owl Page 261 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Ten-Year Ban For Whipping Out His Junk
One of New Zealand's premier lawn bowlers is facing a decade-long ban from the sport after he "flopped out my old fella" to tell his teammates they were "playing like dicks." New Zealand's a strange, strange place....

The T-Shirt For People Who Like Soccer, But Hate Yelling
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Tampa Bawww: Scribes Cry Foul Over Northeast Super Bowl
As soon as Roger Goodell announced that the 2014 Super Bowl would be played at the new Meadowlands Stadium, our nation's finest sportswriters hit the panic button. But lets bring them in from the cold with a little, you know, logic....

Sixth-Grade Bowler Finishes In The Money At PBA Event
Kamron Doyle pocketed a cool $400 for finishing 30th (with a 215 average) at the Canton Open. Hit him up on MySpace! (Actually, don't do that. He's 12.) Your parents are so disappointed in you right now. [AP/Bloomberg]...

Awesome Track Coach Wins League Championship By Disqualifying Girl For Friendship Bracelet
South Pasadena High pole vaulter Robin Laird thought she won a league championship last month when her final vault clinched the meet. Then the opposing coach helpfully pointed out that she was wearing a string around her wrist. Clutch!...

So You Will Be Able To See The Giants And Jets After All
"What a bunch of blockheads!" You said it New York Post....

Ridiculous Rain Delay Proves Once And For All That College People Have Too Much Free Time
Florida Atlantic and Western Kentucky were mired in a rain delay of indeterminate length and decided to get a little silly rather than adjust their jocks and spit sun-flower seeds like those layabout MLBers. H/T, like, 15 of you. [YouTube]...

There's No Going Back For Urban Meyer
Yesterday, Meyer apologized to the reporter who he confronted on Wednesday. Both say the meeting was productive and they're ready to move on. So it's all in the past now, right? Not so fast....

Your Ex-Girlfriend's Favorite Gum Vs. Nocturnal Avians: Cornell-Temple Open Thread (BRACKET BUSTER WATCH)
Temple coach Fran "I Wasn't In The Beautician and the Beast" Dunphy and Cornell coach Steve "I'm Not Phil" Donahue are longtime friends. This either ends in a dramatic tie or a bloodbath....

Extinct Michigan Wolverine A Metaphor For Something, Probably
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Jets Offer 50/50 Proposition; Somehow Still Underdogs
The Jets want to flip a coin with the Giants for the right to have the first game at the new Meadowlands Stadium. Seems fair, after they lost the coin toss to get their own stadium. [NYJets.com]...

Cranky Old Sportscaster Unloads On Congress, Curling
Beano Cook is an American treasure, and nearly 66% of you agreed with that assessment about two years ago. From his rapier wit to his extensive knowledge of the game, Cook deserves our respect. But, let's have some fun instead....

There's A Reason They Go South For Spring Training
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Aggravated Assault? Needs More Cowbell
Mississippi State students can rest easy tonight, because police have finally located the man who brutally beat a fellow student at the Egg Bowl with, yes, a cowbell....

Man Claims Sportsbook Stiffed Him On Silly Kim Kardashian Prop Bet...Which They Did
A reader placed a tiny wager on what color top Reggie Bush's gilrfriend would wear to the Super Bowl. His choice? Black. It appears, in that photo, to be black. He claims Bodog.com would not pay out. Who will die?...

When Drew Brees Went To Lucy's
Sayeth Cajun Boy: "Of all the video/images I've seen from last night's Saints victory celebration in New Orleans, this one of Drew Brees leading the crowd at Lucy's in a pregame-style chant is the absolute best..."[CajunBoyInTheCity]...

I Was There: Those Aren't Tears, I Swear
Todd C. was at Pat O'Brien's on Bourbon Street and shot some video at game's end that represents the only touching moment in the bar's history that did not involve Rohypnol. He writes in an e-mail:...

I Was There: "... And This Couple Starts Having Sex In The Window Of The Bar"
The bon temps rouler-ed all weekend long in New Orleans, and Mike was there in his bumblebee costume. We're told he's still drunk. Let's pick up his account midstream:...

Enraptured Saints Fans Decorate Drew Brees' Home With 'Thank You' Shrine
The front gates of Drew Brees' home near Uptown turned into one giant display of heartfelt gratitude for his quarterbacking service to Who Dat Nation. One reader, who lives close by, gave us some pictures. See more after the MORE....

Is That A Fleur de Lis In Your Throat Or Are You Just Drunk?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....