patrickkane Page 6 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Patrick Kane Does Something Really Nice
PK showed up at a 10-year-old fan's floor hockey birthday, because he's an all-around decent guy. See Patrick? We love you! Please come back to us, Patrick. [Chicago Tribune]...

Beer In The Stanley Cup Looks Like Piss: More From The Patrick Kane Collection
Would you believe it's been a year, to the week, of the Blackhawks capturing the most famous trophy in all of professional sports? To remind you what Vancouver and Boston are playing for, here are a couple new photos from Patrick Kane's time with the Stanley Cup. ...

Patrick Kane's Offseason Begins With A Black Eye, Taking A Girl Home From A Club
Oh Kaner. We take a lot of shit for giving you shit, but you keep giving us shit to give you shit for....

Patrick Kane Needs A Drink
Your morning roundup for April 27, the day we let the idiots drive the national agenda....

Dueling Mullets Welcome You To Day One Of The NHL Playoffs
Your morning roundup for April 13, the day Justin Bieber reminded us that the Middle East is still fucked up....

Chicago's Marty Turco Uses Bench Time To Place Bets With Fans, Write "Turco Rules!" On $5 Bills
Marty Turco signed a one-year contract with Chicago last summer and expected to start in net for the Blackhawks. But for much of the season, he's served as Corey Crawford's back-up and has gotten well-acquainted with the pine. He hasn't started a game since Feb. 11. So Turco's now looking for new so...

A Love Song For Kane And Toews That May Have You Questioning Your Own Masculinity
Via Crossing Broad comes this video mash note to the Blackhawks' two dreamboats. Patrick Kane and Jonathan Toews exchange long, knowing glances with each other and...you. All set to the dulcet strains of Katy Perry....

Did Patrick Kane Have A Two-Day Hangover? (UPDATE)
Patrick Kane missed Blackhawks practice Monday and Tuesday with "flulike symptoms." The team wouldn't elaborate, but flulike symptoms might consist of nausea, vomiting, chills, aches, weakness, diarrhea. What else could cause those? Maybe, just maybe, throwing down at a Chicago bar on Sunday....

The Missing Stanley Cup Game 6 Puck Is Now Worth $50,000 And The FBI's Time
The puck from Patrick Kane's Stanley Cup-winning goal disappeared in June. Since then, a Chicago restaurant has offered $50,000 for it, the FBI has disproved one impostor, and a multiple-angle Zapruder film emerged. It's significant piece of rubber, you see....

Patrick Kane Is More Alcohol Than Man At This Point
It's apparently Patrick Kane week here at Deadspin. So please accept this dump of assorted drunken sightings of the Blackhawks hero tooling around with Jimmy Buffett, rocking the flat-brimmed Reds cap, and getting "iced."...

Patrick Kane's Drunken Stanley Cup Road Trip Rolls On
That crazy kid puts down the Twlight books for a second to bring the Cup to Wrigleyville watering hole Moe's Cantina. Drinking out of the cup, and using it to pick up chicks? You betcha....

Patrick Kane Loves Him Some <em>Twilight</em>
Seen on MySpace: Stanley Cup Winner. Likes: Team Edward. Dislikes: When my mom comes in my room without knocking first....

Breaking: Patrick Kane, Stanley Cup Stuck Atop A Ladder Truck In Downtown Buffalo
That is all. You may resume your business. [h/t Tom]...

Reader Submits Alleged Post-Coital Photo Of Patrick Kane
Email accompanying this photo circulating around Chicago area: "My co-worker's friend hooked up with Patrick Kane last week... and took a picture to prove it. Apparently, he was only so-so in bed."...

Patrick Kane: A Portrait In Inebriation
Via NBC Chicago, here's a compilation of Kaner during the Blackhawks' victory parade today in Chicago. Watch him chug champagne, catch crowd beers, drink from the Cup, and slur his speech with the moxie of a 10-year veteran. Video inside....

Chicago Blackhawks Win The Stanley Cup
It's over. Patrick Kane wins it for the Blackhawks with a "secret" goal in OT. Good for him. (Update: Now with bonus video of Jeremy Roenick's tears.) [NHL.com]...

Hockey Players Have Surprisingly Average, If Hairless Bodies
As a nice middle-of-the-road counterpoint to the flab of Terrence Cody and the idealized manhood of Greg Oden, here are some Blackhawks shirtless in a limo....

Is The Big Ten The Best Hoops Conference?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Mario, Luigi Wanted For Assault, Battery
Super Mario Kart is the greatest sports game of all time; if you disagree, you are a Communist. That's why I bring you warning that the game is much uglier when translated into real life....

Patrick Kane Deprives World Of Potentially Amusing Trial
The Blackhawks forward pleads guilty to disorderly conduct and is ordered to apologize the cab driver he allegedly punched. So this whole sorry mess is behind us. Dang. [Mouthpiece Sports]...