owns Page 45 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Derrick Rose, Who Should Definitely Relax, To His Doubters: "Kill Yourself" [Update]

In a press conference this afternoon, Timberwolves guard Derrick Rose twice told reporters that anyone who doubts his basketball ability should kill themselves. Per Minneapolis Star Tribune reporter Chris Hine:...

Trevor Bauer Has Been Harassing A Woman For More Than A Day Now

Science boy, drone enthusiast, and big dumb asshole Trevor Bauer likes to be a spicy weirdo on Twitter, where he’s prone to holding forth about racism and anti-Trump bias and blocking people who criticize him. On Saturday night he stepped up his online crankiness when he launched an ongoing harassme...

I Mean, He Does Carry The Ball

ESPN Doesn't Appear To Know What Happened During The Civil War

In the latest example of why things from the internet should stay on the internet, the Monday Night Football crew decided to talk about their latest online discovery: the Capt. Andrew Luck twitter account. For those unfamiliar, the parody account features an avatar of Luck’s face over a Civil War ge...

Peter King Is Back On His Bullshit, Removes Antonio Brown From All-Pro Ballot To Appease His "Good Conscience"

Peter King did what Peter King does best and decided to stand up for the moral sanctity of a league institution: the NFL’s All-Pro team. The former Sports Illustrated columnist told Mike Florio on Friday’s Pro Football Talk Live that he couldn’t “in good conscience” keep Steelers wideout Antonio Bro...

Skins Linebacker Zach Brown Gets Upset About His Own Quote Calling Out His Team's Bad Culture

Earlier this week, the Athletic’s Tarik El-Bashir and Rhiannon Walker published an in-depth look at how Washington’s defense fell apart as the team lost six of its last seven games. Among several damning quotes from players and coaches, linebacker Zach Brown might have spoken the harshest truth, whe...

Warriors Get Go-Ahead Overtime Bucket After Just An Incredible Blown Call

The Rockets and Warriors were tied at 132 with less than a minute left in overtime Thursday night when Kevin Durant lost control of the ball in the paint and chased it into the corner. Here’s what happened:...

Referee Karl Hess Came Within Moments Of Catching A Swirly From A Large And Pissed-Off Head Coach

Scene-munching referee Karl Hess worked a Samford-East Tennessee State overtime game Thursday night, eventually won by ETSU, 81–72. Hess, you may recall, was shitcanned by the ACC in January 2015 after an ugly taunt of a former Wake Forest board of trustees chairman broke the camel’s back, but he’s...

The Spiraling Memphis Grizzlies Are Now Punching Each Other

The Grizzlies lost to the Detroit Pistons Wednesday night, 101–94. It was an ugly, frustrating performance for a Memphis team that has now lost 10 of their last 13 games after a promising 15–9 start to the season. The angst and frustration appears to have boiled over in a team meeting held after the...

That Is Definitely Not How You Pronounce That Name

Louisville Metro Police Officer Deidre Mengedoht was killed during a traffic stop right before Christmas, when her cruiser was rammed by a truck driver, who was later charged with murder and operating a vehicle under the influence. On a Dec. 29 broadcast, WPSD’s Brianna Clark reported on her funeral...

Texas Handler On Mad Bevo Attack: "He Was Just Going To Say Hi"

Texas defeated Georgia in the Sugar Bowl 28-21 on Tuesday night, likely thanks in large part to the intimidation provided by their mascot, a 1,600-pound steer named Bevo, against Georgia’s mascot, a 62-pound English bulldog named Uga....

Lamar Jackson And The Retooled Ravens Completed Their Romp To The Playoffs

For all the sublime football the Chiefs, Rams, and Saints provided us this year, the most entertaining aspect of the season may have been the Baltimore Ravens’ transformation from fodder for the rest of AFC into the NFL’s scariest War Rig. They beat the Browns today, 26-24, to clinch a playoff berth...

Dallas Stars CEO Takes A Heaping Dump On His Team's Most Prominent Players

The Dallas Stars are currently eighth in the NHL’s Western Conference, and are narrowly holding onto the second Wild Card spot. But they’re just 4–8 over their last 12 games, and stars Jamie Benn and Tyler Seguin are ranked 57th and 67th in the league in scoring, respectively. Apparently, disappoint...

Steelers Coordinator Says His Defense Will Have "A Problem" Covering A Guy Who's Been On Injured Reserve For Three Months

The Steelers are in a tough spot. Their late-season swoon has put them in the unfortunate position of needing a win from the dreaded Browns in order to have a chance at claiming the AFC North and advancing to the playoffs, when it has been literal decades since anyone has been able to rely on the Br...

Referee Meltdown In Celtics-Rockets Surprisingly Has Nothing To Do With James Harden's Footwork

The Rockets ran away from the Celtics Thursday night, in a game that was marred in both halves by some especially spotty and sensitive refereeing by the officiating crew. The officials handed out six technical fouls—three against each team—and at least a couple of them appeared to be the result of r...

Won't Someone Please Think Of Dana White?

UFC president Dana White was a bit of a shithead towards a reporter on Thursday during the press conference for the recently-relocated UFC 232. To make things easier for Jon Jones to participate in the headlining fight after an “atypical” drug test, the pay-per-view event was move from Las Vegas to ...

Jarvis Landry Unleashes Arm Cannon With 63-Yard Throw

Baker Mayfield has spent a majority of today’s game slicing the Bengals’ secondary into pieces. He’s been having so much fun, in fact, that he’s even passed off some of the Browns’ throwing responsibilities to non-quarterback teammates, like Jarvis Landry. On the first play of a drive starting at th...

Maniac Football Coach Teams With Maniac Basketball Player To Deliver Watered-Down Gordon Gekko Speech To Impressionable Young Browns

This is just an unbelievably cursed combination of proper nouns: Browns head coach Gregg Williams used help from retired coin-operated fortune-teller Phil Jackson to arrange for dead-eyed thinkfluencer Kobe Bryant to deliver a motivational talk to his young team ahead of their week 15 game this past...

The Browns Are Respectable, And That's Already A Major Achievement

The Cleveland Browns have not had a winning season since 2007. The closest they’ve been to .500 was a 7-9 campaign in 2014, and that becomes even sadder with the reminder that those Browns, under then-head coach Mike Pettine, had squandered a 7-4 start to get there. (He was fired after his second se...

This Nightmarish Bulls Season Appears To Be Wearing On Poor Horace Grant

The Bulls lost to the Magic in Mexico City Thursday night, in a game that was mostly uneventful, apart from leading scorer and leadership council member Zach LaVine hearing an ominous pop in his lower leg on a late drive. Some interesting news came after the game, when ESPN reported that Jabari Park...