pets Page 1 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
ATP roundup: Casper Ruud wins twice to take Geneva title
Second-seeded Casper Ruud recorded a pair of victories on Saturday to capture his third Gonet Geneva Open title in four years in Switzerland. ,Ruud advanced to the final with a 1-6, 6-1, 7-6 (4) win over Italian Flavio Cobolli to complete a match delayed on Friday because of heavy rain. The 25-year-...
‘Bullpen’ is the hill you wanna die on?
Yesterday, the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) called upon Major League Baseball to stop using the term “bullpen.”...
Sunnnnny days, chasing Coviiiiiid away … Sesame Street invades SEC Nation
Big Bird got to Neyland Stadium early on Saturday to make sure he had a good seat for Tennessee against Florida....
Chip The Buffalo Destroyed His Dick And Balls With A T-Shirt Cannon<em></em>
No point in keeping you waiting for this one—on Saturday, Chip the Buffalo, Colorado’s sideline mascot, blasted his dick and balls with damn t-shirt cannon and by the grace of God, someone had their phone out to film the vicious neutering of what was once a happy-go-lucky creature....
The Hater's Guide To The College Football Top 25
College football, the looser and more fun but also worse version of football played by younger and less well-compensated people than those in the NFL, is back baby. Or maybe is already back? Anyway the timing is complicated, because while the good stuff gets going this weekend, college football’s la...
Georgia's Latavious Brini Arrested After Using Counterfeit Bill At Pet Store, Opening Pet Supplies Reward Card Under Fake Name
Georgia freshman defensive back Latavious Brini was arrested on a felony forgery charge yesterday after he allegedly used a fake $100 bill to make an $8 purchase at a pet store and pocketed the change, according to ESPN. ...
One Year After The Election, We Still Wanna Die
Yesterday marked the anniversary of Donald Trump’s election victory and despite the encouraging gains made by Democrats the other night in down-ballot races, particularly in Virginia, filthy liberals like me are still, uh, not exactly soothed to have a ignorant bag of Velveeta in charge of things. I...
Dogs Are Wonderful, Adorable Messes
Who’s a good dog? Yours is! It can be a bit of a mess, though....
And Now, Some Incredible Things Your Pets Have Eaten
Last night my dog ate a shitload of flour off the floor when I spilled it, which seemed bad until I tweeted out the story and learned that readers’ pets have perpetrated far, far worse culinary crimes. Here now are some of the best:...
Show Us The Pets
Hello. The internet says that today is National Pet Day, the day for pets. Bring forth the pets!...
When Serena Williams Asks For An Apology, She Gets It
Serena Williams, fresh off her 6-3, 6-4 win over Lucie Safarova in the second round of the Australian Open, was in no mood to dwell on the negatives. So when a reporter asked about her 23 unforced errors, she was sure to extract an apology:...
The 300-Year Journey From Classical Standard To Gay Disco Anthem To The Most Iconic Anthem In Soccer
The first leg of the 1994 UEFA Cup Winners’ Cup semi-final between Arsenal and Paris Saint-Germain at the Parc Des Princes was rife with the tensions of early ‘90s provincial fandom. “The Boulogne Boys [PSG’s right-wing hooligan supporters] were looking for Arsenal fans to attack in the build-up to ...
Consider Purchasing Pet Health Insurance For Your Very Good Pets
These have been a shitty couple of years on the pet front. Last fall, Millie, my beautiful, miraculous boxer, started panting all the time. She was still a radiating core of joy and energy, but her panting was making it hard for her to get comfortable and her energy was slowly but noticeably waning....
Matt Duffy's Cat Is Too Damn Fat To Make The Trip To Tampa
Yesterday, the San Francisco Giants traded third baseman Matt Duffy to the Tampa Bay Rays in exchange for starting pitcher Matt Moore. Unfortunately, Duffy’s extremely large cat, Skeeter, is not cut out for the sweltering Florida climate....
Please Do Not Licki Your Kitty
There’s a special, biologically intimate relationship that animals have with their own kind. Dogs sniff at the butts of stranger dogs in search of their anal sacs, and the secretions of the chemicals within—it’s their version of a handshake, and gives pups an idea of what to expect from one another ...
Don't Declaw Your Cat
If you get a cat—and, you should, cats are fine—you should be prepared for them to scratch on everything in your home (except, confoundingly, the scratching post). You can and should combat this by keeping their claws clipped to a safe and sanitary length, just as you do your own nails, or by purcha...
Counterpoint: Pets Are Good
Earlier this morning, this very website presented the case against pets. I would like to offer the following counterpoint:...
The Case Against Pets
Let’s talk about pets. They are made for cuddling. They nuzzle and purr and wiggle. They show their cute little bellies, asking for scratches. When we’re blue, they bring comfort. When they act like silly imbeciles, we make videos of them and share their antics with strangers on the internet. Pets g...
This Weird Camera Tracks What Makes Your Pet Happy
I’m not going to tell you that your dog doesn’t care about social media because his sense of animalistic wonder about the world is more compelling and pure than your obsession with likes and retweets. Let’s be honest—dogs are needy attention hounds who are shameless in their quest for constant atten...