pr Page 579 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Of All The Dumb Things Ever Written About Analytics, This Might Be The Dumbest
We don’t really bother to cover the Basketball Analytics wars anymore, because what’s the point? “Analytics” is simply a numbers-based way of understanding what is happening on the court, whether those numbers are expressed as points or RAPM. It is self-evident that teams should use every tool avail...
Rich Clune Really Hates Cody Bass, And He Doesn't Care Who Knows
During warmups before tonight’s Toronto-Nashville game, Maple Leafs forward Rich Clune and Predators forward Cody Bass got into a somewhat heated confrontation:...
Yoenis Cespedes Peels Out On His "Yes, I Just Signed A $75 Million Deal" Vehicle
Yoenis Cespedes got paid this offseason, and he arrived at the Mets’ spring training facility riding a tricked-out, three-wheeled motorcycle thingy, as any rich person should....
I'm Unsettled By Freddie Freeman's Cat
Freddie Freeman and his wife Chelsea made the drive to Braves spring training yesterday, and they brought along Nala, the chillest cat who ever chilled. Nala is uncomfortably chill....
Craig Smith Did A Thing That I Have No Idea How He Did
I say this without hyperbole: this might be the most improbable thing that’s ever happened in sports. With a wide open net two feet away in overtime, Nashville’s Craig Smith shot the puck—somehow got his stick in front of it—and blocked his own shot....
The FIFA Election Is Already Very Silly
FIFA will hold its presidential election to replace Sepp Blatter on Friday. Well, Friday unless candidate Prince Ali Bin al-Hussein gets his way. Prince Ali has gone to the international Court of Arbitration for Sport in an attempt to postpone the election because he wants transparency. And transpar...
Rory McIlroy Made Shane McMahon Disappear For Five Years
Remember this guy? We’re pretty sure his last TV appearance was being the first to congratulate Rory McIlroy on blowing the 2011 Masters with a round of 80, nearly five years ago. Shane McMahon returned to Raw tonight, where we learned the CEO’s son will be taking on The Undertaker at Wrestlemania. ...
The Manchester United Backroom Power Struggle Theory We Desperately Hope Is True
There’s simply never enough intrigue and entertainment to be had from Manchester United to fully sate our appetite. Either they’re crushing all opponents at home and abroad, as they did during Alex Ferguson’s tenure, or they’re shitting all over themselves, the way they have in the few years since S...
You Wanna See Pablo Sandoval's Big Spring Training Belly?
Yeah you do....
Rangers Fan Hits A Dinger To Win Season Tickets For His Whole Family
The Rangers held the following contest today for those who put down initial deposits on season tickets: show up to Globe Life Park and smack a ball out of it, and the Rangers would cover the rest of the cost of those tickets. One fan, Byron Anderson, crushed it over the left field fence on his third...
Judge Rejects Darren Sharper's Plea Deal As Too Lenient
It was baffling that Darren Sharper’s plea deal, for pleading guilty to drugging and raping women in four different states, amounted to just nine years of prison time. It was baffling that the NFL safety turned serial rapist could have been a free man by 2023, and it was baffling that the feds, with...
Manchester United Are Toast
With a third of the Premier League season left, Manchester United find themselves in fifth place, six points behind Manchester City and the all-important fourth Champions League spot. It’s not impossible for United to pass City, but given their inconsistency this season it’s unlikely....
The Nets Finally Have A GM, And He's Got Less Than Five Hours To Make Some Trades
Well, this sure was unexpected:...
Mikhail Prokhorov's Got Jokes
The Brooklyn Nets don’t have a GM. This is a particularly bad time of year to not have a GM, because unloading some expensive, veteran talent in exchange for draft picks or cap relief is a good way for a bad team to begin trying to unfuck itself. So it was no surprise when Yahoo’s Adrian Wojnarowski...
No One Showed Up To That Anti-Beyoncé Rally, Which Might've Been A Prank To Begin With
A whole bunch of Twitter eggs took offense with Beyoncé’s Super Bowl halftime performance of “Formation,” which used imagery inspired by the Black Panthers. It made excellent copy for the insatiable content mill which we all must feed—it’s good and healthy to make fun of stupid people—but it didn’t ...
Reports: The Heat Are Scared Chris Bosh's Blood Clots Have Returned
Miami Heat forward Chris Bosh pulled out of the All-Star Game because of a strained calf, but stuck around Toronto to enjoy in some of the festivities as his decision not to participate was mostly a precaution. He has since returned to Miami for additional medical tests, and those tests may have ind...
Why Your Children's Television Program Sucks: <i>PAW Patrol</i>
It’s time once again for our ongoing series surveying the awful shows you’re forced to endure before you can finally kick the kids out of the TV room to watch sports for eight hours....
Arsenal Just Took A Sledgehammer To Leicester’s Glass Slippers
You’d be hard-pressed to find a purer distillation of why Arsenal beat Leicester City yesterday 2-1, and of why the Gunners were always likely to eventually run down for the league title the greatest story in sports, than that final fateful sequence....
Wrestling Legend "J.R." Jim Ross Calls The Dunk Contest Final Round
The final round of tonight’s NBA All-Star Weekend dunk contest proved to be one of the most memorable in decades, as Aaron Gordon and Zach LaVine combined for an epic battle—and that’s not hyperbole, as each player’s dunk was met by his opponent with an equally awesome one....