out Page 234 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
About Last Night
What you missed while federal prosecutors held you down and probed for leaks ... • World Series, Game 4: ChiSox beat Astros to win it all. And suddenly, you realize that summer is over. • NHL: Blue Jackets hand Predators first loss of season, and yes, we realize that five years ago that sentence wou...
About Last Night
What you missed while addressing all those envelopes containing the indictments ... • World Series, Game 3: White Sox prevail over Astros in 14 innings in a game you turned off after 13 innings. That'll teach you. • NBA: Chris Webber looks crappy, Allen Iverson missing altogether in Sixers' exhibiti...
About Last Night
What you missed while translating the Bible from English to German and back to English again ... • MNF: Testaverde fumbles three times, loses his keys and forgets where he lives as Falcons clobber Jets. • NHL: Red Wings make Blue Jackets wish the strike had lasted a bit longer. • NHL: Hurricanes dea...
About Last Night
What you missed while trying to convince Mayor McCheese that, with the right backing, he could be the next governor ... • World Series, Game 2: The Posednik Adventure sinks Astros, puts White Sox ahead 2-0. • NASCAR: Jeff Gordon wins Subway 500, celebrates by holding up an enormous pair of pants. • ...
About Last Night
What you missed while choosing just the right pumpkin ... to murder! • NHL: Islanders sweep Rangers despite Jagr's hat trick, and yes, Satan scored again. • College FB: Maryland chases Vick around for a while, finally gives up as Virginia Tech wins. • PGA: Hunter Haas leading at Funai Classic, Charl...
About Last Night ...
A pair of underpants revolves slowly on the blade of a ceiling fan, your dog is wearing a sombrero and you are curled up, naked, around your TV, fast asleep. Congratulations, Astros fan ... • NLCS, Game 6: Astros win the pennant! Astros win the pennant! And it may be time finally to retire the lyric...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while comically chasing gophers with a mallet ... • NBA: Lakers' Brown gets revenge on the Wizards, but it's an exhibition game, so let's not get too excited. • NHL: Gretzky coaches Coyotes to win in his return to Edmonton, and we're officially sick of this story already. • Thierry H...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while testing your bear-proof suit ... • NLCS, Game 5: Admit it, you turned the game off long Pujols homered. Unless you're an Astros fan. In which case ... sorry. Ouch. • MNF: Colts go 6-0 after 45-28 win over Rams, which we mention because nobody really watches Monday Nigh Football...
Anybody Recovered From The USC Game Yet?
Honestly, you just know Nick Lachey was wetting his pants in South Bend on Saturday. We still haven't quite come down from the high of USC's thrilling 34-31 victory over Notre Dame, a game that somehow made everyone on both teams into a legend. Most of the Notre Dame fans we know aren't even angry...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while boozing it up with floozies on Lake Minnetonka ... • Once every 46 years, whether you're ready for them or not — White Sox in World Series after taming Angels. • Astros, up 3-1 on Cardinals, poised for first-ever World Series, but it's still not as exciting as that time the Bad...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while dusting the top of the Chrysler Building (damn court-ordered community service) ... • NLCS, Game 2: Oswalt, Astros even series with Cards at 1-all — but you knew that, because it was the only game on last night. • NHL: Rangers end losing streak, led by Swedish rookie (there's a...
The Dirty Sheets Of South Bend
People are so excited about the USC-Notre Dame game this weekend that even travel arrangements are making the news. The fine folks at HotelChatter have taken a look at one of the worst hotels near Touchdown Jesus you could possibly find, the Knight's Inn South Bend, where one guest checked into th...
Will The Boss Rock Touchdown Jesus?
We keep hearing about all these rumors, so since we are who we are, we might as well publish them. Whispers abound all around South Bend that tomorrow's pep rally for the Notre Dame game against the undefeated USC Trojans — recently moved from the Joyce Center to Notre Dame Stadium — will feature ...
About Last Night ...
What You Missed While Trying Get Rid Of That Sticky Film That Just Won't Rinse Away • ALCS, Game 2: Doug Eddings, folks — the next Don Denkinger. Thanks for hastening in instant replay, you pinhead. • ALCS, Game 2: Oh, also, the White Sox beat the Angels 2-1 to even the series. • NLCS, Game 1: Sande...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while fishing people out of Boston Harbor ... • ALCS, Game 1: California/Anaheim/Los Angeles Angels remind us why White Sox haven't won the big one since 1917. • NHL: Jeff O'Neal honors late brother with winning goal for Maple Leafs. • NHL: Senators on a roll, grab fourth straight wi...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while rolled up in a carpet, trying to enter the U.S. illegally posing as an immense burrito ... • ALDS: Yankees ousted by Angels, Steinbrenner eyes Larry Brown as possible replacement for Joe Torre. • MNF: Tiny Steelers' kicker Jeff Reed boots winning field goal, later removes thorn...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while boarding up the house to keep out the undead ... • ALDS: Game 4: Yankees force Game 5 in Los Angeles tonight, Giambi exchanges steroids for caffeine. • NLDS, Game 4: Chris Burke — not from "Life Goes On," so stop asking — ends epic 18-inning duel over Braves, launches Astros in...
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch as mice gather in your attic for their annual convention ... • College FB: Syracuse at Connecticut. Big East showdown in which you'll meet your next Jets quarterback, UConn's Matt Bonislawski. [ESPN2] • ALDS, Game 3: White Sox at Red Sox. ChiSox are gonna party like it's 1917. [ESPN2] ...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while watching the comedy stylings of Gallagher from beneath a tarp ... • NLDS: They partied like it was 1999, literally; Smoltz outduels Clemens as Braves tie series with Astros 1-all. • NLDS: Conventional weapons are useless against him: Mulder shakes off line drive to the arm to p...
Oh, The Fun They'll Have
According to Sports By Brooks and KMPC Radio in Los Angeles, now that college football expert Nick Lachey and non-sports-related wife Jessica Simpson have reportedly split up (or maybe not), Lachey might actually be moving in with Southern Cal quarterback Matt Leinart. (We're going to assume he do...