parents Page 5 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
It's Melanie Hain's Turn To Bring The Team Snacks When She Says It Is
"I know what you're thinking; "Did she give me six orange wedges, or only five? Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. So you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?" A Lebanon, Pa. woman had her concealed-weapons permit revo...
No Child Left Behind On The Stationary Bike
The great thing about growing old in the 21st century; no worries about ordering children to get off your lawn. That's because no self-respecting kid these days would be caught dead playing outside; it's too cold/humid, there's smog, Michael Jackson is roaming free, and as we know, the outdoors are ...
Through The Looking Glass With Nine-Year-Old Jericho Scott
The parents of Jericho Scott, the nine-year-old New Haven, Conn. pitcher who was banned from pitching because he is too good, are officially suing the youth league that is disbanding his team. In response, the league held a press conference to tell their side of the story, and a huge mob of reporter...
Common Sense Strikes Out: The Curious Case Of Jericho Scott
Nine-year-old Jericho Scott has been banned from pitching in a New Haven, Conn., youth baseball league because he throws so hard that he frightens the other players, according to league officials. But he took to the mound on Saturday anyway, so the other team simply dropped their bats and left the f...
State Supreme Court Justice Shows Bad Form
A New Jersey State Supreme Court Justice is being sued for allegedly using his title to intimidate school officials following a dispute between his son and one of his former high school football teammates at Haddonfield Memorial High School . The suit, filed by Conor Larkin, claims that Justice Rob...
Boston Little League Crushes Rogue Parent, Keeps Nation Free For Democracy
A seven-year-old Boston area Little Leaguer was benched for two games recently when his mother didn't show up for her scheduled shift at the league snack bar. The Freetown Youth Athletic Association levied the penalty on the child due to his scofflaw mother, who claims that — get this — she had to w...
Mitch Williams Supports Youth Athletics, Is Not At All Insane
Former Phillies reliever Mitch Williams has never been one to see an injustice go unchallenged, even if that does mean being unceremoniously tossed from his 10-year-old daughter's youth league basketball game for screaming the F-word several times at a female referee....
We Can Only Imagine What The Parent-Teacher Conferences Are Like
Further proof that Texas is tougher than your state: Even the first-grade teachers are bad-ass. A couple of them engaged in fisticuffs at a youth basketball game on Saturday, leaving one bloody and bruised, and the other on the lam from police. No word yet on whether either of them is hot....
All Sixth Grade Girls Games Need Stands Clearing Brawls
From today's "Little League parents are freaking insane" file, we present you with a story that we are glad to point out is not, in fact, from Ohio. It's from Oregon, and it involves one crazy coach of sixth graders....
Packers Fans Tend To Be Wise And Capable Parents
You know about this by now, but it must be addressed. Well, it seems that some kids wear their Green Bay Packers clothing by choice. Others, not so much. When 36-year-old Matthew Kowald's 7-year-old son refused to wear a Packers jersey during Green Bay's playoff game with Seattle on Saturday, Kowald...
Eat Ice, Evil Doers!
In Canada, it's never too early to teach the fundamentals of the national sport, even to eight-year-olds. Inside and outside edges, skating backward, forward crossovers, and if there's a scuffle on the ice you go over the boards and get in a few good shots, son!...
And Jesus Said, Turn The Other Cheek
Two surprising things about this item: 1. It didn't happen in Long Island, and 2. It wasn't featured in any of the Porky's movies. Other than that, hey, I stopped being shocked at the antics of youth sports parents and coaches long ago....
Maybe Next Time He'll Use Mapquest
Welcome to Long Island; a primitive, lawless land where roving gangs of youth sports parents will take you down like a wounded wildebeast. Snake Pliskin won't even go in there anymore. Last week we told you of the inspiring story of two mob-connected brothers who beat up a Little League coach for be...
Just Another Peaceful Day Of Youth Baseball On Long Island
At first glance it's the story you've heard a hundred times before: Little League coach benches player for swearing; player calls dad on cell phone; dad and uncle arrive and pummel the coach unconscious on the pitcher's mound; arrests ensue. But this one has a few twists: Mob connections, federal wi...
The Gay Mafia Invade The Mothership
Oh, hello there. We, the fine gentleman from Kissing Suzy Kolber, have been charged with guiding you folks through this, the very first weekend of the NFL season. And we could not be more excited. Not only do we get to watch football, we also get to rush to the computer every five minutes to do HTM...
Childhood's End
What were you doing when you were five? (My answer revolves around cartoons and mud). Sacramento-area native Jan Silva is attending a tennis academy in France, all expenses paid. In fact, the academy's owner, Patrick Mouratoglou, will pay an estimated $140,000 this year to train him. Did I mention t...
Kicking Pepperoni On The Ump
There are so many ways to express your displeasure with an umpire. You can boo; some do this quite effectively. You can send him angry letters. You can say nasty things about him on a message board. Or you can throw pizza at him....
East Side Little League Will Cap Your Ass
First of all, this is not a hockey post. This Wade Campbell is a Little League dad, who, concerned that his son wasn't getting enough playing time, had a cheerful discussion with his coach. Yes, the term "shot down like a dog" was used, but only in the most constructive of ways....
Ken Griffey Jr. Should Be A Billionaire By Now
A sun-splashed Saturday afternoon, on a Little League Field somewhere in America:...
Michael Jordan Ready To Bag Champaign Coeds
Beware, Alpha Phis gallivanting around at Kam's or C.O.'s: Michael Jordan's gonna hit your campus soon, and he doesn't care for your "no cigar smoking inside" rules....