phillies Page 38 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Darren Daulton, The Only Man With The Stones To Speak The Truth
A little part of us have always wondered if Darren Daulton's whole time-traveling, metaphysics schtick is a bit of a intricate prank foisted on us by Dutch and John Kruk. But even if it is, it doesn't matter, because it's endless entertaining regardless....
Cubs Are Iguchied, Drop One Game Back Of Brewers
No first place for you, Chicago Cubs. Oh, why, why? (Bangs head against refrigerator). The Philadelphia Phillies, bolstered just before game time with the addition of pitcher Kyle Lohse from the Reds (6-12, 4.58 ERA, tiny, ill-advised goatee), beat the Cubs 4-1 on Monday. The loss dropped Chicago to...
What Not To Do With A Golf Cart
An absolutely bizarre story from Citizens Bank Park in Philadelphia, and proof that you should always be careful with your golf carts....
Phillies Get Started On The Next 10,000
I think we all remember the halcyon days of April 1883; a simpler time, when Chester Allen Arthur was President, the Brooklyn Bridge had just opened and the Philadelphia Phillies franchise had no losses whatsoever....
Phillies Fans Finally Find Their Happy Place
While hanging out at the ole Philly Pants Party this weekend, we were amazed when a man, during our tailgate, walked up and handed us a flier. "Celebrate 10,000!" it said, with the requisite Web site all posted up and ready to go. The guy was wearing a Phillies jersey and, it seemed, in most circums...
It's Philly Pants Party Eve
A reminder to those coming along for the Philadelphia Pants Party tomorrow: Be ready for booze. (And dudes.)...
The Wind Was Angry That Day, My Friends
"Help! The infield tarp has got me!" If you heard those words, what would you do? The host Colorado Rockies cowered in their dugout, but the Phillies' Shane Victorino is made of stronger stuff. Hearing the panicky cries of Rockies groundskeeper Keros Johnson, who was trapped in the middle of a wind-...
Come Join Us At The Philly Pants Party
After a bit of a delay, we have the details for the next Deadspin Pants Party, to be held in Philadelphia on Saturday, July 14. It's all official and stuff: You can buy your tickets right here. Game starts at 3:55. We will be there, as will the esteemed balls of A.J. Daulerio....
Quite A Year So Far For Ejections
As Braves manager Bobby Cox inches closer to the all time ejections record, One More Dying Quail takes a look at all the ejections in baseball so far this year. Some fun tidbits:...
Throwing A Baseball Is Hard
In lieu of Danny DeVito's wretched throwing out of the first pitch at the Phillies game yesterday — we suspect he had some physical disadvantages here, like, say, being able to move his arms — and the disaster that was Cincinnati mayor Mark Mallory, we are thinking a bit today about ceremonial first...
Shane Victorino And His Skirt Can Be On Your Dashboard
Pity poor Shane Victorino. The Phillies outfielder/journeyman is being honored with his own figurine at a Phillies game on June 3, which has to be a thrill for any major league baseball player. (It was certainly a thrill for Mr. Celery!) Why Shane Victorino? Well, he's Hawaiian, and that makes him u...
Naked People Are Funny
Nothing beats a good streaker, kids, particularly when it's a Philadelphia streaker. And we're not particularly envious of that usher either....
Baseball Players Are Athletes
Seriously, what happened to Antonio Alfonseca? He was always big, but ... wow. We suppose you can eat faster when you have six fingers....
Ryan Howard To Fight Michael Strahan For Jared's Meat
If you caught the afternoon baseball game on Fox yesterday, you might've seen the new Subway commercial starring Jared and Phillies slugger Ryan Howard. I didn't see it, myself ... but since it doesn't yet exist on YouTube, I have to assume that means that it's way less gay than the giggling Michael...
Nobody's Better At Losing Than The Phillies
Here's a factoid we didn't know: With just 33 more losses — a figure, at this rate, they'll reach by June — the Philadelphia Phillies will become the first professional sports franchise to reach the sainted total of 10,000 losses. Somehow, it seems fitting that the milestone will be reached by a Phi...