pittsburgh Page 68 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Ritual Pierogi Guy Sacrifice Sure To Fix Things In Pittsburgh
What do you do when you're on a 12-game losing streak, rank 30th in hits, are dead last in the National League Central, and have such a defunct PR apparatus that you have to rehire your GM in secret?...

Indoor Plumbing Comes To Pittsburgh
Oh good, the "lets flush all 552 toilets at the Penguins' new arena and hope the place doesn't blow up" test was a success. Apparently, the septic system tanked a few seasons in a row to get the top new equipment. [Post-Gazette]...

Pittsburgh Seeks Brave, Able-Bodied Young People For Controlled Toilet Flushing
Are you over 18 and a fan of coordinated, group activities? The Pittsburgh Penguins would like 250 "students" to flush all the toilets at the newly constructed Consol Energy Center. In other news, Western Pennsylvania now runs on toilet news....

The Pittsburgh Ownership War Heats Up
Pirates owner Bob Nutting is still bitter over the Penguins' ownership group's attempt to buy the Bucs. When the Pirates fired back with a petty, "objective" column (on a team-run site) trashing the Pens for this season's failure, it ignited a firestorm....

Why Won't You Die, Montreal?
For the second time in two rounds, the eighth-seeded Canadiens have won a Game 7, on the road, knocking off both the President's Trophy winner and the defending champs. Obviously, we'll have to kill them in our dreams....

Pasta-Based Terrorism Strikes Pittsburgh Marathon
Here in New York, someone tries to set off a bomb in Times Square, and life goes on a couple hours later. In Pittsburgh, they divert the marathon after finding a microwave with some noodles inside. [WTAE]...

Things That Are Not Yet Banned By NFL.com: Pittsburgh #7 Jerseys With "Therapist" On The Back
It's the perfect gift for both Browns fans and Jezebel readers this Arbor Day. Plus, it's fun to say in your best Darrell Hammond-does-Sean Connery voice. [PhillyBlunt]...

Private Stache: A New Feature In Which We Revisit The Unintentionally Hilarious Sports Photography Of Yore
As keeper of Sports Illustrated's indispensable Vault, Andy Gray spends a lot of his time sifting through the sports photography of another time, when athletes wore short shorts and facial hair, and everyone looked vaguely uncomfortable. Here is one such photo....

Easy Money: Bet On Whoever's Playing The Pirates
It's been said that you should never bet on your favorite team; you're just setting yourself up for double heartbreak. Well, one Pirates fan has concocted a fascinating experiment/get-rich-quick scheme: he's betting against the Bucs in every game this season....

Dear Pittsburgh: It's Just Hockey
Police say a Penguins fan killed his wife and burned down his house after an argument over staying up late to watch yesterday's 3OT game. So that's Pascal Leclaire's first playoff start, and first accessory to murder charge. [WPXI]...

Ben Roethlisberger Suspended Six Games (Unless He Isn't)
NFL PR confirms that Roger Goodell will suspend the Steelers QB for six games, pending "behavioral evaluation" that could reduce/lengthen the suspension before the season starts. The question: Can he literally keep it in his pants until August? [NFL.com]...

Lawyer Claims He Knows Of Yet Another Ben Roethlisberger Accusation
A Boston attorney claimed on WEEI sports radio today that he knows of another case involving Ben Roethlisberger, a Las Vegas night club, and "identical" allegations to the ones he was just cleared of in Georgia. So this isn't over?...

Last Night's Winner: Steeler Pride
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the good of people of Pittsburgh, who don't stand for miscreants, rabble rousers, or hippies. Plus, their heroes very rarely get charged with crimes....

Santonio Holmes Probably Going To Sit A Few Out
Santonio Holmes is facing a suspension for violating the NFL's substance abuse policy. As the exact reason for the suspension is not yet known, wildly unfounded speculation is welcome below. [PFT]...

Loneliness, Thy Name Is Pirates Fandom
Reader Chris sends along this picture of The Omega Man of Pirates fans. Why stay in the second row? Does PNC Park employ totalitarian ushers? Is he afraid of looking the fool should a foul ball approach? Fascinating to ponder....

The Biggest Supporters Around
To conclude one of the boobsiest days in Deadspin history, here's this picture of some strategically placed fans/cameramen at last night's Thunder-Jazz and Penguins-Capitals trackmeets. Mutton wins again. H/t Eric and Patrick....

More On The Santonio Holmes' Lawsuit: Lies, Damned Lies and Face Rubs
According to several conflicting reports about the incident that led to a lawsuit against Santonio Holmes, the Steeler won't face criminal charges, but only because he intimidated the victim by letting her rub his face?...

Santonio Holmes Shows Steeler Solidarity, Gets Sued By Woman He Met In Nightclub
A woman in Florida has filed a civil suit against Holmes after an alleged nightclub incident, in which she claims he hit her in the eye with his....oh, thank goodness it was just a glass. [Courthouse News/ESPN]...

Pittsburgh Pirates: October 14, 1992
Will Leitch will be previewing/musing on every baseball team each weekday until the start of the season. You can pre-order his book and follow him on Twitter. Today: The Pittsburgh Pirates....

Tebow Draft Rationalization Watch: Pittsburgh Needs A Leader
As the NFL Draft approaches, many team fanbases will attempt complex logical gymnastics to talk themselves into using a first-round pick on Florida quarterback Tim Tebow. Today: The Steelers try to solve their current quarterback's character issues....