pens Page 10 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Josh Gordon Officially Suspended By NFL For "At Least" A Season
It was inevitable once Adam Schefter reported that Josh Gordon had tested positive for alcohol, but today the NFL made it official: Gordon is suspended for the entirety of the 2015 football season. The Browns released a statement confirming the suspension—which is without pay and for "at least one y...
Tommy Craggs Owes Me Money
In August, I learned that the Jell-O people were rolling out an expanded line of college football logo Jell-O molds and that, in the course of promoting them, the Jell-O people were loudly proclaiming that they WERE NOT to be used to make Jell-O shots. I proceeded to completely lose my mind at the i...
Holiday Gift Guide: For Your Generous Party Host
One of the best things you can give to a friend who has invited you into his or her home for the holidays is something good to drink. But telling you to buy a bottle of booze would make for a pretty boring, if practical, Gift Guide. (If you do buy a bottle of booze, be a love and wrap it nicely?)...
Report: Adrian Peterson Skips Previously Agreed To Hearing With NFL
Since pleading no contest to child injury charges almost two weeks ago, Adrian Peterson has been embroiled in a dispute with the NFL about when he can return to the field. A Facebook post from Adam Schefter reveals that Peterson and the NFL had previously agreed to a disciplinary hearing scheduled...
Reports: Aldon Smith's Suspension Could Be Terminated Shortly
Aldon Smith was suspended nine games by the NFL in August, after he was sentenced on weapons and DUI charges. But according to a report from Mike Florio and confirmed by Chris Mortensen, the NFL is considering reducing that suspension by one or two games. Since Smith has already sat out seven game...
LaRon Landry Responds To PED Suspension With Penis Illusion
Colts safety LaRon Landry was just hit with a four-game suspension for taking PEDs, which should surprise absolutely no one who has ever seen LaRon Landry. But Landry seems to be pleading innocence, at least according to a weird picture he just put on his Instagram page...
NFL Lifts Dion Jordan's 4-Game Suspension, Suspends Him 4 More Games
Back in July, the NFL suspended Dolphins defensive end Dion Jordan four games for taking "banned stimulants" that violated the league's performance-enhancing substance policy. Good news! The league lifted Jordan's ban today, after two games. Bad news! The NFL suspended Jordan four more games....
Wes Welker Suspended Four Games For Amphetamines (And Maybe Molly, Too)
Well, damn. According to Adam Schefter, the NFL will give Broncos wide receiver Wes Welker a four-game suspension for violating the league's performance-enhancing drug policy. Welker reportedly used amphetamines. (Update: Molly?)...
Mariners Suspend Jesus Montero For Ice Cream Incident With Scout
Last week we told you about an incident involving Mariners catcher Jesus Montero, a heckling team scout, and a hurled ice cream sandwich. In light of what happened, the Mariners have decided to suspend Montero for the rest of the season....
ESPN Insider: Suspensions Creating "Minefield" For Shout Show Hosts
Education reformers often cite reducing suspensions in our nation's schools as a top priority. Lots of recent studies show that this form of punishment does more harm than good. ...
Another Miami Dolphin Suspended For PEDs
Miami Dolphins safety Reshad Jones has been suspended four games for violating the league's policy on performance enhancing drugs, the NFL announced today in a classic Friday news dump....
Report: Dustin Johnson Had "Sexual Indiscretion" With PGA Player's Wife
Yesterday, golfer Dustin Johnson released a statement saying he would be stepping away from the game to take care of "personal challenges." According to a report today on Golf.com, Johnson was suspended six months for testing positive for cocaine. He's allegedly failed three drug tests since 2009,...
How Do Other Notable NFL Suspensions Compare With Ray Rice's?
With news coming down that Ray Rice will be suspended a mere two games for knocking out his wife and then dragging her unconscious body out of an elevator, we figured it would be constructive to look back at the length and severity of other notable NFL suspensions from the past....
Asshole Cannot Find Pen, Writes Entire <em>NYT</em> Trend Piece About It
Even by the standards of fake trend pieces in the The New York Times, today's column in about "The Demise of the Pen" in—where else?—the fashion and style section is exceptionally breathtaking in its presumptuousness. Join me now and marvel as writerer Nick Bilton turns a moment of sheer banality i...
Braves Suspend Dan Uggla For One Game, Reportedly For Tardiness
Braves second baseman Dan Uggla hasn't been a lineup regular since May, and with his .241 OBP, that makes sense. Tommy La Stella's taken his spot and hasn't provided any reason to give it back. Things got worse for Uggla today when Atlanta simultaneously called up another second baseman and suspende...
The NFL Is Dumping Bad News On Us While Nobody Is Paying Attention
The Friday afternoon news dump is a tried and true tactic for any organization looking to get some negative press in and out of the news cycle as quickly as possible. With tomorrow being a holiday and most of America already checked out for the long weekend, the NFL decided to unleash a classic news...
Yankees Reliever Suspended 50 Games For Fun Drugs
Yankees reliever Alfredo Aceves has been hit with a 50-game suspension for violating the league's substance abuse policy, but not for doing the kinds of drugs that usually get guys punished. Aceves wasn't trying to cheat, he was just trying to party....
Runway Food Run Amok: Crowning Aspen's "King Of Porc"
After about 90 minutes at Grand Cochon in Aspen, Colorado, it all starts going to your head. Whether it's a function of being crowded into a century-old ballroom with hundreds of others at an altitude of 8,000 feet, the cumulative effect of spending three days treating wine as one of the four main f...
The Secretly Recorded Videos That Got A Raging Baseball Coach Suspended
On April 17, Rick Vanderhook, the head coach of the Cal State Fullerton Titans, a powerhouse in Division I college baseball, was placed on administrative leave. He returned to the team a month later, but the reason for his brief absence remained a mystery. Now, thanks to documents obtained from Cal...