pitt Page 59 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Penguins Fan Gets Kicked Out Of Nassau Coliseum For Being Shithoused
"Sandstorm" plays in the background as a security guard escorts this super drunk Pittsburgh Penguins fan out of his seat. Islanders fans in his section console him by chanting "ASSHOLE" as he gets booted. Jarome Iginla's number one fan has his playoff hockey experience cut short on account of being ...


The Pirates Are Incredibly Good At Losing In Milwaukee
Look, everyone, it's something else to indicate what a shitty baseball team the Pirates have been for the last two decades!...

Pirates Starting Pitcher Has Spectacularly Short Outing
Pittsburgh lefty Jonathan Sanchez started last night's game in St. Louis. His stat line reads as follows: 0.0 IP, 3 H, 2R, 2ER, 2 HR, 1 HBP. He faced four batters and threw all of 17 pitches, and then he was gone. He did not get hurt....

<i>Ottawa Sun</i> Columnist Writes Article About His Balls
Everyone's favorite on again/off again goon, Matt Cooke, returned to Ottawa Monday night for the first time since slicing Erik Karlsson's Achilles tendon. It was an important game for Ottawa's playoff push, but Cooke's return made it special....

Jack Edwards Is Crazy, Compares Matt Cooke To Sirhan Sirhan
And just like that Jack Edwards cashes in all that Boston good will....

Félix Pié Was "Covered In Beer" After Near-Fight With Fans
With all the other news going on this week, we missed the fallout from the Pirates' minor league dustup on Tuesday, the one that found outfielder Félix Pié—and possibly other players—trying to climb into the stands to fight fans in Toledo. A reader who was there has contacted us with more specifics....

Pirates Fan With Giant Novelty Glove Catches Foul Ball
They say you are supposed to stop bringing your glove to the park when you're an adult, but they never say anything about not bringing your giant-ass novelty glove with you. This wonderful Pirates fan—grown man that he is—chose to exploit that loophole at last night's Cardinals-Pirates game, and the...

Did Evgeni Malkin Miss Last Night's Game Because Of A Sunburn?
No. That did not actually happen. But for a while there Saturday evening, it sure looked like it might actually be the reason Malkin would miss Pittsburgh's game against the Florida Panthers. ...

A.J. Burnett Wears A.J. Burnett T-Shirt Like A.J. Burnett
All fans who bother to show for Reds-Pirates tomorrow night will receive this handsome A.J. Burnett T-shirt. Need any more of an incentive? How about this promo featuring A.J. Burnett wearing the shirt, which the gang at Getting Blanked kindly gif'd for everyone. Yeah. That ought to get the good fol...

No, Notorious Hamper-Pooper Najeh Davenport Was Not Arrested After A Police Chase
Najeh Davenport is not a robber, although he did shit into a woman's laundry hamper one time. For a short time today, it seemed like Davenport was both a thief and a hamper-pooper, as it was reported by multiple outlets that Miami-Dade Police had arrested Davenport in connection with a robbery follo...

"I Love Boobs" Gets The Approval Of The Carolina Hurricanes Pre-Game Show
We ordinarily try to avoid recognizing personalized jerseys, but we're making an exception just this once because poor Chantel McCabe of Fox Sports Carolinas happened to make that gesture just as that Penguins fan stood in that spot....

Steelers Player Tweets Really Dumb Photo
Last October, Steelers nose tackle Alameda Ta'amu got wasted and decided to play bumper cars with several parked vehicles on Pittsburgh's South Side. Thursday, Ta'amu was sentenced to just 18 months' probation for it all. Last night, Ta'amu's friend tweeted the photo you see here, and Ta'amu re-twee...

The Dodgers Instagram Account Is Pretty Weird
Following another dominant performance from Clayton Kershaw, the Dodgers Instagram account posted the whimsical picture you see above last night with the following caption:...

That $2.1 Million Honus Wagner Card Is A Bargain In 1911 Dollars
From Dan Good at the New York Post:...

Sidney Crosby Took A Puck To The Face
NHL points leader and early MVP frontrunner Sidney Crosby left the ice under his own power after taking a puck to the mouth in the Penguins game today against the Islanders. Crosby has famously suffered head injuries leading to prolonged absences, so this is a distressing sight beyond the cringe-in...

What The Hell: Jarome Iginla Traded To Penguins
We went to bed thinking Jarome Iginla was going to be a Bruin. Nearly every single rumor had the 17-year vet heading to Boston, and when Iginla was a healthy scratch for Calgary's late-night game, it seemed a fait accompli. The sun rises to find Iginla in black and gold, but without the Bruins' spok...

In Potential Conference Finals Matchup, The Penguins Find An Extra Gear While The Bruins Run Out Of Gas
It's hard to take any larger lessons from Bruins-Penguins, a low-yield bet to be your Eastern Conference finals matchup, since neither team was at anything close to full strength. Evgeni Malkin is out at least a week with a mysterious "upper-body injury," most likely a shoulder injury suffered Satur...

The Steelers' Leadership Controversy Is Stupid
The Steelers went 8-8 in 2012, missing the playoffs for just the seventh time in 21 seasons. Surely there must be some sort of explanation. So why not a really dumb debate over whether the team lacks veteran leadership?...
