pee Page 8 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
On Safe Spaces: A Message For College Graduates
Oh God, it’s graduation season. Can’t we pause this somehow? I just got done adjusting to the LAST graduating class entering the workforce and ruining everything. Can’t we put a five-year moratorium on graduations so that the rest of the world can take a breather? You’re all exhausting and terrible,...
Why Can't Golf Always Be Like This?
I’m not one of those snot-nosed shits who will say stuff like, “Golf? Bleehhhhhh. Golf is so boooooring!” while doing a sick ollie. I like watching golf! It’s a perfectly pleasant way to pass a Sunday. Having said that, I was riveted by the video above, and now wish golf was always played like this....
Peeps Are The Worst Seasonal Candy
Easter is upon us. You know this—even if you don’t have a grandmother sending increasingly frantic texts asking what time you’ll be there for dinner on Sunday—because the commercials have all gone pastel and there are goddamn Peeps everywhere. If you don’t care about the religious significance, East...
DeAngelo Williams Heckles Jordan Cameron While He Pees
So that’s a weird headline. It only exists because DeAngelo Williams and Jordan Cameron are part of this year’s American Football Without Barriers camp in Egypt, and also because it’s hard to hold a pee on a long bus trip....
What Is That Thing On Stan Kroenke's Head?
Rams owner Stan Kroenke has been in the news lately for his part in a disgraceful shitbag scheme that involves him moving his team from St. Louis to Los Angeles. This makes it a good time to ask a question we’ve long been meaning to ask: What the fuck is that on his head?...
A Bengals Fan Peeing On Someone, Drunk Teens, And More From Bengals—Steelers Arrest Report
Yesterday’s Bengals-Steelers game was an insane punching contest on the field, with a series of high-profile cheap shots and blows to the head down the stretch. Turns out the violence extended to the stands, and there were some doozies. The Cincinnati Enquirer has a rundown of six arrests that happe...
Don't Let Cat Puke And Dog Piss Ruin Your Life
On this episode of the official Ask a Clean Person podcast, Deadspin’s own Diana Moskovitz joined me to talk all about pet messes. Diana is a noted lover of cats, you see. So in her honor, and to draw on her vast knowledge of the fine and fancy messes that cats can make, we devoted the first segment...
Youth Football League Cancels Season Due To Violent Threats Against Officials
A youth football league in Mt. Pleasant, Penn., has cancelled its season in the wake of continued violent threats against league officials. The decision to cancel the season was made yesterday, after someone left a box full of ammunition shells with the names of league officers written on them at a ...
So We Got Suspended From Twitter
In case you missed it, Twitter suspended the @Deadspin account last night in what was, inarguably, THE WORST REPRESSION OF FREE SPEECH IN THE HISTORY OF MANKIND. Why were we suspended? What shadowy forces at BIG TWEET were conspiring against us? And why are we stupid enough to put the fate of our tr...
Little Football Players Abandon Game To Dance Like Champions
There’s an argument to be made that the more people learn about the inherent dangers of football, the less parents will be inclined to let their children participate in the game, thus leading to the eventual death of youth football. Thankfully, the Milford Mighty Mites have developed a plan to save ...
I Peed My Pants At A Little League Game, And Other Tales Of Urine-Based Humiliation
A moment of silence for the dignity of everyone who responded when we asked you to tell us about a time you peed your pants. You have no shame, and you should be proud of that. But my God! A lot of you have pissed yourselves at inopportune times! Here are the best of those stories....
Tell Us About A Time You Pissed Yourself
You may have a story about that one time you peed all over yourself. If you don’t, you likely have a story about that one time your buddy peed all over himself. We want to hear those stories. ...
Q&A: Speedy Ortiz's Sadie Dupuis On The Band's New Anti-Harassment Concert Hotline
Speedy Ortiz are a noisy, lurching, acerbic, ’90s-channeling rock band from Northampton, Mass., whose loudest release of 2015 is liable to be a phone number. On Labor Day, the quartet took to Facebook to announce the creation of “(574) 404-SAFE, our help hotline you can text if you are being harasse...
And Now, Our Favorite <i>Key & Peele</i> Sketches
For nearly four years, Keegan-Michael Key and Jordan Peele have been among the best at dishing out incisive racial comedy to a generation that sorely needed it. Whether making lighthearted jabs at pop-culture trends or tackling serious political issues, their sketches were at their best when they we...
Cops Say Sheldon Richardson Raced Bentley 143 MPH, Refused To Pull Over
New York Jets defensive end Sheldon Richardson is facing charges of resisting arrest along with “numerous traffic violations” after refusing to pull over for a traffic stop near St. Louis earlier this month, a local prosecutor announced today. But what really stands out are the speeds that police sa...
Pedro Martínez Talks Dominican Pride In Stirring Hall Of Fame Speech
Pedro Martínez played up his heritage and spoke directly to his fellow Dominicans today at his Hall of Fame induction, dedicating the honor to his home country and declaring the award a “sign of hope, faith, determination, strength, courage, and dignity.”...
The Cat Peed In My Suitcase, Of Course
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She’ll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....
José Mourinho Burns Premier League Rivals In Funny Award Speech
Nobody does smug satisfaction better than this guy. Even if this was obviously written by someone else, it’s that textbook José Mourinho delivery that makes it all worthwhile....
Please Do Not Interrupt The Indianapolis Motor Speedway Chairman
IMS chairman Mari Hulman George has been ordering Indy 500 drivers to “start your engines” for longer than most of us have been alive. Today, another woman tried to butt in on her command, Kanye-style. Mari Hulman George wasn’t having any of it, and damn near backhanded the young lady....
The World Is A Hurtful Goddamn Mess: A Message To The Class Of 2015
Oh, God. Grad season. THE WORST. Yes, it’s that time of year when colleges around the nation pay $50,000+ a pop for some celebrity or politician or (God help the children) author to come in and spray hot knowledge all over the senior class before the kids can finally stand in line for a diploma and ...