Always Be Remembering 9/11 (During NASCAR Blow-Ups)
Down in Richmond, VA, today it's going to be all like, "Always— what?" (Vroom vroom sound effects.) "Always remem—huh?" Yes, the NASCAR 9-11 Ford Fusion is racing today! You will always never forget, until it crashes. (Well? NASCAR!)
For those of us who saw "The Final Destination" in motherfuckin' 3D, which, obviously, is all of us present here, because seeing dumb kids die on film is definitely something we can all come together around, whether we want to do Ben What's-His-Roethles-Burger in the rear or not, we are anticipating some really gruesome irony of the 9/11 Happened To ME! variety. How is the 9/11 race car a good idea, just conceptually speaking? The whole point of 9/11 is to avoid shit blowing up, even if the Coast Guard apparently didn't get that memo. And to do some awesome tailgating.
Also isn't it kind of weak if your 9/11 car loses on 9/11? And everyone is like "Oh and then that 9/11 car came in 8th, sad, let's NEVER FORGET that."
Since here we are, let's never forget the one really awesome thing George W. Bush did.
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