over Page 37 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
With New OT Rules, Demaryius Thomas Didn't Realize The Game Was Over
So, this new playoff overtime. It's more fair, but it's also confusing. This is because hypotheticals are confusing, and I would rather have Phil Simms orgasm an explanation after the fact than have to keep in mind multiple scenarios while the game is still going on. The new, non-sudden death OT can...
Brock Lesnar Just Retired From UFC. Here's Why (And The Official Announcement)
Here's the shot from Alistair Overeem that knocked Brock Lesnar out of UFC (along with Lesnar's announcement that made it official). The announcement seems to have come a fight too late, given how miserably Lesnar managed to defend himself against Overeem's strikes. Bon voyage, real-then-fake-then-r...
Former Security Director Sues NBA, Claims League Fired Him After Blowing The Whistle On Sexual Harassment
In June, NBA security official Warren Glover received a gold watch and a letter from David Stern celebrating his 10 years with the league. A month later, he was fired, the highest-level NBA employee to be let go during the lockout. Glover says it was retribution for speaking up against repeated inst...
Low-Level Sources Close To Pumpkin Ron Washington Say That Pumpkin Ron Washington Is Not Racist, Still Awaiting Word From Pumpkin
An email, received in 24-point font:...
BREAKING: LOCKOUT TALKS BREAK DOWN, ACCORDING TO HIGH-LEVEL EMPLOYEES ACTUALLY INVOLVED IN NEGOTIATIONS
DATELINE—A NICE HOTEL Negotiations between the players and the league broke off without an agreement this afternoon. Neither side is willing to budge on the BRI split: the players are firm at 52 percent, the owners at 50. No talks are scheduled, though both sides hope to meet again this weekend. We ...
Texas Pumpkins Accused Of Racism Over Ron Washington Blackface Costumes
Two Dallas-area pumpkins have caused a stir over their costume choices for local Halloween contests. The pumpkins, one from Irving-based 21st Century Dental (left) and the other a part of the Dawson & Sodd law firm in Corsicana (right), showed up to a statewide "pumpkin contest" dressed in the offen...
BREAKING: NBA LOCKOUT JUST ABOUT OVER, ACCORDING TO LOW-LEVEL TEAM EMPLOYEES WITH EMAIL ACCESS
After four months, the NBA lockout is in its dying throes, according to multiple team employees who have been informed by the league that business as usual will resume as early as Monday....
Bernard Hopkins Is Pleased He Has His WBC Championship Belt Back
"The World Boxing Council on Thursday ruled Chad Dawson did not defeat light-heavyweight champion Bernard Hopkins by technical knockout, as officials working the Saturday fight at Staples Center ruled. Instead, the WBC ruled the outcome was a technical draw, allowing Hopkins, 46, to keep his belt. ...
Bryan Stow Has Left The Hospital
It's great that Bryan Stow is getting transferred from a hospital to a long-term rehabilitation center more than six months after getting beaten into a coma outside Dodger Stadium. Especially when the San Francisco Chronicle story about it contains this vignette:...
California Teen Who Required Brain Surgery After Football-Related Concussion Released From Hospital
After Adrian Padilla, a senior safety with the Oxnard, Cal. high-school football team, suffered a serious concussion during a game last month, he collapsed on the sideline and ultimately required emergency brain surgery....
More Overwrought Fantasy Emails: Joe's Going To Carve You Up, Drink Your Blood, Rape Your Sister, And Beat Your Mother
As we've seen with our "Life Lessons" segment, some people take sports way too seriously. But none as serious as fantasy football players. Each week, we'll feature some of the whiniest, bitchiest, nastiest, most sociopathic emails from this group of very special people so you can point and laugh at...
Bryan Stow Speaks His First Words Since Dodger Stadium Beating
Great update via the website through which Bryan Stow's family keeps the world apprised of how his recovery from a brutal beating outside Dodger Stadium is going....
The Same Ref Who Worked The Seahawks-Steelers Super Bowl Will Work This Week's Seahawks-Steelers Game
They're still not over Super Bowl XL in Seattle, especially after referee Bill Leavy admitted last year he had "kicked" a couple of calls in the fourth quarter. That Leavy was assigned to work Sunday's game will at least take the city's focus off the state of the current Seahawks for a while. [PFT,...
At Least Four Arizona State Fans Went To Last Night's Game In Blackface
Your morning roundup for Sept. 10, a day when it's apparently illegal for wannabe vampires to bite homeless men outside the neighborhood Hooters. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
George W. Bush Will Narrate A Two-Minute Intro To An NFL Pregame Show On 9/11, And Not The Ones On CBS, NBC, Or ESPN
Via Deitsch: "Been told former President George W. Bush will narrate a 2-minute opening for Fox NFL Sunday on Sept. 11 at 12PM."...
Apologies To Andrés Cantor, But Mountain Biking Announcers Are The Craziest
Young Briton Danny Hart obliterated the best downhill mountain bikers by nearly 12 seconds this weekend at the world championships in Champery, Switzerland. Normally, Hart's performance would soon retreat back into the shadow world that is downhill mountain biking. But no. Not this day. Not if com...
If You Taunt Gary One More Time, He's Received Permission From His Wife To Fight You In Real Life
As we've seen with our "Life Lessons" segment, some people take sports way too seriously. But none as serious as fantasy football players. Each week, we'll feature some of the whiniest, bitchiest, nastiest, most sociopathic emails from this group of very special people so you can point and laugh at ...
Once-Comatose Former Swimsuit Model Becomes First Woman To Ever Enter Australian Rodeo Event
Tammara Wrenn became the first female to ever enter "the southern hemisphere's biggest rodeo, at Mt Isa in Queensland" this weekend. This is noteworthy for two reasons....
The Hidden Message Of That Andover Rap Video
The Andover rap video that made the rounds this week is tacky and annoying, yeah, but to those of us who went to the school, there's more to it than the saccharine entitlement on the surface. When my class graduated from Andover two years ago, we marveled and fretted about the place: The kids are ...
The Lady Whose Face Got Mauled By A Chimp Does Not Look Like A Lady Whose Face Got Mauled By A Chimp Anymore
The first post-face-transplant photograph of Charla Nash was released today. Nash is the woman who got "mauled by an out-of-control chimpanzee" named Travis, who was in a bunch of commercials and lived with a widow in Connecticut....