penguins Page 18 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Evgeni Malkin And Sidney Crosby Are: Hairy Guy And Gladiator
Not sure if that's "pimp", or the more general "hirsute man from the 70s." But to echo the comments every Penguins fan, Geno probably should have gone as the Invisible Man: he already has the costume. Meanwhile, someone ask Crosby if he likes gladiator movies. [Twitter]...

The Caps And Pens Were Acting So Maturely For A While There
Alex Ovechkin—who once did this—called out Arron Asham for his post-fight gestures, so Asham fired back by calling Ovie a "hypocrite." Meanwhile, Brooks Laich wishes brain-addled players like Jay Beagle weren't coddled so much by the NHL's concussion guidelines. The teams don't meet again until Dece...

Arron Asham And Jay Beagle Give Hockey A Fight To Fight About
All right everyone, we're about to discuss a hockey fight, so I need you to put on your level heads. There's going to be talk of league office discipline, and a bit about the culture of enforcers, and maybe even a mention of concussions. These are topics that cause otherwise normal individuals to ...

Here's Your First Bloodied-Face Picture Of The New NHL Season
Presenting Tim Jackman, of the Calgary Flames, from last night's season-opener against the Pittsburgh Penguins. Jackman didn't score any points in the Flames's 5-3 loss, but he did serve a two-minute minor for too many men on the ice. H/T to tipster Noah D., who reports "Jackman actually went in fo...

The Ups And Downs Of Sidney Crosby's Scrambled Brain
Our old friend Katie Baker has published an exhaustive timeline of Penguins superstar Sidney Crosby's concussed 2011 at Grantland.com. Take those things out of your ears and go read it! [Grantland]...

Well, This Is Ominous Non-News About Sidney Crosby's Brain
The headline on the Penguins' official site, which has some editorial independence but is for all purposes the NHL's Pravda: "Crosby Visits Leading Specialists."...

Matt Cooke Is Gonna Try Really, Really Hard Not To Be A Cheap-Shot Artist Anymore
As Matt Cooke kept busy last winter by performing his usual song-and-dance of blindside hits and head shots on Penguins opponents, his wife, Michelle, was in the hospital battling a kidney infection. The ordeal, according to the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review, was known by his teammates and coaches—and ...

Islanders Decide Not To Showcase Bloody Brawl After All
"...the party will go on, but the Islanders and MSG Network have agreed to switch the game to a victory over the Sabres in which Michael Grabner's hat trick goal was the winner." [Sports Illustrated]...

The New York Islanders Will Have A Party To Celebrate The Bloody Low Point Of Last Season
Undeterred by that whole Probably Moving to Kansas City thing, the Islanders are throwing a party at Champions Sports Bar in Uniondale, NY to celebrate the goriest night of last night's hockey season....

Jagr To Pittsburgh: Nope
Officially, the record will say the Penguins withdrew their 1-year, $2 million offer to Jaromir Jagr. But it's fairly safe to say that Jagr, who's had the deal in front of him for a few days, made it clear he wanted more. More money? More years? More of a chance at a Cup?...

Where In The World Is Jaromir Jagr?
No one knows where Jaromir Jagr, 39, the once-mulleted, twice-Stanley-Cup-champion is. (Jagr's planning on returning to the NHL after a three-year absence, and his agent told us to expect a decision soon.) But people have theories....

Here Are Both Of Last Night's 2OT Cockpunches
Playoff hockey overtime might be the single greatest thing in the sports world — assuming your team isn't involved. Then it's a war of nail-biting, heart-stopping attrition, destined to end in glory and highlight compilations for one side, and wondering why you even bothered staying up late for th...

Sidney Crosby, Rebecca Black, and Parody Videos: Everything We Hate, For A Good Cause
Playoff time means fans making parody videos for their teams. Spring 2011 means that at least two-thirds of those videos will be set to Rebecca Black's Friday. Enter Benstonium's "Crosby."...

Even The Top Seed In The Playoffs Isn't Good Enough For This Expressive Bulls Fan
Your morning roundup for April 9, the day it became painfully evident that knowledge gleaned from the Old Testament and YouTube videos do not a professional at-home circumcisionist make....

VCU Has Now Forced Its Unbearable Victory Song Upon Us
Your morning roundup for March 30, the day Peter Venkman signed on to play FDR....

Matt Cooke Is Suspended 10 Games And The First Playoff Round For His Latest Cheap Shot
It's been just over a month since Matt Cooke's last suspension, so of course he's due for a headshot like this one, which he delivered to Ryan McDonagh in a 5-2 loss to the Rangers last night. Cooke is suspended for the remainder of the season (10 games) and for the first round of the Stanley Cup ...

The NHL Doesn't Seem To Think The Islanders Can Control Their Players
Your morning roundup for Feb. 13, a day in which a Supreme Court justice prepares to celebrate five years of playing mum at work....

The Cleveland Cavaliers Are On A One-Game Winning Streak
Your morning roundup for Feb. 12, the day Mars-commute impregnating became a non-starter in the name of continuing the colony....

Sidney Crosby's Season Might Or Might Not Be Over
Sidney Crosby got to talking about his recovery from last month's concussion. He said he hopes to come back this season, but can't say for sure whether he will....

Two Minutes Of Matt Cooke Cheap Shots
He's the kind of player you love if he's on your team. But for the fans of the 29 other fanbases, here's a highlight reel of Cooke's greatest hits to peruse while he sits out the next four games....