not even trying....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while trying to guess the plot of The Simpsons movie ... • NHL: Red Wings beat Oilers 2-0 to clinch home-ice advantage, as Detroit is all of a sudden king of the professional sports world. • MLB: Mets beat Nationals 7-1 in boring, no-beanball affair. • Soccer: Donovan, Meola have rec...
About Last Night ...
What you missed during your rampaging crime spree ... • NBA: Anthony scores 28 as Nuggets clinch first division title since Chia Pets, Doogie Howser and Richard Marx were popular. • NHL: Ovechkin does it! Sixth rookie to score 100 points, as Caps beat Bruins 2-1. Hey wake up eh, I'm givin' hockey hi...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while realizing it's unlikely your fellow mobsters will keep your little leather secret quiet ... • Masters: Mickelson wins second green jacket in three years, but what's the deal with that mullet? • NHL: Hey kids, it's that other New Jersey winning streak — Devils beat Rangers for s...
About Last Night...
• Boxing: Floyd Mayweather Jr. wins unanimous decision over Zab Judah. Someone gets hit in the balls on America's Funniest Home Videos, and everyone laughs. It happens in a boxing match, and people flip out. Go figure....
At Least You Aren't Shawn Bradley
...and no one's making "NBA Bitches, Volume One" videos, starring you. So no matter what else happens today, at least you have that going for you. You probably aren't going to get dunked on today, and even if you do, it's not likely that anyone's going to make a YouTube video out of it....
About Last Night...
• MLB: Red Sox 14, Orioles 8. Daniel Cabrera's line for the Orioles: 1.1 IP, 3 hits, 7 runs, 7 walks, 1 strikeout, and an ERA higher than Kobe Bryant's points per game....
About Last Night ...
What you missed as your approval rating at home dipped below 35 percent ... • NBA: Nets, who may never lose again, win 14trh straight behind Kidd, Jefferson. • MLB: Now this is what we're talkin' about — threats, beanballs, Pedro Martinez wins first start ... it's what Mets vs. Nationals should be. ...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while tearfully writing your very last love letter to Katie Couric ... • MLB: Rollins hit streak to 38, but Phils lose to Cards 4-3. Come on, people! Where's the love for Rollins? • NBA: Knicks top Cavs to end nine-game losing streak, but Larry Brown still isn't buying any new proper...
Random YouTube Finding Of The Week
As always, it's amazing what you can find on YouTube....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while trading in your wife for a donkey ... • Women's College Basketball: Shell Game — Maryland Terrapins take first national title, beating Duke in OT. • NBA: So the Nets are good now? Who new? New Jersey's 13th straight win clinches Atlantic Division title. • MLB: Dodgers' first ...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while toasting your buns ... • NCAA Tournament: Noah's Arc — Gators capture first national title, stopping Bruins 73-57. • MLB: Well, it didn't take long for A-Rod, Big Unit to establish Yankees as the alpha male of the AL. • NHL: Controversy abounds as Sabres clinch playoffs with wi...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while having all kinds of troubles trying to sell your late father's sanitation business ... • Women's College Basketball: Turtle Mania! Maryland upends No. 1 UNC to reach NCAA title game. Will take on Duke. • NBA: And they call it the streak ... Carter's 43 lead Nets to 12th straigh...
About Last Night...
• NBA: Wizards 99, Spurs 106. Hey, a competitive basketball game. What a novel idea....
About Last Night...
• Grapefruit League: Cardinals 9, Mets 6. Albert Pujols goes deep three times, forcing the entire roster of my fantasy team to weep in jealousy....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while standing in line to buy the latest Paris Hilton rap CD... • College Basketball: South Carolina wins second straight NIT Tournament title, first time that's happend since 1943-44, for whatever that's worth. • Exhibition Baseball: Bonds receives standing ovation in first plate ap...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while making phone calls in the nude ... • NBA: LeBron's 46 lead Cavs past Mavs. Cleveland's in the playoffs! The next round's on Drew Carey, everyone! • NHL: Jagr takes care of business — he helps Rangers beat Islanders, breaks scoring record, sets retirement plans (hear that, Favre...