pr Page 502 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Crystal Palace's Training Ground Kitchen Given Zero-Star Food Hygiene Rating After Mouse Infestation
The United Kingdom’s Food Standard Agency revealed that a training facility kitchen belonging to Premier League club Crystal Palace received a food hygiene rating of 0 out of a possible five. The agency’s website notes that the score means that “urgent improvement is required” in areas like food han...

David Moyes Is The Most Interested Man In The World
Southampton fired Mark Hughes today after finally realizing what was evident to just about everyone the day he got the manager position there, which is that things were almost certainly not going to work out. And like your unemployed cousin who desperately needs a job so he can finally move out of y...

Jurgen Klopp Invades Pitch And Leaps Into Keeper's Arms After Late Liverpool Winner
Jurgen Klopp’s emotional sideline outbursts have almost become commonplace since he became Liverpool’s manager in 2015. But the German displayed a new level of excitement during his team’s 1-0 win over Everton. Divock Origi took advantage of a goalkeeping mistake from Jordan Pickford, and broke the ...

Report: School Officials Determine High School Football Players Caught Running Nude With An Oreo Between Their Ass Cheeks Were Not Hazed
School officials from Byron High School determined that the 10 football players who participated in an “Oreo Run” was not a result of team hazing, according to the Rockford Register Star. After nearly 30 interviews with coaches and players, along with some film analysis, they concluded that the play...

Jaylon Smith Somehow Not Flagged For This Devastating Helmet-To-Helmet Hit On Alvin Kamara
Early in the fourth quarter of Thursday night’s Saints-Cowboys game, Drew Brees threw a third-and-long screen pass underneath to Alvin Kamara. Kamara scampered eight yards up the right side, where he was met by Cowboys linebacker Jaylon Smith, who launched himself head-first at Kamara’s helmet....

Korean Soccer Player Expected To Fully Recover After Breaking His Neck On The Field
Three minutes into a playoff game in South Korea’s second-tier soccer league yesterday, Gwangju FC player Lee Seung-mo leapt into the air to challenge for a header, fell to the ground awkwardly, landed on his neck, and immediately lost consciousness. But thanks to some good fortune and the quick res...

Sweden Will Prosecute Hockey Player For Blind-Side Hit That Might Have Ended Daniel Paille's Career
A Swedish prosecutor has charged defenseman Thomas Larkin with assault for a blind-side hit on former NHLer Daniel Paille, a check to the head that appears to have ended Paille’s career. The hit “goes beyond a level of violence that can be allowed in sports,” the prosecutor told Sportbladet....

Stephen A. Smith And Will Cain Debate About Debating
The only way First Take can ever feel genuine or unscripted is when its loudmouths end up talking shop on air. Stephen A. Smith, a sputtering whoopee cushion that can be palpated to produce sports-adjacent commentary, got into it with milquetoast chud Will Cain on today’s show....

The Constitution Is Garbage<em></em>
Today, we’re talking about doors, gym TVs, pull-ups, broadcaster fights, and more....

Seriously, How The Fuck Did Anyone Let Chuck Liddell Fight On Saturday Night?
Golden Boy Promotions, Oscar De La Hoya’s outfit, promoted its first mixed martial arts event on Saturday night at the Los Angeles Forum. It was built more like a boxing card than a traditional MMA one, with the main event getting almost the entire focus and the co-feature getting a polite bit of l...

UFC Is Streaming A Bizarre Donald Trump Propaganda Documentary
If parody is still possible, the opening montage is beyond parody. You’ve got your orchestral strings. An American flag. The ubiquitous name slapped on the back of a helicopter: TRUMP. Then Dana White in his traditional uniform, jeans and a black shirt with an extra button undone, lavishing praise....

Premier League Votes To Force-Feed Fans Steaming Piles Of VAR Next Season
If you read this site you probably already know why VAR, soccer’s misguided foray into video replay, is shit. Up to now the Premier League admirably resisted the trend of competitions shoveling VAR down everyone’s throats, in part because of some high-profile local instantiations of VAR’s shittiness...

The Steelers Have Ransacked Le'Veon Bell's Locker
Le’Veon Bell officially ended his tenure with the Pittsburgh Steelers when he didn’t report to the team by yesterday’s 4:00 p.m. deadline. He will probably never set foot in the Steelers’ locker room again, which means that something needed to be done with his locker and the belongings that are stil...

Claudio Ranieri, Everyone's Lovable Soccer Grandpa, Is Here To Save Fulham
Despite spending something like £100 million in the transfer market in the summer, newly promoted Fulham have been the worst team in the Premier League by a good margin. Finally, they’ve decided to do something about it. Today the club announced that they’ve fired manager Slaviša Jokanović and repla...

This Is All Donald Trump Has Left
President Donald Trump often stands near a helicopter on the White House’s South Lawn while reporters shout questions at him. Certain elements of this ritual are the same every time. The wheedling honk of Trump’s voice and the uneasy tilt of his standing-on-a-hoverboard-for-the-first-time posture ar...

Super Nice Soccer Guy Rewarded For His Compassion With Easiest Goal Of His Life
The next time someone says nice guys finish last, show them this video of Maccabi Petah Tikva striker Habib Habibou tending to a hurt teammate and being gifted with a tap-in because of it, and you will have irrefutably proven the power of good karma:...

P.K. Subban Turns Down Fight By Declaring Himself A "Pussy," Telling Opponent How Much He Sucks
Predators defenseman P.K. Subban had himself a nice little chat with Avalanche defender Nikita Zadorov during a stoppage in play in Nashville’s 4-1 last night. Zadorov apparently invited Subban to fight him, and although the confrontation wasn’t caught on camera, a hot mic in the arena picked up som...

Remember When Donald Trump Asked If Pittsburgh Was Going To Bring Back Joe Paterno, Who Was Dead?
When Donald Trump is dropping remarkable word-turds every single day, some of them will inevitably be lost with the passage of time. In the last two weeks alone the Big Wet President has renamed a simpering fatberg “Beautiful Ted,” and he’s asked every man in an audience of 6,000 to raise his hand ...

James McClean's Refusal To Wear The Poppy Has Made Him The Most Hated Man In English Soccer
In England, Halloween ends and gives way to November in various ways: Pumpkins left on doorsteps begin their neglected descent into rot; the seasonal coffee flavoring changes to gingerbread; James McClean begins receiving death threats from a certain brand of soccer fan, including among his own supp...

Army Idiots Pranked Air Force By Jamming Their Live Mascots Into Crates
Before last Saturday’s Air Force-Army college football game, two dopey West Point cadets decided to prank their rivals by stealing their live mascots, which are falcons. Not knowing how to take care of an animal, these Army morons crammed the two birds into crates. It’s so unlike the military to use...