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How To Fight Depression
It has been a long goddamn winter. (At least it has here on the Eastern Seaboard of the United States, i.e. the center of the known universe.) If you and your people are anything like me and mine, all your conversations over the past few months have tended towards serious discussions of the end ti...

Is WrestleMania Going To Be Garbage, Or What?
Welcome to Deadspin's new irregular pro wrestling column, in which Tom Breihan and Ernest Wilkins will comb through the past month of superkicks, lariats, and 450 splashes in search of the greatest things that this most American of artforms has given us....

Burnley Beats Man City To Tighten Relegation Race, End Title Race
If the Premier League title race wasn't over six weeks ago when Manchester City failed to beat Chelsea, it surely is now, after Manchester City lost 0-1 to relegation-threatened Burnley....

Matt Phillips Scores 45-Yard Wonder Goal
QPR has only won one game in their last 12 across all competitions and it looks likely that they will be relegated, but they can take some measure of solace in scoring a strong goal of the year contender. Down 0-3 to a Crystal Palace side resurgent under Alan Pardew, Matt Phillips's belter spectac...

Fake Female Ole Miss Fan Used Twitter To Recruit Athletes For Years
A prominent Ole Miss athletics backer known for tweeting at and promoting potential Rebels student-athletes was revealed to be a fake account yesterday, ending years of speculation that the blonde and perky "Analesa Presley" did not exist at all....

José Mourinho Gets Philosophical In Rant Directed At Haters In The Media
“The world is a bit strange. Maybe because of diets, and maybe because of the quality of produce we are eating, I think memories are getting shorter,” José Mourinho begins his wild, metaphysical ride that somehow ends with him basically calling certain members of the media jealous cowards....

USWNT Striker Christen Press Is Way Too Fast
Like, those six players the USWNT's Christen Press runs past aren't scrubs. That's France, one of the best national teams in the world. And even they can't keep up with Press as, with two wicked bursts, she flies past them like they're stuck in quicksand before passing the ball into the back of th...

Dudes Who Allegedly Jumped MSU Players Brag About It On Twitter
Mississippi State football players Dak Prescott, Torrey Dale, and Damian Williams got jumped at a Waka Flocka concert in Panama City, Fla., yesterday, and pictures and videos of the incident were posted all over social media. One of the guys who allegedly attacked the Mississippi State players als...

Three Mississippi State Football Players Jumped At Waka Flocka Concert
Mississippi State football players Dak Prescott, Torrey Dale, and Damian Williams were reportedly jumped while at a spring break Waka Flocka concert in Panama City (Fla.). News of the incident—as well as pictures—first surfaced on the Elite Dawgs message board, and was confirmed by Panama City polic...

Ned Yost Is Pretty Bummed Out About That Bee Genocide He Witnessed
A spring training game between the Royals and Angels was delayed on Sunday so that a massive bee hive could be removed from a microphone behind home plate. There were a lot of bees!...

Daylight Savings Should Be Made Permanent
You know what was awesome? Yesterday. Yesterday was the first Daylight Savings day of the year, and the first Daylight Savings day of the year always feels like someone released you from a Siberian prison. The sun shone gold upon the melting snow. Children frolicked out on the street. Neighbors...

UNF Wins A-Sun, Gets First Ever NCAA Bid; Bandie Ecstatic
ESPN found a North Florida band member going berserk at today's A-Sun title game in Jacksonville, and this is before the Ospreys downed USC-Upstate to earn their first trip to the NCAA tournament. We can only assume what he did after the buzzer sounded was too extreme for television....


Alfredo Simon Drives An Actual Hot Wheels Car
From Detroit Tigers beat writer Chris Iott comes this photo of pitcher Alfredo Simon's car. If I were still 11, I would swear this is one of the five coolest things I've ever seen in my life....

The Best Beer Is From Oklahoma (Naturally)
On Friday night, I had the distinctly fat and drunk pleasure of attending Drink Craft Beer's Boston Cheese and Beer Fest. The pleasure was provided by the obvious means—one of the cheeses had cumin seeds right inside it! the beers were mostly good and occasionally excellent!—and also via some less...

NRA Secretly Backs Group Aiming To Save Elephants Now, Kill Them Later
A couple of weeks ago, a group called the Elephant Protection Association (EPA) sent an email to a Maryland woman with elephant-hugging tendencies after she'd registered for membership online. There was an important measure coming before the General Assembly in Annapolis, HB713, which would restr...

Prince Was An Afro-Rocking, Coach-Hating Schoolboy Basketball Player
This is a picture of Prince. In middle school. In his middle school basketball team’s uniform. Because he was on the team....

Vladimir Guerrero Had Hubris, And He Had Balls
The following is excerpted from Jonah Keri's Up, Up, & Away: The Kid, The Hawk, Rock, Vladi, Pedro, Le Grand Orange, Youppi!, The Crazy Business of Baseball, and the Ill-fated but Unforgettable Montreal Expos, a wonderful and definitive account of Montreal's much-lamented baseball team. The book w...

Will Jurors Hear About The <i>Other</i> Friend Aaron Hernandez Allegedly Shot?
With no smoking gun, circumstantial evidence is playing a large role in the state's case against Aaron Hernandez for the murder of Odin Lloyd. And what better way to convince jurors that Hernandez is capable of shooting his friend than by introducing evidence that he shot a different friend just fou...
