philadelphia Page 114 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Family Rushes To Vomiting Fan's Defense In Eminently Quotable Fashion
Now I'm no Perry Mason, but I'd say that if your defense rests in part on there being a distinction between a right person and a wrong person on whom to ralph, your case is lost already....

Apropos Of Nothing, Here's Phillies Vomit Kid Doing Madonna Karaoke
Mean-spirited? Yeah, a little. Only tangentially related to sports? Sure. But fuck it. Here's Matthew Clemmens (stage name: Pukemon) with "Material Girl."...

A Blow-By-Blow Account Of The Vomiting Phillies Fan
In our #tips section, we received a purported firsthand account from someone sitting in the same section as Matthew Clemens, the New Jersey man accused of throwing up on an 11-year-old girl. We reprint it here for your reading pleasure....

Last Night's Winner: Not This Guy
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Unlike this Phillies fan, who on Wednesday at Citizens Bank Park allegedly jammed his fingers down his throat and vomited on an 11-year-old girl and her father....

Phillies' Season Officially Kicked Off By Lap Dance For The Handicapped
It's a couple days old, but we needed time to come to terms with this video of a man in a Jazzy Scooter getting ridden by one of Philly's, um, Phinest. [via Busted Coverage]...

Donovan McNabb's Legacy Haunts Philly In Guise Of Bank Robber
Police are on the lookout for this man, suspected of committing a major jersey foul. Also, robbing a bank. Rush Limbaugh doesn't know how to feel just now. [Inquirer]...

You Should Be Watching Hockey This Weekend, Seriously
Remember when everyone was so into hockey that time? Ha! But there's plenty to love: the NCAA championship, an NHL playoff berth battle, and oh yeah, some Slovenian hockey players who won their league title then beat up their coach!...

How Will Joe Biden Manage to Offend Soccer Fans Everywhere?
Joe Biden will participate in the "first kick ceremonies" tonight to welcome Major League Soccer's newest team to America's angriest city. How will he bungle this particular public appearance? Here, a few ideas....

Donovan McNabb Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Redskins quarterback (wow) Donovan McNabb, who stole a busy weekend show when he suddenly turned the tables on Philadelphia and became Bizarro Brett Favre....

Philadelphia Phillies: 10,000 Losses
Will Leitch will be previewing/musing on every baseball team each weekday until the start of the season. You can pre-order his book and follow him on Twitter. Today: The Philadelphia Phillies....

Mike Vick And Dogfighting's Rise In Philly
Dogfighting cases are way up in Philadelphia since Michael Vick signed with the Eagles. Is it a citywide crackdown, or did Vick bring a terrible fad north with him?...

"Who Isn't Fighting?" Here's A Better, More Brutal Look At That Lacrosse Brawl
Yesterday, we learned of a ridiculous fight at a lacrosse game. Today, the NLL released a video that shows just how ridiculous that fight was. Some day, they will show this video to schoolchildren to teach them about Darwin. [NLLInsider.com]...

Lacrosse Players Beat The Crap Out Of Each Other; Crowd Rejoices
The Boston Blazers and the Philadelphia Wings had a little lacrosse brawl Saturday, doing to each other what everyone has wanted to do to a lacrosse player at some point. Kudos to the quick-thinking music coordinator (Mötley Crüe!). [The700Level.com]...

Is Donovan McNabb Dicking The Eagles Around?
If you can think of a better explanation for stating he'd like to be traded to a team that has no intentions of trading for him, I'd like to hear it....

Philadelphia's MLS Team Plays Dirty, Like A Philly Team Should
Well, the Philadelphia Union exist now. And if one game is a large enough sample size, they're going to be every bit as physical as the city has come to expect from its teams....

Spring Training Win Way More Important Than Silly "World Series"
According to awesomely free Philly Metro, a ninth-inning rally by Wilson Valdez exacts "some measure of revenge" for the Yankees beating them at that whole "world championship" thing last fall. I guess one micron counts as "some measure."...

This Explains A Little More About AI's Absence
Tawanna Iverson filed for divorce, after 8 1/2 years of marriage. Unemployed father, sick child, broken home; it's like the Iversons are a microcosm for every recession-hit Rust Belt family. Besides the millions of dollars. [Philly Daily News]...

Well, That AI/Philly Reunion Was Fun
The Sixers announced Allen Iverson won't return to the team, ostensibly to spend time with his ailing daughter. Then why was he in Charlotte over the weekend, partying it up with Jermaine Dupri? [Philly Daily News]...

Real, Live Brian Westbrook Says He Has No Plans To Retire
From 97.5TheFanatic:"My plan is to continue to play, I'm gonna put all my effort into doing that and I will make a return to the NFL. " He made no mention of Howard Stern's prostate. [SRI]...

Lionel Hollins Would Like To Give A Hand. A Terrifying, Terrifying Hand.
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....