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Meet Timur Bekmambetov, The Loony Madman Behind <em>Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter</em>
Timur Bekmambetov, the director of Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, might be insane. I don't mean that as an insult. The man behind Night Watch, Day Watch, and Wanted isn't interested in nuance or character or plot or basic human emotions. Watching his movies, you get the sense that he doesn't spend...
-8½. Woody Allen's <em>To Rome With Love</em>, Reviewed.
1. One of my favorite Roger Ebert quotes goes like this: "The Muse visits during the act of creation, not before. Don't wait for her. Start alone." That's to say: To create great work, you must first work. Not everything you create will be perfect; in fact, most of it won't be. But you can't wait fo...
Steve Carell, The Star Next Door
Seeking a Friend for the End of the World is probably the most Steve Carell movie that Steve Carell has ever made. With someone else at the helm, this comedy-drama's quirky/emo storyline—two mismatched East Coast neighbors take a road trip together as the planet is weeks away from destruction—might ...
How Colorado Springs (And A Former Cold War Tactical Room) Became The Home Of The United States Olympic Committee
Fast Company published a fascinating article today, which details how the United States Olympic Committee came to make its home in Colorado Springs, Colo., after winning control over amateur Olympic athletes from the NCAA and Amateur Athletic Union. It's worth a read, especially for all you Olympip...
Getting Stoned And Playing <i>Mortal Kombat</i> With The Road Dogg: More Wrestler Run-Ins
Inspired by the saga of "Wrestling Superstar Virgil," pro wrestling's saddest man, we put out the call for your run-ins with the titans of the squared circle. If you've had your own encounter with wrestlers past or present, e-mail us, subject line "Virgilbag."...
Secretariat Just Set The Preakness Stakes Record
This is Secretariat's 1973 Preakness Stakes, somehow the least dominant of his Triple Crown races. He finished, officially, in 1:54 2/5, despite the fact that not a single timer had him clocked at that time. Now, 39 years later, the long-dead massive-hearted horse shaved more than a second off his...
Pixar Isn't Even Trying. <em>Brave</em>, Reviewed.
1. The brand Pixar has become so powerful and so reliable in the last decade that we forget that's all it is: A brand. We assume every new Pixar film will be well thought out and impeccably constructed, like the Pixar crew is one hivemind that taps into the American subconscious and springs a nevere...
Roger Clemens Found Not Guilty
The Roger Clemens perjury trial—a trial that was alternately confusing, nostalgic, and soporific, but at all times a giant waste of taxpayer money and government manpower—puttered to a sad and inevitable end today with Clemens being found not guilty on all counts....
Editor's Note: Suggesting Dan Snyder Is A Bullshitter Is Not As Libelous As Writing, "Dan Snyder Blows Dogs"
The previous post on Deadspin might have given the impression that Redskins owner Dan Snyder is a liar. Snyder takes such accusations very seriously, and so do we, which is why we now endeavor to answer the question: Is it libelous to suggest that Dan Snyder is a lying-ass shitbag vulgarian?...
Dan Snyder's Official Team Bio Is A Tour De Force Of Bullshit
When you think of Redskins owner Dan Snyder, you think of a miserable, gutless sack of shit who ruined a franchise and made an entire fanbase hate his guts. Ah, but that's just how Dan Snyder is perceived in the real world. The world of official team bios, on the other hand, is magical place where a...
Why I Lie: An Athlete's PR Guy Comes Clean
One of the toughest jobs of a publicist is learning how to lie. It's the one thing about my career that keeps me awake at night. I'm not looking for sympathy—I chose this profession. But as some of you know, it can be a dangerous circle, telling lies to keep other lies intact. ...
David Nalbandian Could Face Criminal Charges After Injuring Line Judge
We thought Nalbandian suffered enough yesterday after taking out his frustrations on the base of a linesman's chair. The wooden board splintered, drawing blood from the confused and angry judge, and Nalbandian was disqualified from the final of the Aegon Championships (not a Game of Thrones refere...
Curt Schilling Is Now On Leave From ESPN
Well, now that Curt is being sued by Citizens Bank for the $2 million (and other costs) he borrowed as personal guarantor on behalf of his failed video game company, 38 Studios, he's probably due for some time to sort things out. ESPN does expect the Baseball Tonight analyst to return later this se...
Female Indian Athlete Accused Of Rape, Having A Penis
Here's a song we've heard before. A female athlete is accused of not being a female. This time, the woman's name is Pinki Pramanik and she is an Indian runner....
You Whores: A Complete Guide To Woody Allen's Many Hooker Characters
When you've made over 45 films, it's pretty hard not to repeat yourself. Woody Allen's latest, To Rome With Love, which opens next Friday, has lots of now-familiar features: It's set in a touristy European city, it has a large cast (Alec Baldwin, Jesse Eisenberg, Ellen Page), and it deals with matte...
The Stupid, Stupid, Unforgettable Madness Of Adam Sandler. <em>That's My Boy</em>, Reviewed.
There are few things in modern cinema as reliable as an Adam Sandler movie. Since 1992, he's appeared in at least one film every year except for 1997, and just about all of them have been terrible. And yet there's something oddly comforting and exciting about the arrival of a new Sandler offering. I...
How Not To Be The Biggest Asshole In Media: 4 Lessons I Learned From Meeting Jay Mariotti And Reading His Awful Book
It's been almost two years since Jay Mariotti last wrote a sports column or appeared on ESPN. In that time, sports media's ur-controversialist—a pioneer of the sportswriters-being-dicks-on-television genre—has pleaded no contest to misdemeanor stalking and assault-related charges stemming from a hai...
Swedish Team In Trouble After Bare-Assed Game Of "Butts Up"
In my schoolyard it was called "butts up." In yours, it might have been "asses up," "wallball," "red ass," "suicide," but the game is the same, and taps in to the primal center of young boys' brains. It's essentially handball, but the first one to run up a certain number of "outs" must lean against ...
After 38 Studios Goes Broke, Bank Sues Curt Schilling
Immediately after Rhode Island extended the beleaguered 38 Studios a $75 million dollar loan, Curt Schilling's company took out a $2 million letter of credit from Citizens Bank as the security deposit on their Providence offices. Well, that's all gone now. 38 Studios is bankrupt, the office is close...
Steelers Receiver Dropped From Anti-Littering Campaign After Pleading Guilty To Littering
Pittsburgh is cracking down on littering, and it's not messing around. According to the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review, the city's mayor announced last month that "police will more strictly enforce the city's litter ordinances and fine scofflaws who throw trash on the ground." And, no, no one is above th...