owl Page 179 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Keeper Discovers That Throwing The Ball Right Into An Opponent's Head Is A Bad Idea
Technically this isn’t an own goal, since the last touch came from the striker, but it is still the most embarrassing non-own goal you’re likely to see. The keeper can raise his hand all he likes, but it’s not interference when you literally throw the ball right at the dude’s head. The video:...
Jesus Christ, Manuel Neuer, What Are You Doing?
Manuel Neuer had to be so tight standing there at midfield watching that shot, praying it wouldn’t sail into the empty net he had just ran a good 50 yards away from in a crazed and failed attempt to clear the ball. That it didn’t go in goes to show how astounding Florenzi’s wondergoal last week was....
The Jets Defense Is Ferocious
One third-quarter sequence perfectly exemplified the Jets’ 20-7 victory over the Colts Monday night: their defense is damn good, but they’re getting a bit of luck too. ...
This Punt Was Bad, But The Coverage Was Worse
Kent State has somehow managed to stay close with Minnesota today, but if the Golden Flashes don’t improve their punt team, they’re in for a world of hurt; this punt was a disaster....
Bird Released Into Wild, Flies Directly Into Glass Wall, Likely Perishes
Oh noooooooo my God...
Marco Rubio's Boy Kinda Punched Rand Paul's Boy In The Face Last Night
Politics, like rap music, is sports. In the throes of competition, tempers flare as the blood gets hot. There’s always some beef. Sometimes, separate parties arrive at blows. Rarely, there’s even gunplay. Within that context, allow us to direct you to the bestest beef of them all, between aides to R...
Man City's Vincent Kompany Uses Juventus Defender's Head To Score Goal
Hehehe! This is basically the soccering equivalent of the old “Stop hitting yourself! Stop hitting yourself!” trick....
Victor Moses's Breakaway Was An Emotional Roller Coaster
You know that feeling when you step into traffic without looking, only for your friend to pull you back right as a car speeds right past where you almost stood, wind blowing into your gratefully stunned face? That’s probably how Victor Moses felt after Dimitri Payet sent home a rebound at the end of...
The Miami Dolphins Are The First Team To Earn A Yakety Sax Treatment
Congratulations, Dolphins. This Boots’s for you....
It Was Really Too Wet To Be Playing Soccer In Brazil Last Night
When Brazilian Série B clubs Boa Esporte and Oeste faced off in Itápolis last night, the “field” they played on was really more like a lake. I’m actually kind of impressed by the highlights below: they sort of played a real game of soccer on a field you could teach a kid to swim on. The ball just di...
The Cardinals Played A Center Fielder Who Can't Throw
The Cardinals just beat the Cubs 4-3 in the last of a three-game set, avoiding the sweep and earning one of those Important Victories that will be referenced when the team’s playoff readiness is discussed. It was an exciting game, complete with a three-run, eighth-inning rally and some spectacular p...
Reports: Bruno Mars Invited To Perform At Super Bowl Halftime Show
Here are a pair of reports stating that the NFL has asked Bruno Mars to play a part in the Super Bowl 50 halftime show, just two years after his last appearance....
Is This Bad? (It's Bad.)
The U.S. is losing to Peru at halftime in a friendly at RFK, which is not a good thing. This shot, though, is a worse thing. ...
Soccer Lady Has Absolutely Zero Aiming Skills, Scores Awful Own Goal
The announcer had the correct reaction to Helén Eke’s foot mysteriously turning into jelly upon contact with the ball: “Nej nej nej!” As did Eke, who attempted to tear off her ponytail, no doubt to disguise her appearance so that she could creep out of the stadium and hide under a rock for the next ...
And Now, The Rare Sacrifice Fly Scored By A Man From Second Base
Tigers center fielder Anthony Gose caught a long fly from Josh Donaldson during fourth inning action in Toronto today and casually started jogging back to the dugout. That’d be fine, except it wasn’t the third out of the inning—and the Blue Jays had Ryan Goins on second base....
Jose Bautista Gives Up An Inside-The-Park Home Run
Jose my friend, what’s going on here? Delino DeShields got the easiest and silliest three RBIs of his career here thanks to Bautista’s drive-by defending. Lost in the folly of the Blue Jays outfielding is the absolute clinic third base coach Tony Beasley is putting on here to usher in all three of t...
Keeper Realizes He Doesn't Actually Have Time Freezing Powers, Gives Up Goal
Generally you don’t want to take five minutes before clearing a backpass. Welp, you learn something every day!...
Chicharito Had A Couple Of Brutal Misses Today
Manchester United hammered Club Brugge 4-0 in Bruges today to advance to the Champions League group stage. Wayne Rooney emphatically ended his goal drought with a hat trick, and United are assured the massive revenue from at least six more Champions League matches. Practically the only Red Devil to ...
Bayern Munich Concede Eight Seconds Into Match
Bayern Munich is one of the world’s top soccer clubs, but the record they broke today is one they’d rather forget as Hoffenheim’s Kevin Volland scored eight seconds into the match—the fastest in Bundesliga history. ...