ow Page 990 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Dude, You're Making Out With A Dude
Football season is upon us, which means that thousands of angry, horny, feisty pretend fans will converge upon this great nation's red cup-littered parking lots to participate in traditional tailgating revelry. These are not those stories....

Chris Myers Compares Playing For Detroit To Dating Whoopi Goldberg
TMZ has the full quote from Myers, who tried to humorously correlate what it must be like for linebacker Larry Foote to go from the Super Bowl champion Steelers to the coldness of the D....

Men With Telestrators Can't Stop Drawing Dongs
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Sean Salisbury Gets Fired Hard for the Money
Yesterday we learned that Sean Salisbury was fired from his gig at a Dallas radio stadium, allegedly for more cellphone/dong photo hijinks. The Dallas Morning News spoke to Salisbury about his departure, and he tells a different story, naturally....

A Weary Nation Turns to Cornholing for Leisurely Recreation
Occasionally a sport comes along that truly defines its era. Fittingly, as Barack Obama prepares to invade the South with an army of homosexuals who will sodomize every Republican's children and pets, cornholing is suddenly all the rage....

Well Hello There Stinky Britches!
Okay, so I'm this internet creature known as Cajun Boy and I'm guest-editing this here site today. Perhaps you've seen me around on Gawker, Animal, my dumb blog, my dumb Twitter, etc. Also, I got my first tattoo last night!...

I Hope Your Team Wins At Sports This Weekend!
Thank you for letting me play in your sandbox today. I have no idea what any of you are talking about! That being said, you dudes were great. I hope it's not awkward when we run into each other later!...

Sean Salisbury Fired From Radio Station, Allegedly For More Cellphone Hijinks (Semi-Update)
Sean Salisbury was employed at Dallas radio station 105.3 (who knew!) but apparently he's already out. You'll never guess what the rumor is as to why he was let go....

Also Never Forget...Sad Mike Piazza Dressed Like Fonzie On A Rooftop
"Perched mere blocks from the smoky ruins on Sunday, Sept. 16, 2001, a distraught Mike Piazza grieved for his adopted city." Christ. [SI]...

Never Forget
So since it's THAT day, I've decided to re-run this item I wrote for the Emeritus roast extravaganza. This is our anniversary, too. Kind of. Enjoy it again, if you'd like....

The One With The Best Barry Switzer Story EVER
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....

Triumph Of Will
So many of you sent in photos capturing Leitch's brief cameo on YES (photos sent via computer of a TV screen on which a writer is staring at a computer screen) that we decided to make a pretty gallery. Enjoy!...

Rick Reilly®'s <i>SportsCenter</i> Audition Tape
No, you weren't having a nightmare. Rick Reilly co-hosted the late L.A. SportsCenter last night and it was everything you could have hoped for and more. (You were hoping for stilted camera presence and lame fatherly jokes, right?)...

Always Be Remembering 9/11 (During NASCAR Blow-Ups)
Down in Richmond, VA, today it's going to be all like, "Always— what?" (Vroom vroom sound effects.) "Always remem—huh?" Yes, the NASCAR 9-11 Ford Fusion is racing today! You will always never forget, until it crashes. (Well? NASCAR!)...

Proud Americans Are Getting Hosed For Ballpark Beer (Never Forget)
Why does baseball hate America? America is beer, and baseball hates beer-lovers....

Great Idea For A Paper Looking To Curry Favor: Hire Coach's Daughter
Not news: The Hartford Courant is planning to hire a new blogger to cover UConn women's hoops. News: said blogger's name is Alysa Auriemma. Conflict of interest much?...

Orlando Brown Allegedly Leaves His Ex-Wife Something To Remember Him By
Najeh "Deuce" Davenport was crowned the king of unlawful defecation after he took a dump in his girlfriend's laundry basket back in 2002. Now it appears the plunger has been passed to Orlando Brown, a man of even greater fiber....

Mark Whicker Has Left The Yard Before
The year was 1991. Journalist and ex-Marine Terry Anderson had just been freed after nearly seven years of captivity in Lebanon. Seven years is a long time. Luckily, a columnist named Mark Whicker was around to put it in perspective....

After Unanimous Backlash, Mark Whicker Responds
Though the column was published Monday night, Whicker's Jaycee Dugard column didn't strike the collective nerve of the Internet until today. I got in touch with the OC Register's sports editor, and here's what he and Whicker have to say....

Mark Whicker Leaves The Yard
I do not say this lightly: What you're about to read is the single worst piece of sports journalism ever committed to the page....