owl Page 130 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Blues Ruthlessly Tormented Oilers Goalies Tonight
The St. Louis Blues should be heading to the playoffs next month, and the Oilers are definitely heading back home to lick their wounds and wonder what went wrong again this year, and the difference between those two outlooks was on full display in Missouri tonight. Blues forwards were practically la...

The Pelicans Gave The Suns A Masterclass On The Dumbest Possible Way To Lose A Basketball Game
With 7.6 seconds to go in overtime, down 136-133, Suns guard Devin Booker tried to hit a game-tying three but airballed the shot completely and gave possession back to his opponents. The Pelicans then used their final timeout—keep that in mind—to advance the ball for an inbounds play that would at l...

Cowardly High School Team Bleeds Over Two Minutes Off Clock By Standing At Half-Court
Enjoy this inspiring sports action, from Wednesday’s second-round playoff game between two Pittsburgh high school basketball teams:...

Luka Dončić Suffers Through What Must Surely Be The Worst Game Of His Career<em></em>
An hour or so before his Spurs went out and beat the Dallas Mavericks, Gregg Popovich described rookie sensation Luka Dončić as “a beautiful basketball player” and “a consummate basketball player” who “does everything.” In repayment for these lovely compliments, Dončić went out and played what he wi...

This Is Maybe The Most Depressing Play Of LeBron's Entire Career
The Lakers lost again Wednesday night, their fourth loss in a row, and eighth in ten games. Since January 1 they’re a crummy 9–19, and they’re now five games under .500 with 17 left to play, and 6.5 back of the Western Conference eighth seed. They’re dead....

76ers Subjected To Two Miserable Last-Second Losses In One Game
The 76ers lost by a point to the lowly Bulls Wednesday night, 108–107, in Chicago. Whatever. The Sixers have performed admirably during this suddenly indefinite stretch of games without Joel Embiid, and the Bulls are much better now than they were before the trade deadline, and the Sixers were on th...

The Lakers Are Exhausted And Depleted And Probably Dead
It can seem a little cheesy and cherry-picked to focus much criticism on LeBron’s play-to-play effort for these fading Lakers. For one thing, this roster is a complete mess, and the team’s on-court chemistry is currently in the toilet, and everyone is screwing up all the time. For another, LeBron is...

Sabres Lose By A Goal After Jason Pominville Rejects His Own Point-Blank Shot
In the third period of Monday night’s Oilers-Sabres tilt, with Edmonton up a goal and less than four minutes left on the clock, the puck made its way to Sabres winger Jason Pominville, in the crease, with absolutely nothing to stop him from scoring the tying goal. Nothing, that is, except for his ow...

Georgetown's James Akinjo Teaches Seton Hall's Quincy McKnight A Lesson On Actually Playing Defense After Slapping The Floor
The most important part about taunting an opponent is one’s ability to back it up when the time comes. This was not the case for Seton Hall’s Quincy McKnight in Saturday’s game against Georgetown. After scoring on a tough drive to the basket, the junior guard got back on defense to face off against ...

Georgetown's James Akinjo Teaches Seton Hall's Quincy McKnight A Lesson On Actually Playing Defense After Slapping The Floor
The most important part about taunting an opponent is one’s ability to back it up when the time comes. This was not the case for Seton Hall’s Quincy McKnight in Saturday’s game against Georgetown. After scoring on a tough drive to the basket, the junior guard got back on defense to face off against ...

Alex Len Momentarily Forgot He Was Playing Basketball While Trying To Secure A Rebound
It wasn’t until the fourth(!!) period of overtime between the Bulls and Hawks on Friday that one team started to separate itself from the other. I’m talking, of course, about the Hawks, who began to separate themselves as the worst of the two on the court with less than two minutes to go in what eve...

Alex Len Momentarily Forgot He Was Playing Basketball While Trying To Secure A Rebound
It wasn’t until the fourth(!!) period of overtime between the Bulls and Hawks on Friday that one team started to separate itself from the other. I’m talking, of course, about the Hawks, who began to separate themselves as the worst of the two on the court with less than two minutes to go in what eve...

New York Man Tried To Fake His Own Abduction To Avoid Super Bowl Payouts
New York state police found 60-year-old Robert Brandel on Wednesday afternoon with a rope tied around his neck, and duct tape around his hands and ankles while in the backseat of his Ford F-150 truck parked on a Niagara County road. ...

Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Fighter Fakes Injury, Brawls With Crowd Members Who Taunted Him For Faking Injury
Former Brazilian jiu-jitsu world champion Erbeth Santos lost his main event fight Sunday against Felipe Pena after he injured his knee during an early exchange. Santos and Pena’s anti-climatic fight capped off an exciting night of BJJ Stars action in Sao Paulo, but Santos put on a show shortly after...

Goalkeeper's Boner Overshadowed By Striker's Even Bigger Boner
Libertad goalkeeper Martín Silva must’ve thought he was the biggest idiot on the pitch when his error served up an incredibly easy scoring opportunity for Atlético Nacional forward Omar Duarte in a Copa Libertadores match Thursday night. Luckily for Silva, Duarte one-upped the keeper with an even wo...

Bulldogs Undone By Stuffed Dog In Last-Second Loss To Other Bulldogs
Wednesday night the crummy Georgia Bulldogs did very well to come back against a Mississippi State team that led in the second half by as many as 17 points, at 44–27. From that point until the final second of regulation, the home team outscored the other Bulldogs 40-23, including a clutch three-poin...

Incredibly Broke Italian Club Fields Seven Teenagers To Avoid League Expulsion, Ends Up Losing Match 20-0
Serie C Group A (Italy’s third-flight division) bottom-dwellers Pro Piacenza suffered an absolutely brutal 20-0 loss to Cuneo on Sunday after the team was only able to field the seven players required to not forfeit the match....

Sergio Ramos Became The Most Sent-Off Player In La Liga History After (Almost) Kicking A Guy In The Face
Sergio Ramos might have earned himself a week off with his latest act of shithousery. In the final minutes of Real Madrid’s match against Girona, Ramos and Girona’s Pedro Alcalá both went for a ball in the air that Casemiro headed into the middle of the penalty box. Alcalá tried to use his head to m...

The NBA Rising Stars Challenge Featured A Strong Collection Of Apathetic Highlight Attempts
The 2019 NBA Rising Stars Challenge on Friday saw Team USA defeat Team World 161-144 in a game was about as half-assed defensively as one would expect with that scoreline. But despite this crop of young NBA talent getting some of the best looks they’ve gotten all season, it didn’t prevent some of th...

The Hawks And Knicks Recreate The Basketball Equivalent Of Throwing Up In Your Mouth
The Hawks and Knicks are both currently engaged in a mad dash to the bottom of the barrel as the worst team in the league and, boy, are they doing a terrible job of not making it obvious....