ow Page 1011 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Florida High School Pitcher Loves No-Hitters, Beef O'Brady's
Either Patrick Schuster is really good, or the high school teams in the Tampa-St. Pete area totally suck. At any rate, the Mitchell High hurler now has three consecutive no-hitters....

You Know When The Homemade Kenny Powers Jersey Looks Cool? When You're Getting Arrested
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap More...

Tony Romo's Life Just Got Upskirt And Personal
Regardless of my Eagles fandom, Tony Romo seems like a well-mannered, well-adjusted human being who just happens to be quarterback for the second most despicable team in America. (NSFW)...

Condi Rice Says Fuzzy Zoeller Is One Of Her Favorite Golfers
She wrote an essay for the Daily Beast about following Tiger at the Masters (perks) and dropped the line about Fuzzy being one of her favorites. Also, Condi's favorite comedian? Michael Richards. [The Daily Beast]...

Man Sues White Sox Over T-Shirt Cannon Attack
A violent menace is sweeping our nation's sports stadiums—rogue gangs of t-shirt wielding thugs firing 100% cotton bullets at innocent bystanders....

Don't Miss Your Best Chance To Watch College Hockey All Year
Boston takes on Miami in the National Championship at 7:00—but it's on opposite the NCAA Women's Bowling Championship on ESPN2! (Semis online now!) It's like asking to choose the favorite among my childrens! [ESPN; NCAA]...

Defeated Soccer Team Welcomed Home With Cheers, Death Threats
This Argentine squad arrived at their home airport after a rough 2-0 defeat to a Mexican team that knocked them out of a major international tournament, a loss so crushing that their manager resigned after the game. It was such a tough road environment that fans at the game in Mexico were chanting d...

Time To Get Your Chicago Pants Party Tickets
The final deadline to purchase tickets for Deadspin's Chicago Pants Party on May 23 is next Friday. If you've been procrastinating, it's time to buy. Follow the link for details and tickets. [Pants Party Details]...

Tact? ESPN.com Knows Not Of This Thing You Call "Tact"
Yesterday, Dashiell noticed an unfortunate NASCAR commercial running during ESPN's coverage of Nick Adenhart. The general consensus was to give the WWL a pass. Today, however, no dice. What the hell is wrong with ESPN.com?...

Boob-Looking Announcer Gains Redemption
Former Iowa broadcaster Ed Podolak—whose only crime was loving life—will be back in the booth for Iowa football games next fall. That is just and wise. [The Gazette]...

Programming Notes
Send along today's tips to both [email protected] and [email protected]....

All Right, I'll Attend Your Stinking Workouts
After saying that he wouldn't attend the Bills' voluntary offseason conditioning program because it was, well, voluntary, Terrell Owens changes his mind and shows up on Wednesday. [The Buffalo News]...

Ted Kennedy Still Looked Better Than Lincecum
"Thank God this isn't Deadspin, or the comments would be loaded with 1.3 retarded Massholes typing "GO SOX!!1!!!@!!!" [Wonkette]...

It's Good To Be Bill Macdonald
Fox Sports West's Bill Macdonald has been a popular LA-based broadcaster for more than 20 years. Unfortunately, Halos Heaven ran some photos of him getting cozy with a young woman outside of Angels Stadium....

Mike Florio Demands More Spanking In The NFL
It's Week 4 of the Deadcast, and we continue our extremely slow progress into something barely resembling a polished, professional broadcast. Helping the cause this week is our guest....

Dogs And Cats Have Officially Slept Together...Reilly On The B.S. Report
And they said this day would never come. Whatever feud may or may not have (allegedly) existed between Rick Reilly and the Sports Fella, it appears that rivalry has now been extinguished....

I See No Negative Safety Implications Here
If there's one thing I'm sure of, it's that the new Indoor Football League is completely safe for both players and fans. But then I'm still holding on to Enron stock....

Martellus Bennett's Blog Is A Thing Of Beauty
Martellus Bennett (no relation) is best known for his fine performance on HBO's Hard Knocks and his ability to rhyme "Romo" with "homo." Now he's a blogger....and he is awesome at it....